Make My Heart Start Beating
by GoldenPetal13
Summary: AU - Set five years after Season Three, Kurt never left Lima, he never followed his dreams or got his prince. Some angst, some man on man, way too romantic over the top plot, some OOC-ness for plot reasons .
1. Chapter 1

Future Kurtbastian fic. It's five years since Kurt graduated and he never left Lima.

Rated M

Warnings: Way too much angst, man on man, overblown yet wafer thin plot, and yes I already know they go OOC on occasion, I claim artistic license and the fact I'm a total romantic (Plus Sebastian is harder to write than he looks), I give up the characters are annoying the living daylights out of me. And this is partly written while suffering writer's block.

There are 39 chapters in total, read on at your own risk.

Don't like don't read, though constructive criticism is always welcome (plus any reviews).

I own nothing, literally.

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**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**01**

Once upon a time…

There was a silly frog. And the silly frog believed he was a prince. He believed it so much he made a real prince fall in love with him and he was so very happy.

The silly frog thought he could sing, the silly frog thought he could dance, the silly frog thought he was special.

And then one day the prince woke up and saw the silly frog for what he was…

I hate fairy stories about princes and princesses and how love is magical and everything we should dream about.

Don't get me started on dreams.

Between them, love and dreams, my heart stopped beating.

On the day I graduated High School. On the day I escaped that living hell. On the first day of what was to be my glorious future, my prince broke up with me.

His parents were dragging him away from the unsavoury bad influence of me, as he'd been talking back and thinking for himself, and they packed him off to summer camp. I thought we would get back together afterwards, that it was temporary. He made me understand, gently, always gently, regretfully, full of his own pain and anguish, that we would not get back together.

Incidentally he ended up back at Dalton, with Sebastian. A very angry Sebastian, who had to learn the painful lesson of being sidelined and overshadowed by Blaine. Blaine who took back the soloist spot and was given the beloved leadership of the Warblers and turned them back to the ways of the council.

And that summer after Graduation was hard and it hurt, but I lived because my dreams kept me alive and I reached for New York with all my heart. The final two places at NAYDA came down to me and Rachel.

And so I lost that dream even as she told me how I'd be there next year, just a year behind, and really I could get extra credit, help my dad, and the Rachel Berry star shone brightly as mine burnt out and died.

Every other college was a bust. I'd left it too late.

In many ways it was destined to be because I could work in dad's shop, he could go and kick sense into a bunch of politicians that could never understand what it was like to live in the real world, Carole loyally by his side watching and waiting, being there, strengthening him and keeping his diet heart healthy.

And Finn, sweet Finn who followed Rachel to New York after the army was a bust and could never compete with the lights and the sparkles. Finn who made it through college and came out with a degree, much to his surprise, and who is following in dad's footsteps to enter politics, all those hard nosed people will run smack into my brother's big brown eyes and earnestness and stubborn muleheadedness, it'll be funny to watch them fall flat on their over paid asses.

On the day that I found out I wasn't going to NAYDA that I wasn't going to fulfil my dreams I went to Scandals. I conscientiously ordered the cab, in advance, and the hotel room for one, I'm not that kind of man, and then I proceeded to slowly get drunk. No strong spirits, everything diluted, I just wanted one night to numb it away. No boyfriend. No perfect college. No escape from Lima Ohio, just another Lima Loser after all.

And then I bumped into him, well he crashed onto the stool next to mine, that smirky meerkat face smirking at me, I was drunk, I knew when my taxi was getting here, only another ten more minutes.

He said nice things, no insults, no cruel jibes, I was so desperate but I went to leave on my own and then somehow he was in the cab because I foolishly invited him, then he was in the hotel room, and I have vague blurry memories of heated kisses and touches and fumbles, he was gentle, he didn't laugh at me, he used protection.

I remember the morning very clearly. I remember him getting up and sneering, "Well little lady gay face that was fun, not, I was right Blaine would be better in bed, guess we'll chalk this one up to an experiment gone bad, could you be less adventurous in bed?"

Luckily he didn't stick around and I never saw him again.

I stood under the shower shivering and feeling so dirty and used, I never thought I'd get clean. And then I caught a cab home. I helped Finn pack for New York and as I laid in bed that night I realised my heart had stopped beating.

Oh it pumped blood.

But it had stopped beating.

I threw my beautiful clothes out and bought boring boy clothes. I wanted to blend in, not to stick out, just another Loser in Lima.

Dad's finally stopped shoving college prospectuses under my nose, he's trying to get me to do night school instead. He's stopped asking around for guys my age because I don't date, ever.

Or sleep around.

I fill my days with work, most days the garage, sometimes at the Lima Bean, the gay faced barista, and I volunteer at the high school.

Most days I can forget and simply get through another day too tired to do anything else but collapse into my lonely bed at night.

Most days I can forget the past and live in the now. The quiet boring routine of now that I know so very well.

So I'm startled when I look up from grocery shopping to see a bunch of college brats messing about in the aisle. And then I see him. He doesn't see me. Freezing in place I panic and something hurts in my chest for a second.

I have my earbuds in, no music switched on, it's the best way to pass people so they don't talk to me, and I'm dressed in boy clothes, no product in my hair, he'll never remember me, I meant nothing to him all those years ago, I'll mean nothing to him now.

Passing them I hold my breath. He's the same age as Blaine, he's graduated college this year, so this summer will be his last before he enters work somewhere far, far away while he works part-time on his writing.

I leave them behind and breathe out in relief, he didn't remember me, I'm safe.

A hand lands on my shoulder making me jump as a jolt of electricity slides through me and I'm spun around to see him standing there, his cronies fan out to trap me by the feminine hygiene products, the perfect place for him to insult me about my apparent lack of masculinity.

"Kurt Hummel, I didn't recognise you for a second, you're wearing boys' clothes," Sebastian Smyth smirks at me in such a familiar way and I sigh waiting for the insults to really start.

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A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

And again sorry this isn't up to my normal standards, only 38 chapters to go...


	2. Chapter 2

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

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**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**02**

"Aw, come on Kurt, I know you remember me," That smirk on his face is firmly in place, I remember a softer look, a gentler look, but I was drunk that night and he'd only wanted one thing from me.

"Hello Sebastian," I answer him and then turn away to continue shopping.

His hand tightens on my shoulder and he wrenches me back to face him, that's going to bruise, I always did bruise easily, physically and emotionally.

"What no hug? No kisses? No 'How are you Sebastian?'," he mocks me.

"No, no hug, certainly no kisses," I tell him as his friends laugh, "But how are you Sebastian? It's not been nearly long enough since I last saw you."

"Ouch man," one of the idiots laughs even as Sebastian's mouth tenses and his eyes flash in anger as my stomach dips.

"I'm good Kurt, thanks for asking. You?" He half snarls.

"I'm fine, thank you, goodbye," I go to leave and his hand stays on my shoulder pinning me to the spot, I wiggle my shoulder but he doesn't let go.

"You know I don't see a man running around after you, so where is he?" Sebastian asks.

"Who?" I frown confused, if he means dad he's not getting back home for a few days.

"Don't play coy with me Hummel, the man in your life," I mentally wince, how like Sebastian to rub my nose in my single status. "Or are you too girly," his friends laugh, "To keep a man?"

That hurt, like so many of his insults they hit that bit too close to home.

"Even your jokes don't change, did you run out material? Or have you used up your limited rodent brainpower and need a rest?" I don't know where that came from, I've been nice to everyone for years, it's just something about him rubs me the wrong way.

"I forgot what a sharp tongue you have," his eyes have dropped to my mouth and I roll my eyes at him, I'm not drunk this time, I'm not falling for his lies, his very seductive tempting lies. "So you never answered my question, what about the man in your life?"

"There is no man," I say as calmly as I can refusing to take the bait he's offering, he'll just laugh at me now and I can go on my way and never see him again in my life.

His eyes light up and he steps closer, crowding me, "So that means you're free this evening, my friends are going out tonight, join me and I'll rock your world."

Really?

That's the best he can come up with? Taunt the lonely little Lima Loser promise him a night out and what? Fuck him before telling him how terrible he was and running away leaving him to pick up the pieces again. Does he still think I'm only eighteen?

"I'm sorry Sebastian, you have me confused with someone else. Clearly you don't remember it but you've already 'rocked' my world, and as you pointed out afterwards I wasn't that memorable." His friends go quiet as I lean into him, "And even if I were that desperate and drunk again I've learnt my lesson, no more picking up stray chipmunks," this time I shake his hand loose and escape with one last, "GoodBYE Sebastian."

"Wait," he calls out, "How come you're in Lima? I thought you'd be off under the lights of Broadway."

Ow.

Typical Sebastian, I twist to look at him, "I live here," near the end of the aisle I go to change direction and leave him far behind me.

"So do I," he yells, "See you round Kurt."

"Not if I see you first," I mutter and whip round the rest of the supermarket in record time.

Carrying my bags into the house I put the groceries away and then it hits me, what his plan had really been. Make the boring little girly gay guy squeal in happiness, scurry home, get ready to have his world rocked and then stand him up. I bet he'd be hiding around the corner with his friends laughing at me as I waited and waited for him.

He's so high school.

My phone beeps and I smile, it's David and Kyle. I let them know I'm working and that I'll see them tomorrow. Finally. Kyle has at last graduated from college and he and David are going to start their new lives together.

I'm a little sad, I'd thought for a while that David and I might end up together but then Kyle happened and David's so happy. Still Kurt Karofsky has a nice ring to it, and we've moved on from the teenagers we used to be, I like the adult version of David.

Skipping up the stairs I have a shower and pull on some jeans, non skinny jeans. A boring t-shirt, black to hide any alcohol stains. And some comfy converse shoes.

Locking up I drive all the way to Scandals and go to stand behind the bar, Kurt Hummel barman and cocktail drink mixer in a run down gay bar in Ohio. Not exactly how I expected my life to turn out.

The usual crowd turn up and I get them drinks, I eye up the boy who slinks in every few weeks, I've asked around, he goes to Lima East, he's underage, he never gets alcohol from me, but it's somewhere he can be himself.

I've recently been to Lima East and it's still a hellhole, I spotted him in the jock crowd, hiding. And that's part of what I do in McKinley, find the victims give them help, protection, and point them in the right directions to build a life that has meaning. I educate the lumbering idiots who bully, most just do it to be part of the crowd, because they never understand the consequences of their actions, and I try and find the few, like David, who bully for a reason and I try and help them because they should have chances too.

I have a reputation as a do gooder.

Also I find it interesting that the boy at the bar is Nick's little brother, his very gay little brother. I often wonder if he knows what his brother did to David, what he set in motion, but then I see the terror in the boy's eyes and I know that he does.

I've slipped him pamphlets on groups to call if it gets bad, he's read them and I get the odd smile from him.

I hope he makes it.

Opening up a non-alcoholic beer I put in on the bar for him, "Thanks," his voice is deep and gruff and oh so young.

Sliding his change back I shrug, "That's fine Brian, just don't ever drink and drive."

A loud commotion from the door and the group of college brats Sebastian was hanging with are there, oh no, not him, not here, oh please. My prayers are unanswered, proving once again there is no god, and there stands Sebastian.

He hasn't seen me, maybe I can hide behind the bar?

His friends are loudly saying what a dive this place is and they don't understand why Sebastian wants to come here, "Because in all of Ohio this is the best gay bar to go to," he snaps and walks over to the bar, he stops when he spots me and then smirks, "Well hello there barkeep, you seem so familiar."

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A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Wow, thank you for all of the reviews and alerts. This is pre-written so there will be one chapter every day until the end. And this whole story is heavily influenced by the bad romance novels I read as a teen, you have been warned.


	3. Chapter 3

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

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**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**03**

Looking through him I don't bother smiling, "What drink do you want?"

"Now is that anyway to talk to a customer and loyal patron?" His smirk makes me want to slap him.

"What drink do you want Sebastian?" Is my only reply.

"Really Kurt you used to be so much more fun, you scratched back so magnificently," he actually flutters his eyelashes at me, "What did New York do to you? I thought you'd be so much more bitchy from going there and honing your skills."

Stiffening I wave to Dog and point to Sebastian, and then I walk off to gather up glasses and bottles left on tables and the sides of the dance floor. Dog serves the brats, all of them, and I tidy up.

Job done my bar is meerkat free and I carry on serving drinks. One of the regulars likes a particular type of cocktail and insists on a show since he learnt I can do it. I have to measure and mix while throwing the bottles and the metal drink mixer. I pour with a flourish and a bow.

It gets a scattering of applause, I wash the mixer out and catch sight of Sebastian staring at me, my stomach tightens when he tips his glass at me so I frown at him and ignore him.

He'll be gone soon.

"One beer and one lemonade please," a very familiar and much loved voice orders and I look up to see David Karofsky grinning at me, Kyle hanging over his shoulder.

"David, Kyle, you're early," I beam at them grabbing the beer for Kyle and a lemonade for David. "Welcome back," I hurry round the bar to hug them but David holds his hand up and then there's a small gold coloured envelope with a ribbon on it.

Taking it from him, and wondering what the romantic teddy bear's been up to this time, I flip it over to see my name in beautiful flowing calligraphy that can only be Kyle's handiwork.

Untying the ribbon I open up the edges to see wedding bells and the words "David Jefferson Karofsky and Kyle Romeo Allen cordially invite you to the Special Day of their Wedding…" I don't get any further as I break off in shock to stare at them then I start jumping up and down and screaming.

Flapping my hands I jump at them and hug them both, "Oh god, guys, guys when?" Going back to reading it I pick out the highlights, "New York next year, oh my god what am I going to wear? What colour theme are you going with? I can't clash with you, oh god, guys!"

They exchange a look and then Kyle hands ten bucks over to David, "Alright what was that about?" I demand.

"Dave said you'd flap, get overly emotional, worry about your clothes and be ridiculously happy for us," Kyle drawls dryly.

"Why wouldn't I be happy for you?" I frown carefully skirting the rest.

I don't often see that lost look in Kyle's eyes anymore, David's dad still talks to him, but Kyle's family have cut him off completely, he's dead to them. Jutting his jaw out Kyle keeps his gaze steady on mine, "When I finally plucked up the courage to ask Dave to marry me and after the amazing 'acceptance of the proposal' sex the only thing we both wanted to do was come and tell you, in person, with the one and only invite that currently exists. We wanted our family to know first."

"I have the first invite?" I clutch the invite and then blink, "Kyle! TMI! And… Oh," My hands flap on their own, "Family? Really? Oh god," I grab Kyle and David's laughing at me as I hug his fiancé to death.

They stay for another hour nursing their drinks, they know where the spare key is they'll crash in the guest room, they make me promise not to tell anyone, they want to be the ones to break it to everyone.

Waving to them as they walk out hand in hand I hold the card over my heart, I'm so pleased for them and I hug the invite as I bust a dance move to slip behind the bar beaming at everyone or anything in view, apart from Sebastian.

The same Sebastian who walks over drink in hand, "Who was that with Dave?"

"That's none of your business," I snipe.

"Kurt, please," he had the same face on when he proposed a truce after David's attempt, and I pause leaning forward and looking about, there's only the boy in hearing distance.

"That's Kyle, David's fiancé, they've just gotten engaged!" I squeal as quietly as I can.

Stunned the man sits there and a rare soft smile crosses his face, "David Karofsky's getting married!"

Luckily my arm is in the way and protects the invite as the high school boy's just spat his drink over us, ew. "That was Dave Karofsky? You know?" He mimes a rope by his neck and Sebastian frowns clearly getting angry.

Touching Sebastian's arm to divert him my fingers tingle as I smile at the teen, "Yes Brian that was David Karofsky. A boy who went off to college, aced his degree, found an amazing and hot boyfriend and is now ridiculously happy. A man who's wedding I'm invited to."

"Oh," the boy says, "He really made it…"

"He really made it," I state firmly, maybe seeing someone else getting to be happy will help him.

"Thank you Mr Hummel," the boy puts the empty bottle on the bar, "I should be getting home, I have sports tomorrow."

"You're welcome Brian, and drive safely, remember the numbers I gave you, if you need to talk…"

"I will thank you," and the boy's gone.

Happy for David but worried for Brian I rub the warm fabric under my fingers and then I'm startled when it moves and I'm holding a hand. Stupidly I look down to see a hand really is holding mine and then I follow it up to see Sebastian looking back at me.

Oh.

Jerking my hand out of his I mumble, "Sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry about Tiger," his voice drops a little.

"Hey Seb, we're off man, you coming, there's gotta be somewhere round here with chicks dude, you might like chasing dick but the rest of us need something else," one of his friends claps him on the shoulder and 'Seb' is not happy with the man. "Give this one up as a tough nut to crack, he's never gonna bend over for you, you need to get back on your game you've been too quiet and celibacy for a year can't be good for you."

"Whatever," Sebastian shrugs him off, "By all means lets find you somewhere you can flirt." He leans over the bar to me, "Just one question? Why are you behind the bar and acting like you belong there?"

"Because I work here Sebastian," I tell him, I have for years, the pay is abysmal but the people are nice.

"Hmm, see you later Kurt," he smirks and then I am officially free of him.

The night passes quickly, I help clear up, it doesn't take long, the owner's view of cleanliness is poles apart from mine. I refuse to use the men's toilet when I'm here and will only use the small ladies' toilet that's tucked away because I clean it on a regular basis.

Driving home I yawn and creep into the house. David and Kyle's car is parked outside the house, a few mugs are drying by the sink, and I lock up to go and fall onto my bed so excited and happy for them.

Tomorrow morning I'm going to pester them until they give up and let me hijack the wedding, it's going to be the most perfect day for them.

Smiling I cuddle into my covers glad to have something to look forward to in my life.

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A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	4. Chapter 4

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**04**

The great thing about summer is it's hot and I won't freeze to death without a coat. The bad thing about summer is it's hot and I often want to melt.

Case in point, the garage. We have all the doors open to catch the slightest hint of breeze, the fans are on in the main garage area, but I've been stuck in the back room doing inventory on the tyres and putting a big order away. Nothing like manhandling heavy round rubber rings to work up a sweat.

My hands are swimming in the gloves I insist on wearing. I might have pared down my skin care but I refuse to get grease and dirt stuck under my fingernails.

With the last tyre safely stored away I wander into the main area to see the damn college brats, they're talking to Frank. Not wanting anything to do with them I head for the office, I'm at the threshold of safety when I hear Sebastian shout, "Kurt? What are you doing here?"

"I work here," I keep going and slip into the office shutting the door.

Behind on paperwork I enjoy the cooling fan on the desk and pick up a pile of invoices, I swear this stuff breeds when it's put in the in tray. Entering them on the computer I sigh as someone taps on the office door.

It's Frank, "Sorry to disturb you boss, but we got Mr Pain in the Ass here."

Oh joy. Mr 'Homophobic and will make comments while you tinker in the guts of his car so you could theoretically kill him and make it look like an accident' is the bane of every garage in a fifty-mile radius. He threw a fit when I was denied my closet, so everyone thought I'd come out as gay as a teen, he went to every other garage in the area, hated them, and came back determined to get his car done to a much higher standard and continue to lambaste me into a better more godly attitude with my sexual orientation.

We have a hate hate relationship. And lately I've taken to playing up to the stereotypical image of a gay guy just to rile him up. It gives me a break from my everyday life as the sweet nice guy.

Shrugging the arms of my overalls off my shoulders I tie them around my trim flat waist, then I take the normal t-shirt I was wearing off and replace it with my emergency sleeveless far too tight bright blue t-shirt.

Ruffling my hair and resisting the urge to pat it back into place I grab a water bottle and uncap it. Sauntering into the garage I take my time downing half the water and resting the ice-cold bottle against my neck.

Then I swagger and prance all the way over to Mr 'annoying me by breathing the same air as me' and in my most breathy girly voice I ask, "And what seems to be the problem with the car today Mr Paris?" Urgh I can't believe someone with the last name of such a magnificent city could be like this but he is.

"Well, Kurt, have you changed your heathen and ungodly ways?" He thunders, and I've noticed the radio's been turned right down, honestly I hope the guys don't snigger through this, they nearly spoilt it last time.

"No Mr Paris, still very gay and into guys," I act as sweetly as I can and try to remember that hitting him with a tyre iron counts as assault.

He hurpms at me and then points to the back seats of the car, "It smells."

"It smells," I repeat unbelievingly.

"Yes, there's this horrible smell in the back of the car and has been since the weekend," He crosses his arms and I wonder if I can get him to stand in front of the car as I run him over, purely to test the suspension.

Opening the back door the smell hits me, it's vomit and pot and alcohol. Oh and I've spotted a discarded condom wrapper. "You have a teenage son don't you?"

Mr Paris beams, "My pride and joy, a wonderful young man, so honest and devout, it's been an honour to watch him grow and guide his steps into his bludgeoning manhood."

"Yes, you may not want him to borrow the car again, because someone's been sick in it, smoked pot, drunk alcohol and had sex in the backseat…"

"How dare you!" He draws himself up and I've had enough of this pompous ass. "You might be a ungodly sexually promiscuous homo who will sleep with anything for a moment of joy in your otherwise desolate existence, but you can't go around smearing good people with such lies."

"MR PARIS!" I rarely raise my voice, "Your son is a hormonal driven teenage boy I have had the misfortune of running into while helping coach cheerleading practice, he is always openly hitting on the girls and calling them sluts to their faces, he has even been known to boast about picking up drunken girls and screwing them while they're unconscious."

"I…I… Have never been so insulted, your father will hear about this…" The man says.

"I haven't finished, you are more than welcome to tell my dad about this, but since he's left me in charge of Hummel's Tyre and Lube I doubt you will get much sympathy. Plus calling me a slut to him is liable to get you kicked out of his office. He is well aware of the fact that I have only had two lovers in my life, and that I have not been sexually active for over four years."

Pointing at the garage door I tell him, "Please take your car and leave Mr Paris. I suggest you talk to your son before he develops a drug and alcohol problem or catches a sexual transmitted disease. Oh and for the car I would take it to be cleaned and disinfected thoroughly inside and out. GoodBYE Mr Paris, should you wish to darken our doors with your presence please feel free to embrace your Christian spirit and spread good will, joy and forgiveness.

"Now if you excuse me I have a business to run," I stalk off inwardly raging and leaving the man gaping like a fish behind me.

So of course that's when I notice Sebastian lounging to one side as his friend's car is being fixed, how does he manage to give off those vibes, he throws me a wink I ignore and I go and hide in the office again hoping my stomach will stop tightening like that every time I see him.

Losing myself in the invoices and computer system I get another tap on the door, "Hey boss, card sale," I wave Frank over to the card reader and then glance up to see Sebastian wandering in and over to me like he owns the place.

Perching on the edge of the desk the very annoying horse teethed delinquent smirks at me, "So over four years is a long time to do without Tiger."

"Some of us have brains that aren't positioned between our legs, I'm sure I'll survive," I try and zone him out mentally berating myself for letting him find out about that.

"You know I'm always here to help you blow off some of that steam," his hand rests on my desk and I want to smack it off.

"Sebastian, as fun as it was to count the numerous freckles on your body, I have to say I found your morning after care a lot be desired, if I ever need my self esteem and ego stabbed to death again I'll be sure to look you up," I hiss and the sale's gone through so I usher them all out of my office.

"Just one last question," the damnable man leans on the doorframe jamming his foot in the way of the door, "If Blaine's lover number one, who's number two?"

Of all the conceited idiots, I'm ready to start ramming the door into the side of his foot but I smile sweetly, "Why Sebastian, surely you realise I'm counting you as number two."

He looks surprised, "Really? It was a one-night stand. And there's been no one else since?"

At least he's moved so I grace him with an answer, "Well I've always counted it, poor naive little me, and since you ruined me for any other man in the world, because you have single-handedly put me off men for life, there really hasn't been anyone else. So run along and go do something adventurous," I throw in his face, I doubt he remembers what he said that morning, it's satisfying to slam the office door in his face and then lock the door.

With amazing timing my phone starts ringing and I smile when I see Tina's name on it, she'll be a wonderful distraction from my memories.

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A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	5. Chapter 5

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**05**

Five minutes.

Just five more minutes until the end of my shift at the Lima Bean. The others have been turning up in Lima over the last few days and we're having an impromptu engagement party for David and Kyle. We've yet to inform the happy couple of the bigger more formal party, we'll just surprise them at the barbeque, that'll be much more fun.

"Tiger," an unwelcome voice purrs and Sebastian's leaning on the counter, damn him, why is he still in Lima? Shouldn't he be off raising hell somewhere else?

"What do you want?" I don't see why I have to be friendly to him.

"You really need to work on that customer service charm," he says helpfully, "As fun as it was to see you rip into that homophobic moron you might try being pleasant to customers, you do after all catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."

Without looking at him I tap in an order, one that I annoyingly remember, and then ask for payment. Quirking an eyebrow at me he pays, as he moves down to the other end of the counter I input his name as 'Meerkat'.

Shift over with I hand over to Debra, snag my own coffee on the way out from behind the counter and get to see Sebastian reading the name scribbled on his coffee cup, he tilts it towards me and I almost skip to my friends feeling like I just won something.

We're still missing half of them but most of us are here and they all know about David and Kyle. And the surprise party.

A shadow falls on the table and Blaine glances up to frown, "Hello Sebastian, strange I'm having this deja-vu moment, like this has all happened before," there's barely concealed dislike, though I know for a fact that Blaine gave into his charms for a single night during their senior year. Blaine says he was not impressed, that Sebastian was on and off and then gone. I'd nodded understandingly, and yet at the same time confused, as my own drunken recollection had us doing a lot more than that and yes I did try and trace his freckles but ended up kissing and licking them instead as he'd writhed under me.

"Blaine," Sebastian's voice is biting, "Congratulations for graduating NYADA, I hear you have several auditions lined up already."

"Why thank you Sebastian," Blaine replies, I'm sure I could etch diamonds with that tone, "Things are going well for me, I'm very fortunate. I'd ask after your life but I really don't care."

"Fun Blainers, but I was here for Dave actually, there are certain rumours flying around Lima and I wanted to congratulate you," Sebastian's smooth and doesn't give away that I blabbed to him. "I'm glad you made it, may you have a wonderful life together."

That earns him a nod from David, "Thank you."

Out of the corner of my eye I can see a group of juniors acting suspiciously so I bark out, "Girls! I can see what you're doing, don't make me report you."

Guiltily they stop whatever they're doing and one of them squeaks, "Yes Mr Hummel, I mean no Mr Hummel, sorry Mr Hummel."

"Buzzkill," Puck murmurs and the others grin.

"Oh I don't know," Sebastian drawls, "It's kinda hot when he gets all bossy like that, but seriously still wide open for you Tiger," he tops it off with a wink.

Blaine's face is a picture, David chokes on his coffee, and the others all turn to stare at me, damn you face for getting hotter, "I'll bear that in mind should every other guy on the face of the planet and most of the women keel over dead."

It only makes him laugh at me.

"So one more question," he says and I sigh, "Why were you behind the counter taking orders?"

He really is determined to make me suffer, he knows all this, my dad talks to his occasionally at functions, one of the perils of public office, I know Sebastian switched majors to English Lit, that he's working on being a writer and has several short works published already. He still sings but as more of a hobby.

"I work here Sebastian," I growl out.

"So you work in Scandals behind the bar, by the way amazing show on the cocktail mixing. You work in a garage, wearing hot little numbers of overalls and skintight blue Ts. And you help make divine coffee. I'm a little shocked you're doing all this though, shouldn't you be resting from your big Broadway shows?"

I really do flinch this time.

"Get out," Blaine slowly gets to his feet, the other guys mimicking him, "You are one cold bastard Sebastian, you know he never went to college, he never went to NYADA, stop being so cruel to him."

"What? Of course he went," Sebastian argues back, "Everything was about him going to that college, New Directions came in first at Nationals, it was a perfect leg up to get in."

He seems genuinely shocked, maybe he didn't know.

"There was only one final place left open for candidates," I tell him softly, "It came down to me or Rachel."

"What and they picked her?" He's not happy at the thought and it makes me smile.

"Yes strange as it may seem they picked her," just like they always do.

"But…" he can't seem to get his head wrapped around it.

"I still can't believe you went out without me and got drunk when you found out about it," Finn grumbles and I stiffen in my seat and brainstorm how to make the idiot shut up. "It's only the second time you've ever gotten drunk in your life, I should have been there to take care of you, to make sure you were okay, you were hurt and vulnerable."

Averting my eyes from Sebastian it seems my brother has decided to shut up when David says, "Nah, it's cool there, Scandals is pretty safe, plus he'd totally booked his cab in advance, no drink driving."

Oh god.

And Blaine destroys what's left of my dignity by adding, "And don't forget he had a hotel room, with hangover remedies, new clothes and a pre-booked cab to pick him up in the morning," sitting back down Blaine reaches out to touch one of my hands on the table, "You know Kurt, he's so very sensible, mature, he wouldn't do anything silly, he's not the most spontaneous of guys," my hand gets squeezed.

Against my will my eyes drift up to Sebastian who's staring at me thoughtfully, oh please don't let him work it out, it's a vain thought.

Suddenly his phone rings and I'm saved.

"Hello," he answers it, "Oh, yes I know, I know, really I hadn't realised, I was picking up coffee, what? Fine," he huffs and ends the call, "Well it's been so much fun, and Kurt? I'll see you around."

When I'm sure he's gone I breathe out and mutter, "I'm going to bug that man with a tracking device so I can avoid him."

"You're lucky," Blaine says, "At least you never slept with him," my ex shudders, "He really is all talk."

David agrees and I'd forgotten that Sebastian had slept with him one night of the summer David first came back from college. He's not impressed either. Kyle now believes the stories of Sebastian Smythe and comforts David, not that he needs it but David laps up the attention.

And I want someone to do that for me.

Changing the conversation I push the man with the many freckles out of my mind and catch up with my friends.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Yes I know another job for Kurt, but he's trying so hard to bury himself in work and not think or feel...


	6. Chapter 6

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**06**

Not all the students at Dalton get to go home in summer, that's the great thing about a boarding school, you can have children and then you can get rid of them for months, if not years, at a time. Then one day this adult will appear, go to college and then have their own life with the minimum of fuss to you.

People really confuse me, why have kids if that's all you're going to do? What's the point?

Each summer I've taken to coming over to help give them new experiences, like the funfair. Opening up the school bus door I stand there as they stream out tired and full of far too much sugar.

Blaine is laughing with one of them, the boy is a Warbler and he's gazing at Blaine with hero-worshipping adoration.

I notice no one does that to me.

I put the time and effort in and they take me for granted.

Herding them up to the main door, and the waiting staff, each of them is signed in and they scamper off into the depths of the building to sit far away from the summer sun and log on to social networking sites everywhere.

Oh to be young again.

Trailing through the mostly empty halls I remember being happy, and young, and foolish here. Walking into the deserted Warbler common room I smile to myself as I can still see the ghosts of my past tiptoe past me.

What was that song Mr Schue sang at the end of our first year in glee? Oh now I know and I start to sing about somewhere over a rainbow way up high. I'm rusty, I'll have to start doing vocal practices, it's been years since I last sang. Running the music through my head I dance slowly around the room and come to a halt at the end letting myself fall into a handy couch.

Someone claps and I startle. Why am I not surprised to see Sebastian there? He smiles at me and saunters in to sit on the other sofa, he lounges with ease his t-shirt riding up a little to hint that a tiny movement more would display his stomach.

Not that I'm interested.

And the thought of seeing him shirtless makes my own stomach roll, but in a good way.

"I'd ask what you're doing here but I'm sure the answer is you work here," Sebastian says teasingly.

"Well then you'd be wrong," I correct him haughtily, "I volunteer here."

"Oh you volunteer…" He's smirking again.

Flushing under his mocking that isn't really mocking I ask him, "So now you know what I'm doing here, what are you doing here?"

"So glad you're taking an interest in me Tiger," I stiffen and mentally kick myself, "Since you asked, I'm here to…"

"Sebastian," It's Blaine with Harry, another Warbler, one tipped to be on the council next year.

"Blaine," Sebastian greets him coldly, "Still addicted to bowties I see," and Blaine has always been addicted to bowties, "Did you get lost or something?" Sebastian drawls, "I'm sure you left here long ago, or were you throwing another impromptu choir practice for your fawning Warbler fans?"

Glaring at his fellow ex-Warbler Blaine gestures to me, "Come on Kurt, everything's wrapped up here, and Harry you must have heard Sebastian singing just now, he used to solo occasionally back in the days when he stole the power from the council."

Now Sebastian's glaring daggers at Blaine while poor Harry swallows nervously, "You mean he's THE Sebastian Smythe."

Strangely that mollifies Sebastian as I add, "Oh there really is only one Sebastian Smythe."

Winking at me Sebastian shows off almost flipping to his feet and sauntering over to me, "Tiger it seems I did make a lasting impression on you," he holds his hand out to help me up.

Gracefully getting to my own feet I disregard his hand, "Sebastian, who could anyone possibly forget you without extreme therapy?"

His grin gets wider and more predatory as he steps closer, "If you want I could help you with that," his hand lands on my shoulder, I hide the gasp I was going to make and act bored, "I've heard music helps sooth many things, sing with me, dance with me…"

"Oh let me guess," I break in, "You'll rock my world?" Harry gasps and I slide away from Sebastian, "Sorry Sebastian a little too busy respecting myself."

Leaving him in the common room I walk Harry to that staircase with Blaine, and as the boy runs up the stairs he stops halfway, "Mr Hummel, are you going to be okay?"

"I'm going to be fine Harry, why do you ask?" It's sweet but confusing.

"Because he was rude to you and he hit on you," The complete astonishment at someone hitting on me is hard to take.

"I'm sure I'll be fine, thank you," I force a smile.

"Good, because you can do so much better than someone like him Mr Hummel, you deserve a prince of a man," and then Harry's scampering off as I smile sadly, I stopped believing in princes long ago, after my one left me for being a frog.

"He's right you know," Blaine says and touches my hand tugging on it so I twirl and duck under our arms imitating dancing, "You deserve a man worthy of you. Don't fall for Sebastian's charms, I know it's been a while for you, but he'll be on and off in minutes," my ex frowns, "I really regret that night, I'm just glad you never had him sniffing around you when he was a teen."

"Are you saying I couldn't handle him?" I'm a little miffed and push the memory of Sebastian kissing me in the hotel right out of my mind.

"No, of course not," and Blaine's instantly patting my hand, "It's just you're so sweet and nice, he's nothing but a scoundrel, he wouldn't understand you need more gentle handling, that you're delicate, sheltered."

"I'm not a girl Blaine," I bite back.

"Yes but you believe there's nothing sexier than the touch of fingertips, you believe in love Kurt, you adore romance, and you've been locked up in that ivory tower of yours for years," Blaine pulls me into a hug. "Don't be mad at me, Kurt, I do care for you."

"I care about you too Blaine," I hug him back.

"And the nerve of Sebastian singing to you, he must know you've not sung in years, he really doesn't know how to be pleasant to anyone," Blaine's hand rubs my back, "I hope it didn't hurt too much when he did that to you. My poor little Kurt, lets get you home and you can tuck yourself up with a set of your Disney movies, you can see true love conquer all."

He steps back and thankfully he misses me wrinkling my nose, "Am I really that predictable?"

"You've always been that predictable Kurt, you were always so easy to please when we dated, I'll be forever grateful to have been loved by you," his voice throbs with sincerity and I roll my eyes.

Only to see Sebastian leaning against a doorway out of sight of Blaine and grinning at me, he blows a kiss to me, turning my back on him I march out of Dalton talking to Blaine and planning to ditch the Disney movies for anything else, even the dreaded video games.

Kurt Hummel can't be that predictable, he's a free spirit, he can be daring and spontaneous and fun.

My resolve lasts until I get home and then my family and friends all gang up on me and I'm stuck watching the damn Disney film while they coo lovingly over me.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Thank you so much for all the lovely alerts and reviews, I am happily gloating over them, but I feel kinda bad too. This fiction is somewhat based on really bad romance novels, there won't be a huge amount of plot, and there will be parts that don't make a huge amount of sense and some of Kurt's actions will be a bit far fetched (hey it's bad romance).

I may also need to point out that Kurt never told anyone about his night with Sebastian, they just think he got drunk, went to the hotel, slept it off, came home and then did his normal Kurt thing of pushing people away and claming up. His family and friends dropped the ball big time on this, Kurt really needed someone and they weren't there for him believing he'd bounce back and then come up fighting, instead he kind of went to sleep and so Lima has had the joy of a very quiet, calm, gentle, sweet Kurt Hummel for about 5 years. He just needs something to kick-start him into waking up…


	7. Chapter 7

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**07**

Once again Principal Figgins has managed to pull off a fund raising occasion with the cheapest budget and the least amount of fun he could find.

The threadbare assortment of tents proclaiming fun for all are scattered about the football field. Here the school is attempting to bilk the public of any funds it possibly can. There are lemonade stands, food stalls selling heart attacks in a bun, the jocks are throwing balls at tin cans to win dodgy plushy toys for their sweethearts, boys of all types throng the arcade area to shoot zombie hoards rather than sit at home and shoot them for free, oh I was wrong, boys of all types and some girls are doing that.

Of to one side the cheerios and glee club are in a stand off arguing who gets to go first entertaining the masses. Coach Sylvester is doing her best to push Mr Schue over the cliff of homicidal rage, while a very pregnant Miss Pillsbury, no its Mrs Schue now, tries to calm him down.

Avoiding the whole thing I duck behind a tent and refuse to get involved, I help out at both clubs I don't want her mad at me, and I don't want Mr Schue being all clingy and self absorbed at me.

Of course I can call them by their first names now, it's just a habit I find hard break, and most of the kids call me Mr Hummel anyway, so I can get away with pretending it's a polite thing to do.

Furtive movements from some jocks and I follow them to where they have a tiny freshman, soon to be sophomore, trapped. No matter how many times I try and get it through their thick skulls they still keep this behaviour up and it is not acceptable.

"Gentlemen," I project my voice, they spin around guilty at being caught. "I'm sure you have a perfectly innocent reason for all of this?"

They don't and their tiny little minds panic running in circles until one of them, oh joy it's Mr Paris' son steps up, "We don't have to take this from you homo," the others gasp and resemble bunnies in headlights, "You're not a real teacher, we don't have to do as you say, and you got my old man to ground me."

"Ah good old Mr Paris," I cross my arms, "How is your dad? I do hope you didn't disappoint him too much when he found you what you're really like. Are you by any chance grounded over the summer? Shame," I don't mean it, "Think of all those girls who can party without fear of you being a perverted creeper."

His friends snigger and he huffs taking a menacing step towards me, "Tiger," comes from behind me, oh no, not him, "Don't tell me, you either work here or you volunteer here."

"Hello Sebastian are you lost again? I'm sure you can find the exit route from Lima, it is signposted," I snark back bitchily and all the students including Mr Paris Jr stare at me wide eyed, they're used to mild mannered Kurt Hummel.

I turn my head to see Sebastian stepping up next to me, "But Kurt I live here now, inspiration for my new book, you do know I'm a writer don't you?"

In the sunlight you can really tell his eyes aren't brown, they have tiny brown streaks in them but they're green, "I am aware of it, congratulations Sebastian, though I'm shocked you have an occupation that isn't illegal and involves you not getting naked and then arrested."

Laughing at me he moves closer not quite touching me but close enough my stomach is dropping to the floor and my heart is kicking me painfully in the chest. "Oh Kurt," his eyes fall onto my mouth, "Such sweet things you say to me, I'd almost think you cared." His face leans in even closer crowding into my personal space. I refuse to back down to him and stand my ground.

Ready with a remark about oral hygiene and how he needs to be acquainted with it due to bad breath, a complete lie but it's all I can think of for now, I'm stopped by one of the jocks stunned exclamation, "Is he flirting with you Mr Hummel?" What is it with people and being shocked that someone would flirt with me?

Even if it is Sebastian.

Ah the joy of being the gay helper who doesn't date and leads a boring meaningless life, "Actually you'll find Sebastian's default setting is flirting, he doesn't mean a word of it."

"Oh," they all stare at us even Paris.

"Now why are you all still here?" I verbal swipe at them and they flee the scene. Shaking my head I go to the downed nerd, "Are you okay, do you want me to escort you to your parents or a group of friends?"

"Um, I think I'm okay Mr Hummel, but my friends are right on the other side of the field," he stands up and he's shaking slightly, I remember the after effects of bullying so I lead the boy to the nearest lemonade stand, pay the exorbitant price for a cup and hand it over, "Oh you don't need to…"

"Alex, please, it's for you, you should at least have something good happen after that experience, drink your lemonade and go have fun with your friends," I push the cup on him, technically I could get in trouble for that but it calms him down and when I drop him off at his friends he's stopped shaking.

"Thank you Mr Hummel," he runs off and I turn to leave only Sebastian steps into my way.

"Yes Mr Hummel that was very kind of you," the meerkat shudders, "I'd forgotten things like that happen in high school."

"I hadn't," I say quietly and go to step around him. He matches me and I sigh, "Sebastian please move."

"No, I thought we were either having a conversation or…" he grins, "A dance."

"Sebastian," I growl and put my sunglasses on to block him out, "Please move, I do not want to talk to you, I'll end up with a headache."

"Oh am I too sweet for you?" He tilts his head.

"Sour, you are too sour," he pouts at me. "As flattering as your attention is," I lie, kind of, "I have other things to do with my life, like put my heart in a food blender."

"Heart?" He frowns all traces of his smile gone.

"Hand, I said hand," I correct.

"Hmm," he lets it slide and then twists so he's standing next to me, "How about we walk and talk? I can even help you with your oh so important things to do, oh and Kurt?"

"What?" I grump wanting to get rid of him.

"Flirting is no longer my default setting, I think I'm growing up," he smirks at me and I'm baffled as to what to say next.

"Um…"

"So yes I was flirting with you, and you alone," he expands and I'm glad I'm wearing sunglass so he can't see me blink rapidly.

"And a question for you…" his grin vanishes, "Why did Blaine say you don't sing? I've heard you, I know you sing, a little high, but you should have gotten the NYADA spot."

"I haven't sung in years," I admit while trying to fend off how warm his comment at how I should have gotten the spot makes me.

"Why?" He presses.

"I didn't feel like singing," I shrug it off.

"So why sing in the Warbler common room?" he's not giving up.

"It reminded me of when I used to be happy," I go to step away but his hand catches my arm and I freeze in place at how warm his hand is, how warm his eyes are as they stare into my covered ones, and how warm I feel all over.

"What happened to you? What happened to the boy who dreamed so big he made the world sit up and take notice? What happened to the stars in your eyes? And why are you rotting away in this town? Why aren't you beating men off of you with sticks?"

"That's a lot of questions," I go to walk off but his hand is there, and I sigh, "Sometimes frogs can dream they're really a prince in disguise, but eventually they learn they really are frogs, and frogs don't get to dream or find love, they get to sit on lily pads all day and eat flies."

"Kurt," his hand lets go of my arm and reaches up to touch my face, "You're not a frog, you really are a prince, but a prince that clearly thinks he's a frog," he leans in closer, and for a mad moment I think he's going to kiss me.

"Hey homos," oh great it's Mr Paris Jr again.

Stepping back from Sebastian I turn to the annoying boy and get a face full of ice cold blue slushy bitch slapping me and it brings bad memories of high school tumbling back with a vengeance.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Oh dear I may have written Blaine a bit too OTT in this, I didn't mean to Blaine bash, but I've gone with him being fairly oblivious to Kurt and not really SEEing him when they were teens (at that age we don't tend to see everything after all), and he really didn't understand how devastating it was for Kurt when they broke up, plus Blaine's been off to college, lived in a big city (New York), and as Kurt hasn't, Blaine is being condescending, the fact Kurt runs a flourishing business on his own, helps with his dad's office in Lima (by being a go between sometimes for people), helps coach the cheerios, new directions and the warblers hasn't really occurred to Blaine, Kurt's grown up and matured and leant things (as you do) without Blaine really seeing it.


	8. Chapter 8

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**08**

Rooted to the spot I stand there in shock.

Icy rivulets run down my face, my sunglasses at least protected my eyes, and the slushy is rapidly heading south, I do not what that stuff in my underwear. Pulling my t-shirt up and off as quickly as I can I use the ruined garment to sop up the blue liquid on my torso. I pick my sunglasses off too to clean them.

Paris has his arms crossed defiantly and Sebastian is blowing up angrily beside me.

"Gregory!" And now I have the pleasure of Mr Paris senior.

"Dad…" the boy stumbles back as his dad storms over.

"Gregory, why did you just throw that at Kurt?" And Mr Paris doesn't look happy.

"Dad," the boy points at me, "The homos were about to kiss and there are kids about."

"Plus," Sebastian steps smoothly into the conversation as I get the last of the slushy before it crosses my equator line, "Kurt had caught your son bullying a boy earlier."

"Gregory!" Mr Paris whips around to glare at his son.

"Dad," Gregory whines, "I wouldn't do that."

Mr Paris apparently isn't buying it, "Home. Now. You're not only grounded for the rest of the summer you're going to extra bible classes to learn how to be nice to people and to learn not to lie to me."

"But Dad!" And the boy is dragged off.

"Urgh it's staining already," I complain and then realise everyone is staring at me and there are a lot of people to stare. Grabbing my wet t-shirt I hold it protectively in front of me.

"Kurt," It's Tina, "Here I have wipes," Mercedes is there too and wolf whistles me as they rub my chest and stomach.

"Mercedes," I gripe, "Please don't objectify me."

"Hard not too when you're that toned boo, when did you muscle up so much, you were a bit skinny in high school," she sasses me.

"I work in a garage, I lift things all day, heavy things," I eye her up, "You're not going to pitch a rock through my windshield are you?"

She laughs, "No baby, here do your face, we'll find you something else to wear sweetie."

Rubbing my face with a wipe I jump and tense when Sebastian taps me on the shoulder, "You can borrow my t-shirt, I can wear my shirt."

"Um," I'm going to tell him no, I really am, but he slides out of his shirt and then tugs the soft faded blue material of his t-shirt up and off of his body. His freckled body. The freckles that I trace with my eyes down his body and I remember go under his jeans.

Fingers snap in front of my face, "I'm up here Kurt, but if you want to objectify me just let me know Tiger."

Snatching the t-shirt from him I huff as I jam it over my head and pray I've got it the right way round. The material is thin and stretchy. And oh god my nipples just got hard.

I smooth the t-shirt down and then realise, "Hey my biceps are bigger than yours."

Taking that as an invitation his hand lands on one of mine, "Interesting, we can go somewhere more private to explore all the differences if you want?"

"No Sebastian, I was just…" And everyone is staring at us again, "Never mind."

Removing his hand he starts buttoning up his shirt and hiding the freckles from me, "That's too bad Tiger, I'll see you later, oh and I want my t-shirt back, freshly laundered with love."

"I'll just use detergent like everyone else," I tell him and he walks off pushing through the crowd.

Mercedes is glaring at me, "No, just no Kurt!"

"What?" I'm confused.

She leans in and stares at my eyes, "Oh dear too late, Tina we need to buy in emergency ice-cream."

"Got it," the woman nods.

"What?" They don't say anything but drag me off as the crowd murmurs and I can hear the rumour mill starting already. They're going to be disappointed when Sebastian leaves Lima with nothing happening between us except for verbal fighting.

Now it's all over the others all turn up and fuss over me, "I'm fine," I snap at them.

"Kurt," Blaine gives me puppy eyes and I sigh, "We're just worried about you, and if you got slushied who's top is that?"

"It's Sebastian's he was nice enough to lend it to me," I tell him.

"What!" Several people yell.

"I have a new career path for Kurt," Mercedes butts in to save me, "Topless model."

"Mercedes!" I squeak.

She brandishes her phone and the ladies and Sam and Puck all look. I get several comments from them and pretend to be mortally offended but I'm secretly pleased I'm not a total frog.

"If you've all finished," I stalk off as the announcement of entertainment is made. Hiding behind the stage I encourage the cheerios and the glee club helping with their pre show nerves.

I don't spot Sebastian in the crowd.

Not that I was looking but I'm disappointed he's not there.

Well he'll be gone from Lima soon enough and the idea isn't as comforting as it should be.

Fundraiser over with, I go home with my family and bustle about after an eventful day. Early indicators point to us having enough money for toilet paper at school this year.

"Is there you something you want to tell me son," Dad's standing there, he'd been in a huddle with Mercedes and Tina before we drove home.

"No," I frown at him, "Should there be?" I run through a mental list of things I've done recently and everything has been fine at the shop.

"I know I'm not always good with these guy problems and frankly there's only ever really been Blaine, but I'm here for you," he starts.

"What about Blaine?"

Silently he stares at me and then sighs, "Just, when you're ready, okay?"

"Okay…" Maybe I should talk to Carole about him, he's been under a lot of stress, yes I'll talk to her soon.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Again, thank you for all the lovely reviews and alerts, I'm loving every single one of them... :)


	9. Chapter 9

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**09**

For the last five days I've been expecting him and I don't know why. It's not like I've had the chance to wash his t-shirt because I've been too busy wearing it at night.

Nights that have been restless and full of those types of dreams that leave me trembling and shaky before I dash to the bathroom to take care of a certain problem.

Setting everyone up for an evening at the cinema I bounce along chatting and strangely anxious.

Because I'm looking for him I spot him quickly, he's queuing up for popcorn. My stomach flips and I press a hand against it.

Deciding on a film we can all enjoy, I'm happy as it has a certain Ryan Reynolds shirtless for a few scenes, it's for artistic reasons, and plot continuation, I'm sure of it.

Not interested in the sugary drinks or the badly made full fat popcorn I stand with David as they others go for treats, "Having a fiancé is handy," he's saying, "Means he's happy getting stuff for me."

"That's nice," I reply absently scanning the crowd, where could he have gone?

"Tiger," oh, he's behind me.

"Sebastian, fancy seeing you here," I act surprised as if I hadn't already spotted him a few minutes ago.

"I'm starting to think it's more than coincidence," he moves around to lean on the handy pillar nearby.

"Oh?" I arch a brow at him.

Shaking his head he says, "You know stalking me could get you into trouble Tiger."

"Me!" I yell at him, "You're the one who keeps coming up to talk to me Sebastian," my hands settle on my hips, "I was here in the town first, I've been here longer, and you have come into three places I work and two I volunteer at. How is that me stalking you?"

"Well when you put it like that," he says, "I suppose only the supermarket and the cinema counts, oh you're here to see that new movie with Ryan Reynolds' in aren't you?"

"What of it?" I flush and he catches me.

"You really shouldn't objectify people Kurt," my words get used against me.

"I wasn't," I'm rapidly ending up on the back foot of this conversation. "Anyway I didn't pick the film, I'm here to keep my friends and family company."

"How noble," he sips at his giant cup of soda.

"And what are you here to see?" I ask him, there isn't a film with two guys getting involved that way so I have no idea what he'd want to watch.

"That new Ryan Reynolds one, he gets his shirt off for two whole scenes," Sebastian says calmly.

"But… You…" I flounder.

And then David laughs.

"What?" I snarl.

"Nothing Kurt, only that this is really funny and for a smart guy you can be pretty dense about what's in front of your face." Turning to Sebastian David says, "Flowers, always lead with flowers. And I know he and Blaine broke up and Blaine lived, but sometimes things happen and things fall apart, but if Blaine had done something bad Burt woulda hunted him down and they'd never have found the body."

"Was that a threat?" Sebastian's scowling.

"Nope," David stands up and goes to leave, "Just a word of advice because Kurt is totally worth making happy."

"Agreed," they share a nod.

"What?" I'm left standing there confused.

"Come on Kurt," David slings an arm around me, "We got a movie to see, you can talk to Sebastian another day, bye dude."

"Bye Dave, bye tiger," Sebastian calls to us.

Huffing I go into the movie but I'm so busy looking for Sebastian that Finn taps me on the shoulder, "Hey bro, you okay 'coz you're wiggling around, you don't have a rash do you?"

David starts sniggering and he's close enough I can flick his ear, "Ow, Kurt that was mean."

Sulking I wait for the cinema to go dark and try to enjoy the film and yes Ryan Reynolds should go shirtless more often, and move to Lima, and somehow change his sexual orientation while falling at my feet, but I bet he doesn't have freckles.

No.

Stop thinking about the freckles.

At last the credits roll and the lights come up, I twist around and there he is only two rows away, he winks at me and I blush even as we all leave, I turn to see him one more time and he's still seated.

"Urgh," Finn grunts, "It's that douche Sebastian."

"Is it? I hadn't noticed," I try and cover but David sniggers again and Mercedes and Tina sigh, I don't appear to be fooling them.

"Come on Kurt," Mercedes and Tina sandwich me between them, and Mercedes kisses my cheek, "Remember I'm here for you sweetie."

"Huh?" Finn's head is swinging back and forth and then he goes, "No! No, just no."

"Too late," David pats him on the shoulder, "Way too late for that."

"But… But…" He huffs and drags me into a hug, "Bro I love you, just remember I love you, what ever you do don't run towards the light."

"Thank you," I wiggle out of his embrace, "Should I fall into a coma I will take that advice to heart Finn, until then shall we go to the Dairy Queen?"

"Seconded," Mercedes says and we leave.

I look back one more time as we reach the exit of the foyer and Sebastian is strolling along without a care in the world he waves at me and I jerk my eyes forward.

"Seriously bro," Finn hisses, "Still here for you, no matter what."

"Thank you," I smile at him, he's a goof but a sweet goof.

At the Dairy Queen I pick something small and we maul the film to death, it was good and we all liked it.

Going home Finn rushes past me and almost tramples me into the rose bushes, inside he's talking to dad who's nodding, "We already know, we just have to wait and hope."

They're all crazy.

And I start to scheme to find out what it is they're all being crazy about and why David laughed at me in the cinema. What do they all think they know that I don't?

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	10. Chapter 10

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc… Sorry if you get a bit of whiplash from this chapter, but it's romance so please feel free to suspend all disbelief.

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**10**

It takes a few days to come up with a scheme and a target.

Trying to get information out of Finn is ridiculously easy, but trying to get information I can understand is a whole different matter. Finn logic is fine in small doses, so I'm not going to find out from him.

Mercedes and Tina have proved difficult and only tell me they have ice-cream and that they love me.

Similarly dad and Carole are out.

Which leaves me a smart weak link I can ruthlessly exploit. Plus I can bribe him with pancakes.

Having dressed early and batch cooked pancakes, which I've left in the kitchen to distract the other members of the house hold, I take a tray of pancakes, his favourite syrup, coffee just the way he and his boyfriend like it and innocently knock on the guest room door while Kyle's in the main bathroom taking a shower.

"It's open!" David calls out so I walk in with my tray of goodies.

"Morning David, morning Kyle," I sing song at them, even though only David's there. My master plan is working smoothly and David happily accepts my offerings as I perch on the bed and mention, "So David…"

His fork hovers in the air and he studies me, "Okay Kurt, I'm glad you're waking up and being more you but can you cut the crap and just get to the point," he puts the fork down, "I wanna know what it is you want before I eat your bribe."

"David," I acted shocked, "How could think such a thing, I only made you and Kyle a nice breakfast in bed because I'm so happy to see you both and you brought me the very first invite…"

"Uh-huh, not buying it dude, so spill," he crosses his arms. Damn, the thing about David is he can be too smart for his own good.

"Fine," I huff, "I want to know what you were laughing about in the cinema."

He blinks, "That's it?" Waving at the tray, "Your entire scheme is to find out about one tiny little thing?"

"Yes, now tell me," I glare at him.

"Deal," David takes a big bite of pancake, "Oh man these are good," he sees me staring and tapping my foot, "Fine, you're attracted to Sebastian Smythe."

"No I'm not," is my instant rejection and I blow up, "Why would I be attracted to that tall smirky meerkat with his smirks and cutting words and… David why are you laughing at me?"

"You're just too funny," he almost chokes on his coffee, "Kurt will you calm the fuck down and think about how you feel around him."

"Annoyed," I snark at him and then blink as I realise what he's trying to say, the strange flutters in the stomach, the way I'm looking for him, the dreams about our night in the hotel, the warmth when he flirted with me. "Oh. Oh that's not good, that's not good at all."

Sighing he goes back to his pancakes, "David stop eating and help me."

Pointing with his fork he mumbles, "You said that was all I had to do, no one mentioned helping you, the pancakes are mine."

Crossing my arms I flare up, "David! That's not a helpful attitude, how am I supposed to deal with Sebastian if every time I see him from now on I'm aware that I'm attracted to his chipmunkiness, how am I supposed to hide it from him? What if I zone out gazing at his freckles and say something?"

"Freckles?" David stabs another piece of his breakfast, "I don't think I wanna know about your kinks man."

Throwing my hands up in the air I make a frustrated sound and collapse onto their bed, "You're no help at all, and after I helped you with Kyle, supported you, encouraged you, cheered at how happy you were and still are…" I peek to see if my guilt trip is working but he's calmly eating.

Laying there I sulk and stare at the ceiling, what is it with me and unattainable guys? First Finn, then Sam, then Blaine, even the minor crush I got on David, and to really top them all off Sebastian.

"Okay I'm finished now," David puts his fork down, "Those were great pancakes by the way," he sips his coffee. "Kurt you got two choices, ignore and avoid him until he goes away, or you ask him out and find out if you really do like him more than the physical."

"Ask him out?" I echo.

"Yeah, he's flirting with you and making it known he wants to spend time with you, whether that's more than naked time is something you're gonna have to find out."

Flushing I roll onto my side, "But what if he turns me down?" I pluck at the bed covers, I don't have a good track record with getting guys to like me.

"Then you have your answer and you can move on," he pauses and eyes me up, "Just one thing though Kurt, please don't back slide into the walking coma you've been in, will you please just get on with your life, because you've built a nice one here in Lima, you've proved to everyone that a gay girly guy can live here and can give so much more to the community than most of those religious or phobic nuts who profess to want to help people."

"What? I've not been in a coma, I think I would have noticed waking up in a hospital David," I point out.

"Really, so why the hell didn't you go to college, why haven't you dated, what the fuck happened to your clothes and your hair and your skin care routine? And when I got back from college I found this meek little thing that looked just like you living in this house," he counters.

"I… I don't know."

"Kurt, look little bro," I frown at him, "Don't give me that look, I'm older than you and using Finn's rule I'm taller than you so I'm the bigger brother, I know losing Blaine hurt you, and I know NYADA picking Rachel wrecked you, but I swear I woulda stayed back for a year and kicked your ass until you snapped out it so we coulda gone to college at the same time, and I'd still have Kyle in my life."

"David," I smile at him.

"So now that you've woken up sleeping beauty what'cha you gonna do with your life?" It's a serious question.

"I really haven't got a clue," I admit my mind blank.

"Okay what don't you want to do?" He changes tact.

"Broadway," I'm firm on that, "I don't want to live like Rachel and now Blaine, I like my job security, well as secure as anything is these days." Picking at the puzzle with my mind I tentatively say, "I like running the garage, it's fun, satisfying. The bar and the Lima Bean are okay, I only really do them for something to do."

"Well now you have a starting point," he drains his coffee mug.

"I…" hesitating I glance at him, "I really like helping out at the schools. McKinley's changing, slowly, it's getting better for the kids, the teachers are less apathetic."

"Dude the work you do there is awesome, I really wish there had been someone like you there at the time for me, someone I coulda slipped up to quietly, someone who might have listened and given me some help to stop being a complete and utter dick," he stops me before I say anything. "Kurt I was totally screwed up, frightened, confused, my life then is pretty much a how to manual of fucking up but I got a second chance to turn it around, I'm glad I did, my life is better than any dream. So if helping kids makes you happy go for it, even if it's part time, or volunteer work, or whatever the hell hours you want."

"Thanks," I get up, "I owe you, but I'm not bringing you breakfast in bed again."

"So what are you up to today?" He asks.

"Today I am going to be on the internet reading about all the night school classes and college courses that interest me, I've put college off for far too long, and then I'm going to go shopping for the engagement party I'm invited to, you remember me telling you about Mr Smythe senior proposing to his girlfriend? And I'm going to ask Sebastian out on a date when I get there."

A warm damp body hugs me from behind, I squeak as Kyle crows, "Woohoo, go Kurt."

"Kyle! How long were you there?" I demand.

"Long enough to know my man scored me breakfast in bed and I don't have to do a thing for it," the man says.

"Really?" Dave lifts an eyebrow, "I put in a lot of hard work honey, you should reward me, oh and Kurt? Can you close the door on your way out?"

Fleeing the room I leave with the sound of David's laughter in my ears and run to get my laptop eager to get started.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	11. Chapter 11

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**11**

It's one thing to say you're going to do something, but some of those somethings are harder than others. The college and night school idea is still a mess, I really don't know what I want to do, singing was once everything to me but since I was a teen I've discovered I really do enjoy working on cars, that I like helping kids, and a myriad of other interests.

I have summer to make my mind up and credits towards a degree are still credits, I don't really need to study to get a job, and it's freeing to be able to study to please myself.

Clothes.

That was harder than I thought, but I'm pleased with my conservative, yet well-tailored suit that I'm wearing tonight. I've even used a small amount of product to keep my hair out of my eyes.

Sebastian.

How do you ask someone out? It's something I've never done before. The movies make it seem easy but I'm having little freak-outs in the car as we drive to the Smythe residence, or mansion. I'm not completely convinced he likes me that way but David and Kyle's arguments have been compelling, and I know that I'm attracted to him so I'm going to try.

I've wracked my brains for information I remember about the meerkat and other than smirking, scheming and living in the Lima Bean all I have is France and speaking French. With that in mind I've come up with an idea for a date night with him, one that doesn't involve me getting more intimately acquainted with his freckles.

At least not too much.

Dad pulls up the drive and we park, climbing out the back I'm nearest Carole's door and open it for her offering my hand.

"Thank you dear," she says and then glances down at my hand, "Are you alright Kurt? You're hand's freezing."

"I'm fine Carole," I wave her fears away, no one but David and Kyle know what I'm going to be doing, this way if I go down in flames no one else needs to know.

Walking in, Mr Smythe and Julia, his wife to be, greet us. We've been here a few times, Mr Smythe is really nice and welcoming, Julia can be a bit standoffish but I wooed her with my knowledge of fashion labels and we hit it off really well. I'm not sure I approve of the fact she's only two years older than me, and I was shocked when I found out that Sebastian has three older brothers the youngest is fifteen years his senior.

All three of the brothers, with spouses, are there and all three of them became lawyers too, only Sebastian's bucked the trend to go and be a writer instead.

Speaking of Sebastian I glance around trying to be subtle but he's not there, that's strange, I frown and then I'm greeting the hosts and wishing them well in their future life.

We're dead on time so there aren't a huge number of people here, wandering through the house, well mansion, I'm glad I've been here before because otherwise I'd be hugging the rooms and whimpering over the interior decorating.

I find Sebastian at the bar that's been set up in the garden, "Hi," I say brightly and sit on the stool nearby.

He glares at me and sips his drink, the amber coloured liquid sloshing in his glass. His shoulders seem really tense and his eyes are a bit red.

The bartender asks me what I want and I chose, "A cranberry cutie cocktail please."

That confuses the man and I have to talk him through the ingredients of cranberry juice, apple juice, some honey and pouring the mix all over the ice cubes in a glass, I'm also disappointed I don't get a cherry on top.

Holding my glass out to Sebastian I try and get him to clink glasses instead he grunts angrily, "What do you want?"

"Um," oh god I can do this, David and Kyle's pep talk is firmly in the front of my mind and I just go for it, the worst he can do is turn me down. "Sebastian I'm hoping that you're free next Wednesday, um because," I can do this and wipe my sweaty palm on my pants, oh no, no I did not just... Forcing myself back on track I blurt out, "well you see, there's this French film that has a good write up and I was hoping you'd go with me and maybe we could have dinner too, I know a nice French restaurant…"

I'm shaking, I'm actually shaking, why does it always seem so easy in the movies? This isn't easy at all. And it's nerve-wracking as he stares at me.

"You're asking me out on a date?" He's incredulous.

"Yes…" I bite my lip, "I'm doing it wrong aren't I? I've never done this before, if you don't like the idea of a film we can do something else," I trail off as he continues to glare at me.

"You don't even know me," he growls and if it wasn't for him being Sebastian Smythe I'd say there's self loathing in his voice.

"Well that's the point of dating isn't it? I can find out more about you and you can find out more about me. All I know about you is your coffee order, your t-shirt is really soft, you lived in France for an unknown amount of time before Dalton and you speak French beautifully."

If anything it makes him angrier and he leans forward, "No, no I will not date you, if you want something with me then all you're going to get is a damn good fucking, remember the hotel room? Just like that, never anything more," he hisses at me and his breath is sweet with no hint of alcohol on it, just what is he drinking?

"Oh, it's just you were flirting with me and…" I refuse to mention the t-shirt, and maybe David and Kyle got it wrong, he wasn't flirting with me, even though he said he was at the school.

"It's what I do," he spits, "Flirt and fuck and drink," he tips his head back draining his drink and he slams the empty glass on the bar leaving behind the half melted ice cubes. Then he storms off and I deflate on the barstool.

David was wrong, being turned down wasn't the worst thing he could do, turning me down and telling me he only wants me for one thing is worse. Eyeing up his glass my curiosity gets the best of me and I sneak a sip from it, ginger ale, he was drinking ginger ale.

Confused I sit for a few more minutes until dad finds me and then I go into guest mode. I eat, I smile, I talk to guests, I do my best to charm and then I go home to David and Kyle who pounce once I'm through the door.

"He said no," I tell them and David's face falls, "It's probably for the best, it's not like Sebastian would hang around Lima for the rest of his life, but I promise not to go back to sleep."

"Damn I really thought he was interested," David sighs and slings an arm around me, "Sorry Kurt, my bad bro," I guess David and Kyle like me enough that they think I'm dateable even if I'm not.

"Well at least I know," I try and cheer him up, "I can move on right? And aren't there supposed to be dating sites for gay guys who want to settle down, you said I'm a good catch, I mean I run a garage and things."

"Yeah you do," Kyle joins us and I get hugged from the side by him too, "And yeah there are sites that are for relationships not just hooking up, we'll find one and you can give it a try."

"Right," I nod not holding out a lot of hope on it.

I go to get changed and pull on a pair of jeans and I grab Sebastian's t-shirt, it's mine now. I'm not really that enthused with finding someone else, after all I know the kind of cliental Scandal's gets.

Jogging downstairs I join the guys in the living room and watch the news with them, when did I grow up enough to want to watch the news everyday? Winding down we tell David and Kyle about the party and make plans for next week, oh no, no, no, no, no, no. I am not going camping and fishing with them, I plead work, then insanity, and then I point out that I can use the time to go through all those lovely booklets about college courses and night schools.

Dad caves and I win.

No camping for me.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Okay from various comments I've gotten I'm now trusting you to accept the flimsy plot in my romance story. And yes I will be posting everyday, this is pre-written, all done and dusted, the only changes that may happen are later on if anyone wants to correct my attempts at French and Latin. Cheers


	12. Chapter 12

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**12**

Humming while I input orders at the Lima Bean I bask in the knowledge that the house is mine tonight, no camping for me, no bugs, no fishing, no pail of worms when they fish.

There will be a nice healthy home cooked meal and there will be a movie, not Disney, and maybe a bath and perhaps some alone time, for well, you know, I'm still waking up from those dreams of Sebastian with the same problem, and it's happening every single night, it's driving me crazy, I intend to indulge myself for once today, a baby step at my new attempt at dating, well an attempt at dating someone who's not Sebastian.

I have yet to sign up to a dating site, I'm checking them out and trying to verify their high percentage of long-term partnerships and marriage claims. I'm not sure how they match you personality wise and I'm afraid I'm going to get a zero match rate, after all who would want me for the long term?

"You're in a good mood," and of course it would be him.

"And what can I get you sir," I say politely and try not to look at Sebastian.

"You know my order Tiger," his voice is flirty again and I go a little pale remembering he only wants one thing from me, that I'm not good enough for anything more from him. Inputting the order and his proper name I ask for the money and then slide his change back.

He walks off and I breathe a sigh of relief, my good mood is broken and all I can think of are his damn freckles.

At the end of my shift I eye him up as he sits at a table tapping industrially on a work pad. He looks up to catch me staring and smirks at me. He really is an egotistical idiot. But he's an egotistical idiot with freckles I want to kiss. I can vividly remember kissing them in the hotel that night and I really want to do that again.

And I have the house to myself.

Blaine's latest comment to dad about not having to worry about me because I'm such a good boy really made me mad, I don't care if he's my ex I can be a bad boy, I can be spontaneous and fun. Then Rachel clucked me under the chin and said I was adorable and sweet.

Clutching my car keys like they're some kind of lucky charm I gather my courage and walk up to Sebastian who's smirk gets bigger and he sits up in a way that's just effortlessly sexy, it's not fair, how does he manage to do that while I flounder about being adorable and sweet?

"Hello Sebastian," I aim for friendly.

"Tiger, you're talking to me again," he kicks the chair opposite him and gestures.

"No, thank you," I'm just about to bolt for the door and forget the whole silly plan still unfolding in my head when he shrugs and a freckle comes into view, "Freckle."

"What?" He asks.

"Um nothing," I start panicking, I've never done this before and after he shot me down in flames for a harmless date I'm not that confident about any of it, but maybe this will exorcise him from my brain once and for all and I can move on to someone nice from a dating site.

"Sebastian," I try again.

"You've already said that," he points out.

"Right, um I'd like to take you up on your offer," oh that's smooth Hummel I mentally kick myself.

"Really and what offer was that?" Even his voice is sexy, it's not fair.

"Err, the offer," my voice has just gotten higher due to stress, and he's said all through that school year I was a girl I don't need to remind him of it, "Um the offer of you helping me blow off steam…" And I blush like a damn maidenly sheltered princess, next thing I'll swoon and have to be rescued. I'm in my mid twenties damn it and if I want to ask a sexy guy for no strings sexy times then I will.

"Oh that offer," he nods, that's not really a yes but it's not a no and he's still smiling.

"Yes, and you said at the party," his smile vanishes at my words, "Um you said that you didn't want to date you only wanted… Anyway if you're free tonight I'd like to take you up on that offer. I have the house to myself, they won't be back until late tomorrow, I'm not sure how long these things take…" He's scowling at me now so I hurry off for a pen and a napkin, scribbling my address on the napkin I put it down near him, "Is… Err, is seven okay?" And then I turn tail and flee the Lima Bean confident that he won't turn up at seven, or any time at all tonight.

Thankfully I've already handed in my notice here, only a few more days and I won't be working there any more, no chance of running into stray Sebastians. I will however, be going to singing lessons, Will's agreed to help me get back into singing, I need to start building up my vocal chords and lungs, plus he's offering free dance lessons, all I have to do is help out with the glee club over summer, something I was already doing.

Hiding in my car I go to drive home when I realise I have no supplies, none whatsoever. I've not engaged in that kind of thing so it's not been a problem. I'm sure Sebastian won't turn up but I should have something just in case.

Driving to an out of the way pharmacy I go in and then get lost in that section, what size do I need again? And the lube, really you can get vanilla with raspberry ripple flavour? Going a little crazy as I don't know what Sebastian likes I'm glad the queue is non-existent and I get served right away.

The older lady rings up my sales and then winks at me, "Have fun tonight Kurt Hummel," oh god how does she know my name? "I voted for your daddy," oh god, "And I heard you had a young man flirting with you at the school fair," she pats my hand, "It's a good thing you're such a sweet nice boy, I'll give you some advice darlin' you make him date you first, you don't just go handing it out to him."

"I'll remember that," I pay quickly and mentally wince at the high price of this stuff I'm probably never going to use.

She hands me the bag and whispers, "Nice to see you waited to get back in the saddle after your high school sweetheart dumped you, or are you the one who wears the saddle?"

And then I flee the store completely mortified and wishing I'd never said anything to Sebastian so I wouldn't be in this situation in the first place.

Oh god, please don't let her say anything to anyone.

Racing for home I see lights in my rear mirror, no please just no, and then I notice my speed. Pulling over I bang my head on the steering wheel until I hear the knock on my window, "Hello officer," I'm polite and wait for him to ask for ID and to give me a lecture.

"Well well if it isn't Kurt Hummel," How do all these people know me? "I voted for your father, does he know you're speeding young man?" Oh god.

"I'm very sorry officer I've never sped in my life would you like my details to write the ticket now?" I offer.

"No arguments?" He queries.

"None sir," I lean over to the glove compartment and grab my driving licence brushing against the bag as I do so.

"And what's in the bag Mr Hummel?" He asks and I freeze in the process of handing him my license, seeing the look of horror on my face he motions with his hand and I cringe as I pass it across too. Hiding behind my hands I hear the bag rustle and then he hrumps, "Well Mr Hummel I heard me a little rumour about a young man at the school fair, and I happen to know that your daddy and family are out camping tonight," just let me die now, "You have yourself a very nice evening," he puts the right tone on the words and I flush guiltily, "And don't break the speed limit again."

"I'm not getting a ticket?" I frown confused as I get the bag handed back, "I don't understand, I broke the law."

"I wish all the young men of Lima were as polite, law-abiding and nice as you, don't bother me none that you prefer holding hands with a man, or slip and slide with a man if you catch my drift," if anything I blush harder, "Now get out of here before I change my mind."

"Thank you," I squeak and drive home very carefully obeying the speed limits.

I'm still trembling when I get home and dash up the stairs to hide my loot from the prying eyes of no one.

Shaking on the bed I don't know if I want Sebastian to turn up or not after all this. Not that he's going to turn up, why would he? Tea, I'll make myself some tea to calm down.

And then someone knocks at the front door, I open it totally stunned to find Sebastian leaning on the doorframe. It's only four, he's early. Now what do I do?

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	13. Chapter 13

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc… Oh and more freckle kink…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**13**

"Sebastian!"

"Tiger," he straightens up, "You going to let me in or are you going to stand there saying my name over and over," flushing at his suggestive tone I back up so he can come in, but he points to a bicycle resting against the side of the house, "Can I put that in the garage?"

"You cycled?" I ask stupidly.

"Well Tiger I need some way to stay trim now I'm not dancing all the time, and to my shock cycling can be fun," he's not changed from what he was wearing in the Lima Bean and I can see the top is scooped which means when he shifts his shoulders the freckles pop in and out of view. "Kurt are you even listening to me?"

Jerking my eyes up to his face I nod and bluff, "Yes Sebastian, and that's a very heart healthy way to live your life, exercise is good for your freckles, I mean body, your heart, yes your heart."

"Hmm," he glances at me, "You know you keep saying freckles," my eyes dart down to his shoulder and partly exposed collar bone, and then flick back up to find he's caught me in the act of perving on his freckles.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I lie, badly.

"Whatever you say Tiger," he smirks confidently.

Behind him I see a police car park up in the street and the traffic cop from earlier gets out, "No, on no, no please," I whisper in horror, not now, please not now.

Why does the universe hate me so much?

"What is it?" Sebastian asks concerned and turns to see the cop walking towards us, "Tiger, is there something you should be telling me?"

"No, absolutely not," I'm firm about that.

"Mr Hummel, we meet again," The officer stands there, "You left this behind, thought I'd better return it," my driving license is waved around. The man looks at Sebastian who's back to leaning on the door. "Well, well, now I see why you were speeding to get home young man, just be more careful next time, and do enjoy your evening," the chuckle is very suggestive and then the man thankfully leaves.

Clutching my license I hurry to grab Sebastian's bike and stow it away in the garage, as I jog back to him our evil nosey next door neighbour is peeking at him over the fence, that woman needs to get a hobby. The damn meerkat is waving at her and she smiles at him, she never smiles at anyone.

Taking my life in my hands I push him into the house and slam the door leaning my back on it and then locking it for good measure. Breathing out I find him studying me, "So... Someone was nearly a wanted criminal, I'm not being too corrupting an influence on you am I?" He asks.

I'm standing in my house with Sebastian and I have no idea what to do next, except I know he turned up after I propositioned him, so that means he's agreeing to this crazy plan of mine, right?

Taking stock I try and get my frazzled brain to work.

I have supplies of the nefarious type upstairs.

And Sebastian has freckles.

Now how do I manage to get him upstairs, into my bedroom, divest us both of clothes, pay homage to his freckles, and use said supplies, repeatedly, until they run out?

If my knees would just stop being so wobbly I could at least walk with some dignity and grace. Maybe I can bluff this. If I can just get him up the stairs.

Okay I have a new goal.

Stepping away from the support of the door I try for a strut but my knees really are jelly now and I stagger instead. My stomach is rolling with nerves and my whole body is trembling.

Reaching out I take one of his hands, his expression doesn't change, tugging on his hand I walk backwards afraid that if I look away from him for a second he'll vanish or reject me utterly. Navigating the house by memory I bang my foot once or twice but make it to the stairs otherwise unhurt.

One by one we climb the stairs in silence his eyes never leaving mine.

Down the hall to my door and then I get him inside my bedroom. Quickly closing the door I lean against it and lock it just like the front door. That smirk on his face never waivers.

Okay part one of my plan is done, Sebastian is in my room, now what do I do?

What do I want?

Sebastian. Well, Sebastian naked, because he doesn't want anything else from me.

Swallowing nervously I edge towards him and he watches me calmly, I'd hoped he would have taken charge like he did in the hotel, it was easy then, I just went along with what he wanted and I enjoyed it.

Standing in front of him I impulsively hug him, wrapping my arms around him and holding him tightly. Under my ear his heart beats slowly steadily while mine thunders trapped by my rib cage.

Hands settle on my hips and I could stand like this for a long time. It's strange to hold a man I'm attracted to and not be taller than him, I like resting my head on his shoulder and nestling into the curve of his neck.

He doesn't push me once and I reluctantly pull back from him, going on tiptoes I smooch a kiss on his face missing his mouth on purpose to catch the side of his lips.

The smirk has faded slightly and it's like he's waiting for me to do something. Oh. That. Tentatively I let my hands fall down to the hem of his t-shirt and then I slowly divest him of it, he helps me by moving his arms.

He's perfect and I have to bite my lip to make sure that this is all real, that he's really here, "I've dreamed of you," I whisper and it's true, ever since that night in the hotel I've dreamed of him.

Pulling my own t-shirt off I feel naked but go in for another hug, this one skin to skin and he's so damn warm against me. Again he rests his hands on my hips but doesn't do anything and all I do is hold him gently and breathe him in learning the smell that is part deodorant, part shower gel and underneath it all is pure Sebastian.

It's been so long, so very long, and I miss the cuddling, I miss the kissing, I miss the holding. Yes sex is very nice, and sex with Sebastian is mind blowing, but I miss the closeness.

If the world ended right now I'd be annoyed but at least I got this one more time.

Speaking of kissing I tilt my head and his mouth is conveniently positioned next to mine. I press soft little kisses over his lips exploring them, they move under mine but he lets me take control. His bottom lip is slightly fuller than the top one. There is the faint lingering taste of coffee and that special thing that is all Sebastian.

Those dreams at night have been driving me crazy and the object of my frustrated desires is right in front of me. Pretending I know what I'm doing I put my hands flat on his chest and push him backwards as gently as I can. When his legs hit the edge of the bed he sits down and then wiggles back until he's laying on the bed.

I should be ogling his body but my eyes are caught by his green ones, they're so very green and something is shimmering in them.

Before I can get completely distracted I pick up the bag of supplies and babble, "Um I wasn't sure what to get, I haven't done this for years, and well, the range has expanded quite a bit and I panicked and just got anything I thought was right, and then the cashier was giving me advice and I ran, and then I got caught speeding and he looked in the bag…" I trail off and up end the bag, Sebastian's eyes widen in shock at the pile of things now on the bed but he still doesn't say anything.

With the last of my failing courage I crawl onto the bed and lock my gaze to his as if his eyes are a lighthouse and showing me the safe path home. I make it to his side without catastrophe and lay down beside him content to fall into his eyes.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	14. Chapter 14

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc… Oh FFNet played up yesterday, some of you may need to go back a chapter.

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**14**

I'm pillowing my head on his shoulder and not much else, we're barely touching and I'm burning with need for him. Daringly I rest my hand on his chest, over his heart, and feel the rise and fall each breath.

His eyes flash and then whatever emotion was there is suddenly gone.

And still I don't move.

I want him.

I want him badly.

Memories of him in that hotel room tease and torment me, tempt and taunt me. His own breathing is slow and steady, mine is speeding up and I'm starting to pant, he hasn't even touched me yet, he hasn't even caressed me and driven me crazy knowing just the right places to stroke to fuel my fever for him until my whole brain melts and I am a mess of wanton aching needs as I beg him to quench his lusts in me.

Lifting up I shift closer to him and his heart kicks under my hand building up speed.

In order to kiss him I have to move a little more and then I catch sight of a photo I've framed and kept near my bed. It was the last day of summer after my Graduation, everyone in Glee, and I'd argued so David was included, is standing there smiling, dad took the photo for me. But what draws me are Puck and Santana with a tiny pinch of David.

David who lashed out and bullied out of fear, out of pain, running off anyone who could have helped him and screaming in loneliness. Puck and Santana who slept with anyone and anything just to be loved, to find validation even it was for a few precious seconds, to be wanted. And Santana, again, who tore down anyone just to make herself feel better, less of a loser, less of a nothing.

I work with kids like that, I know the literature on self-harming, I remember dad's embarrassing lecture and his affirmation that I matter. There are some very different paths to destroying yourself and sleeping around is one of them, oh there are some people that are built for it, they like sex but aren't addicted to it, and there are those that think it's all they're worth, that it's the only thing they can give and that maybe this time the person they are with will want to keep them.

I'm such an idiot. I'm supposed to be better than the people that use them that way, they are worth so much more than they realise.

Turning Sebastian's head I really look into his eyes and chase the shadows lingering there, and nowhere can I see that he really wants this, that he really wants me, yes his eyes are dilated but he likes sex, why wouldn't they be? His friend in Scandals had told Sebastian that celibacy was bad, does that mean Sebastian has stopped sleeping around? So what does that make me if I'm the one encouraging him to fall back on bad habits?

"Oh Sebastian, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to use you like that," I whimper and shoot off the bed to pick his t-shirt up, he's sitting up starring at me like I'm crazy. I wrestle his t-shirt back on him and hastily pick up the nearest one for myself then I scramble to get the idiotic supplies back in the bag and I idly wonder if I can get my money back, probably not, I put myself through all that today for nothing.

"God I made it all up in my head again didn't I?" I rub my face and maybe years from now I can laugh over this. "I really am such an idiot! There you are flirting with me! Me! You could have anyone you want in the whole damn world with one smirk and there's me, who the hell is going to want me, well except maybe someone like me. You probably thought I was a safe choice to fall back on flirting with, it's not like you even like me that way, I'm not memorable or adventurous, I'm a boring, sweet, nice young man.

"Maybe I should get a dog. Dog's are good and then I can go out running every morning without looking totally stupid and dogs are really good company," I wrinkle my nose, "But they drool, they drool, what if the dog drools on me?"

I break off to see an incredulous and stupefied look on his face, "I'm babbling again aren't I?" Unlocking the door I grab his hand and tug, he isn't budging, "Come on Sebastian, it's okay, I'm not going to molest you." Perking up I smile winsomely at him, "I have proper coffee and ice-cream downstairs, Mercedes and Tina went crazy on the ice-cream, guess they know me better than I want to admit, I really am that predictable aren't I. Okay so coffee, coffee is good!"

That makes him move and I coax him back down the stairs and into the kitchen, leading him to a chair I flit about the kitchen grinding beans and filtering proper coffee, pouring it into little cups and serving it with a smile all while chattering and not letting him speak for fear of what he will say.

Tackling the ice-cream next I empty the freezer of most of the goods and then there it is, ice-cream, kept safe from Finn by hiding it behind the vegetables, "Come to me my precious," I rub my hands then stop, "Sam, damn you and your sci-fi."

"Technically Lord of the Rings is more Fantasy than sci-fi," Sebastian remarks from the table.

"Frankly the fact he got me in the same room as a TV and the film is a miracle," I shrug, "That I can quote from it is just disturbing."

The smirk makes a reappearance so I dive in the freezer and bring forth the treasure, waggling it at him I smile, "See one tub of ice-cream, and it's untouched by Finn, another miracle."

Putting the frozen goods back I rummage for bowls and spoons and put dollops of comfort food in the waiting receptacles, then I raid Finn's food cupboard for sauce.

Pushing a bowl over to Sebastian I watch as he eyes up the sauces and then dismisses them to eat it as nature intended. I'm craving sauce and go for raspberry and chocolate, I'll just run longer or do more workout to make up for it, plus I know when Sebastian's gone I'm going to order in a whole pizza, my favourite go to comfort food.

"Two sauces?" He asks as I lift my spoon up.

Licking the mixture off my spoon I tell him, "Sometimes one sauce is not enough, and sometimes one sauce is one too many, when it comes to ice-cream you have to follow your instincts and trust you've gotten it right." Pausing I think for a second, "Or like Finn you could just pile everything into a bowl and cram it in your mouth with a shovel, I prefer my own approach."

Spoons clink on bowls and the occasionally sound of sipping can be heard, ice-cream and coffee shouldn't go together but they do.

A happy upbeat tune fills the air and Sebastian scowls breaking off his intense bout of staring at me and answers the phone, "What? I'm ahead of schedule on the damn book, leave me alone." He goes silence, "Oh for… No. Just no. Fine," he huffs and hangs up.

Glancing at me he drains the last of his coffee. "I'm sorry but I really have to go and work on a plot line for my agent…"

"That's fine," I brightly interrupt, "You go home, take some time, you matter Sebastian, I just really need you to know that."

I usher him to the front door get stuck opening it, remember it's locked and then fight to open it. I run to get his bike for him and present it with a flourish, "Here you go all safe and sound for you. Do you have a helmet? I didn't see one earlier, you really should get one, what if you crash? Dammit Sebastian you should take more care of yourself."

Handing him the pushbike I step back, "Um, I've handed in my notice at the Lima Bean and Scandals, I don't have many more days left there, so then you'll be Kurt free whenever you're there. I'll be busy looking into what courses I want to start studying, you won't even know I'm in town," I beam at him.

Lifting an eyebrow at me he says, "You know you're insane right?"

Huffing because I am trying to treat him with dignity I grump, "I'm not insane because I am predictable and boring and never venture outside of my comfort zone. I might be a bit particular with some things but cleanliness does not equal madness, not even for Mrs Schue, she just has OCD."

"Ah-huh," he nods, "I only need to write up a few more things and then I'm coming back Kurt."

"Or course you are," I humour him, "It's okay Sebastian, I really do understand."

"I'm not convinced you do," he murmurs and walks the bike down to the road, he gives me another searching look and then he's off, I wave him goodbye, go inside, relock the door and then flee to my room to die of mortification and humiliation.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	15. Chapter 15

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc… Please remember that Sebastian has NEVER been in a relationship before, he has no idea what he's doing.

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**15**

As I'm no longer twelve I sulk in my room for a short while and then go and wash up the bowls and cups. Rinsing the coffee maker through I leave it to drain and then skulk up the stairs to run a bath.

Grabbing a set of brochures and print outs I read up on colleges and courses while I soak my blues away. There are so many things I could study, so many interesting things out there I never knew existed when I was a teen, I'm still baffled as to what I want to do but maybe I'll apply David's rule of what I don't want to chip away at the large selection.

Drying myself I eye up my reflection, I used to be so outwardly confident about my appearance, but my scales still have a chart on them from before puberty. A weight I am not allowed to go under is marked on it, and an agreed upon weight that I don't want to go over.

I'm still pale, but Mercedes is right the muscles on my arms and shoulders are a little more defined than they used to be. The trim waist I was so proud of is still trim, my butt isn't flat but curves, it was a bitch to get my old skinny jeans over those humps. My legs are long and just as trim as they used to be.

And while I have the perfect definition of attributes that should be attractive to other men I clearly don't have that special something that actually is attractive that everyone else seems to have in spades.

Sighing I turn away and pad to my bedroom. Dragging on my yoga pants I pair them with Sebastian's t-shirt and then vacuum the house. Finn's only been back a few weeks and already the crumbs have built up threatening to take over his bedroom.

Laundry next and I hang the pieces up outside to dry.

Thick gloves and bathroom cleaner in hand I tackle the main bathroom, there are that many people here that it'll get dirty faster. Then I grab the duster and some polish.

It's not until I'm on my hands and knees on the kitchen floor scrubbing the tiles that I pause realising what I'm doing. And then I realise that my heart hurts, that my heart is beating, slowly, out of time, but it's beating for the first time in years.

Damn you Sebastian.

And damn me for being an idiot.

If I'd just left it alone, just flirted or insulted him, played along and not ruined it I could have had more of him before he leaves Lima. I don't know how that overgrown meerkat snuck in and restarted my heart but he did.

Finishing the floor, I get the dry clothes in and decide I'm having an early night, I've been through a lot and frankly it's nice to have the house to myself, no guests cluttering up the place, no one demanding anything from me.

Ringing for a pizza, one of the ones dad isn't allowed anywhere near, I bolt to my room to grab Horney the unicorn and then I cuddle my big unicorn shaped teddy bear while I eat over the top carb food and allow the latest comedy series to sooth my raw nerves.

Occasionally I think about Sebastian but I'm not going to cry over him, it was my fault, I'm adult enough to know that, and I let the afternoon melt into evening. The last slice of pizza and I get acquainted and I'm licking my fingers clean from it when the doorbell rings.

Not wanting to touch anything and with Horney stuck under my arm I walk to the front door sucking my finger to get the last bit of left over flavour, swinging the door open I get ready to tell them to get lost, dad's not here, they need to talk to him in office hours.

Except its not someone wanting to talk to dad, it's Sebastian.

"I put my bike in your garage," he says and glances at my finger still in my mouth, "Does it taste good?"

"Pizza," I mumble wondering what he's doing here.

"Ah," he nods then eyes up the cuddly toy.

"Um, that's Horney," I venture as if that answers everything.

"Right," he nods again and we end up staring at each other, "So are you going to let me in?"

"In..." Stepping back I let him in the house and get prepared to apologise to him again.

"Is that my t-shirt?" He points.

Defensively I close the door and then stalk past him, "No, no this is my t-shirt," if I can't have Sebastian I will at least have his t-shirt.

"It really does look like my t-shirt, the t-shirt I gave you to borrow at the school fair, when you were going to go all bare-chested trying to drive the impressionable children crazy at the sight of your magnificent torso," he teases.

Well he's back to normal, "Sebastian, I have no idea what you're talking about, I wouldn't walk about half naked in front of children and this is now my t-shirt as the rules of finders keepers applies as well as possession is nine tenths of the law. I am willing to buy you a nice shiny new one though in thanks for the help you gave me."

Vanishing into the kitchen I wash my hands and then arms are wrapped around me from behind, "I don't want a nice new shiny one, I want that one, and now I've seen you in it, I want that t-shirt with you in it," he whispers into my ear and I shiver.

He's just flirting, he's trusting me to not misunderstand and I will prove he can by not throwing myself at him.

"Well then look how lucky you are," I smile at him, "Here is me in this wonderful t-shirt and all is well in the world." Moving to dry my hands his arms tighten around my body, "Sebastian I need to get to the towel," and he comes with me across the kitchen.

Really baffled by him I walk back and pick Horney up as something to do with my own hands, I twist my neck and head to look up at him, he just looks back those emerald eyes twinkling merrily.

"Do you want to watch TV?" I offer.

The front door bell rings again and I sigh, "Now what?"

Sebastian lets me go and I carry Horney to the door, only to find six of our other neighbours crowded around the door, "Kurt! Are you okay? We saw someone creeping around the place, called the cops, and came right over, the cop should be here soon too."

"Someone was creeping around?" I repeat shocked, it's such a quiet neighbourhood.

In the background the TV shuts off and then I hear footsteps as a certain chipmunk comes into view, "Sebastian, did you see anyone creeping around?"

"It was him," one of the neighbours points dramatically at him, "He was going in your garage!"

"I put my bike away," Sebastian stands next to me, in his hands is the left over pizza box, "I'll put this in the trash for you Kurt."

"Um, thank you," he's being nice and helpful, I don't trust it.

"Oh you have a friend over," Mrs Henders smiles at me, "You are such a good boy Kurt."

"He is isn't he," Sebastian agrees and there's something in his eyes that makes me worry. "I'll be right back," his voice goes husky, "And then we can talk about you wearing my t-shirt I let you borrow among other things," with a suggestive wink he saunters down the yard to the trash and I'm left facing the shocked neighbours.

"Does your daddy know what you're up to young man?" I get before one of the women starts giggling and telling me it's about time and she'd 'hit that one up'.

Mortified I hide behind the unicorn and peek to see the same cop from earlier stopping and talking to Sebastian. The neighbours all mosey on over too and I'm contemplating locking the door on all of them when Sebastian's back and walking in like he owns the place.

Grinning at me a bit boyishly he says, "Tiger, life is never boring around you."

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	16. Chapter 16

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc… (Again remember very badly written romance, just go with it...)

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**16**

"Me?" I'm outraged and close the door with a slam as I flare up, "It's all you, my life was boringly routine, and then you accosted me in the supermarket."

"Well you ignored me," He eyes me up, "I didn't know if you even remembered me and lo and behold you did," he's back to smirking.

"You're a little hard to forget," I mutter and his whole face lights up in delight. I didn't mean it as a compliment.

Strutting up to me he leans around and locks the door and then he takes my hand tugging me towards the stairs, "If you're going to keep my t-shirt the very least you could do is let me have one of yours," and it's a reasonable suggestion.

He leads me up the stairs and into my bedroom.

Standing there clutching Horney like a life line I eye him up and then go over to my chest of drawers to find him a t-shirt. Green he should have green, it will bring out his eyes. Picking out a few I turn to hand them to him to see him in just a really tight pair of underpants. He's even taken his socks off.

Speechless I stand there holding a few t-shirts and he takes them out of my hand, he looks at them and then decides on one, pulling it on he poses in my full length mirror, "This one," then he ambles over to my bed and gets in.

"What are you doing?" I squeak not sure what to think of him.

The most pathetic puppy eyes and pout are sent my way, "Kurt we got interrupted earlier, and I've worked really hard on my writing, I'm so tired," he looks wide awake and then pats the other side of the bed, "You said I mattered," his voice goes husky.

If I were really a girl, at this point I should spray him with mace, beat him with a baseball bat and kick him out of the house. It's the sensible and smart thing to do, you really can't be too careful, there are people I trust to sleep in my bed and then there are people who can't even sleep in my house if I or anyone else is in it.

Chewing my lip I hesitate.

He's already proved he's not interested in me that way.

"Just sleep," I double check, "Nothing else."

"Nothing else," he promises, "Just sleep and maybe cuddling?"

In two minds about it I nod and then hand him Horny, "Here, you can cuddle my unicorn."

"Thanks," he wraps an arm around my unicorn, "Just why is he called Horny?"

"That would be Britt," I tell him, "She bought him for me so I'd always remember I'm a unicorn too, and she doesn't really understand some of the more complex things, like innuendo," which isn't completely true, she often gets the most complex things the rest of us flail around and screw up on.

"Hmm," he pats the bed.

Leaving my yoga pants on, I'm not a total naive country simpleton I slide under the covers and then Sebastian yawns curling up on his side and seemingly falling fast asleep.

He looks younger, more innocent like this, he has no smirk to hide behind.

It was like that with Santana at the first all girls sleep over, how vulnerable she seemed, more human, it was a shame to see her wake up and rebuild the armour she always wore.

Not wanting to be a creeper I sneak out of the bed and turn the lights out, then settle back where I was. I can hear him breathing. I listen to the rhythm of it and drift off.

I wake to sunshine, a hard warmth along my back, and Horny in my arms. Somebody's spooning me and I'm wearing clothes. The ring tone for my dad is loud and the body behind me groans.

Sebastian.

It's Sebastian, and then he's leaning over me as I kick-start my brain into doing something, "'Lo, Kurt's phone," Sebastian's voice is rough and sleepy. Oh no. "Sure, give me a minute," and then the phone is waved in my face, "For you, your dad."

Taking it from him I put it to my ear as Sebastian snuggles in apparently heading back to sleep.

"Hi dad, are you okay? Is it your heart?" I ask worried.

"Oh I'm fine, my damn phone has a hell of a lot of messages on it telling me my son is having a sleepover with a guy," oh no, but he sounds more amused that angry, "Just make sure you used protection and I'll stall them here for a little while, we won't be back until this afternoon, make sure he treats you right and I don't need to know all the details."

The phone goes dead and my head flops onto the pillow as I groan, dad's assumed the worst. The arms around me squeeze for a second and then let go as Sebastian shifts to whisper in my ear, "Is the offer of a date still on the table?"

Stiffening in his arms I freeze in shock wondering what game he's playing this time and then he breathes out, "You don't know about my mother do you," it's a statement not a question but I shake my head anyway. "I thought you did. I thought you were taunting me at the party."

"Sebastian, I wouldn't," I blurt out, my voice loud in the quiet of the house.

Those arms squeeze again, "I wasn't thinking, I'd argued with father again, it hurt," his voice holds pain and I squirm around dropping Horny in the process, he wont look at me so I wiggle a bit more, now he can duck his head under my chin. Hands grab my t-shirt and he shakes in my arms.

I don't know what to do or how to comfort him so I stroke my fingers through his hair and keep him close.

"She's French," his voice floats up, "I hate French food, it's covered in crappy sauce all the time, can't they just do something normal for once?"

"And I asked you to dinner and a French movie, I'm so sorry Sebastian…"

"You didn't know," he cuts me off, "You didn't know." I can feel fingers playing or twisting in the fabric of my t-shirt behind me, "And now you do, what date would you come up with?"

Is he serious?

My mind is completely blank.

I can't think of anything, and start to panic at being given another chance, "Um…"

A really loud rumbling fills the room and it's his turn to stiffen in my arms, "Sebastian did you eat last night?"

"No, I was busy writing and then I came straight here," he says.

I'm not sure what to think about that but at least it's given me an idea, "Then for our first date I would offer you a home cooked breakfast, what would you like? I can make you omelettes, pancakes, waffles, cereal, toast, any of them and a fine ground coffee to round it all off."

"You have waffles?" His voice is like a child's.

"I have waffles and many syrups," I whisper trying to be seductive.

"Waffles," he says firmly.

Amused I sit up though I have to fight him a little, he's clinging to me, worming Horny under his arm I stroke his cheek and extract myself from the bed and the living octopus that Sebastian has become.

"Bathroom's down the hall, you know where the kitchen is," I leave him there and hurry to the bathroom myself I really need to pee and escape to the kitchen to think.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	17. Chapter 17

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**17**

Juggling cooking the waffles, making my grapefruit and brewing coffee I don't have a lot of time to think and then Sebastian is there leaning against a counter top watching me, and he's wearing his pants again.

Self conscious I smile at him set the table and start serving his food, that is another thing I remember about Sebastian, he has amazing timing, mostly to upset me or make my life hell but still its amazing timing.

Savouring my grapefruit I'm fascinated at the speed the waffles are demolished, he's nearly as fast as Finn but much neater. Chasing the last piece around his plate he sighs and sits back with his coffee.

"Better?" I ask nervously unsure of what to do next.

"Much," he stares openly at me, "Those waffles were good."

"Thank you," I preen at the praise and then blink, I'm not used to praise from him. "Did you want anything else this morning?"

"You," he states and I choke on my grapefruit slice, he's back to smirking but it's a hungry smirk.

"Oh, um," is he playing with me? It's hard to tell but my heart is beating quickly in my chest and I swallow even more nervous than before.

"Well you did say it was a date, I do think it's a bit forward, breakfast at your house when no one else is home," he raises a lazy eyebrow at me.

"What? It's not forward you were already in bed with me…" And now that I think about it.

Leaning forward he puts his elbows on the table sipping his drink and giving me a superior look.

Huffing in annoyance I stab a grapefruit piece and chew on it. Damn him, how does he do that all the time, nothing seems to get to him, well except that time with David and just now in bed when he told me a snippet about his mother.

Hmm.

He's a guy. Guys bond over things like video games, there are even some of Finn's that I don't mind playing too much but he tends to sulk because I beat him at them so much. "I could brave Finn's room and go borrow a console so we can play video games, or there's a wall of movies and TV series to choose from," I offer.

"Movie," is his only answer.

"Okay, if you want to pick one out I'll clean up and join you," and try and work out what you're up to.

Washing up and leaving everything to drain I walk through to find a pile of movies on the coffee table. And Sebastian's already loading one.

Perching delicately on the sofa I catch sight of myself in the window and then hurriedly run my fingers through my hair, I've not even showered this morning, what is he going to think of me? A weight hits the sofa to my side and then Sebastian is enfolding me in his arms and he tips us over so we fall to the sofa.

"Sebastian what are you doing?"

"Cuddling, plus your hair looks wild like that, like you've been doing some very debauched things in the night," a kiss drops on the nape of my neck and then he nuzzles me. I let his comments go for now.

We lay spooning on the sofa, his hands never wander once, and we watch Indiana Jones. Halfway through the first movie I realise he's mouthing some of the words, it seems I've learnt something interesting about him after all.

Then we watch the second one and then the third when his stomach rumbles loudly again. He won't let me make him lunch until it's finished, only then does he let me go.

Making him a traditional lunch of sandwiches with a side order of fruit I pour him some lemonade. Putting it all on the table I look up in time to see him stroll in.

"How do you do that?" I ask him.

"Do what?" He sits and pulls his plate possessively towards him.

"Know the exact moment to turn up every single time," I sit on my own chair, "You just breeze in and it's the right moment."

"I do?" And he's smirking at me.

"Yes you do. If it was me I'd be hanging around outside trying to work out the right moment and miss it," he just shrugs and takes another bite of his sandwich.

It's a very uncomfortable lunch, he doesn't say anything to me, he stares at me, intently. Almost any other encounter we've bickered or argued or I've done my best to ignore him, I'm really not sure what to do with him at the moment.

Finishing my very small sandwich, because I wasn't that hungry, the ice-cream and pizza from yesterday at the forefront of my mind, I reach for the pear on the table, "No," is all he says and I blink at him in astonishment. "Not yet, please Kurt."

It's the please that decides me and I pull my hand back. We end up staring at each other and I study his face and the few freckles that are on show. Brushing his fingers to get rid of the crumbs he actually tells me, "Okay I'm done, you can wash up now."

Oh really. I lift my eyebrow and bristle to start arguing when he smiles gently at me, "I thought we were still on a date, and I so want my dessert."

Annoyed at him I take his plate and glass and then start washing up. I might not be a woman but I can see why they complain they get treated badly by male chauvinists.

Arms slide around me and I go to shrug him off when he kisses my neck, "God you look sexy all angry and riled up like that," the bastard has upset me on purpose, his hands rub my body as he nips his teeth on my ear.

That feels far too good and I can't stay angry at him.

"Hmm, I knew you'd want things to be tidy before I got my dessert," a hand squeezes my ass and then something is waved in front of my eyes, its one of the unopened lubes from upstairs, "I figured we'd start with the boring stuff and work our way up to the flavoured ones, make sure neither of us is allergic."

"Err..." I'm getting a feeling I know what he considers dessert to be today, the lube vanishes, and the tube is popped even as his hand is yanking my yoga pants down, "Sebastian," I protest very slightly but then his finger is there and pushing in, I don't fight it, I don't want to fight it.

"Yes Kurt? Did you want something?" His finger moves and prods my prostate making my hands spasm and drop the knife I'd used on the butter earlier, I whimper gripping the edge of the sink as he does it again. "Sorry Kurt I can't hear you properly you keep making these delicious noises. Noises I'm hungry for."

"S...Sebastian," I try to form a sentence as his other hand plunges into the front of my yoga pants to squeeze my hardening cock, "Sebastian," I buck in his expert hands.

It's been too long. Those damn dreams aren't helping me regain control of my body as his sensual attack overloads my brain. His mouth is on my neck biting and sucking seemingly finding every nerve that's tied into my cock that's being fondled by him.

A second finger slips inside me and I hiss grinding my hips back to take more, "That's it Tiger," he encourages, and then he bites down firmly on my neck, it should hurt, it does hurt but in a good way. Since when do I like that? And he's going to leave a mark there.

"Sebastian!" I yell and he twists his fingers so I claw at the sink to steady myself.

Stretching me out he gets a third finger into me, "So tight Tiger, so tight for me, you're going to be the best dessert aren't you!" He grunts in my ear as I whine wordlessly agreeing with him. "Going to have you all laid out on that table for me."

Table? My wrecked brain can only think of the kitchen table. He wouldn't, would he?

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	18. Chapter 18

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**18**

Apparently he would.

Prepared, slicked and ready for him I'm lead on shaky legs to the kitchen table, "Sebastian, we can't…" is my token protest.

"Why not? If you really don't want to, just say no," he takes off the t-shirt he borrowed from me, his smirk becoming wicked and tempting, "No is all it takes, I understand no, if not I'm having my dessert on," he tugs my t-shirt off, "the," his hands lift me up the short distance to the kitchen table, "table."

"Oh," I perch there uncertain as he strips off my boxers and yoga pants so I'm completely naked. I also can't hide the evidence of what he does to me and my erection is fairly prominent. I want him, I really do want him, but I've never done anything this wild before.

"Perfect," he growls unsnapping his jeans and shoving them down just enough to free himself, a condom appears as if by magic and he puts it on and lubes himself.

A hands touches my shoulder, "Lay back on the table Tiger, go on baby let me see all of you," there's something hungry in the way he says it, in the way he's staring at me.

Hesitantly I lay back which in turn tips my hips up for him, he smirks seemingly pleased with the sight. Those hands of his shift me on the table until he's happy and then he steps forward so this hard thing presses at my ass and I gasp.

"Easy Tiger," he soothes me, "Easy, I'll go slow for you," and he does, the head of his cock broaching me so very slowly. It's hurts but it doesn't, it's more a burn and I breathe out forcing myself to relax and not tense.

Sebastian keeps going and going, filling me and it's been so long, I'm not good with toys but they never felt like this. "Sebastian!" He freezes, "Don't stop," he moves again and then he's in, all the way in.

Neither of us moves, I can't, I'm sprawled out on the table his hands on my hips keeping me there. His head has dropped forward and he's panting, when his head tilts there's no more smirk only hunger burning in his eyes.

Whimpering I see him pull back out of me even as I feel it and then he's not gentle anymore as he slams into me rocking the whole table, "Sebastian!" I'm not sure if I want him to stop or do it again.

"Got to find the angle," he mutters moving me again, this time when he pulls out and then slams in I scream as he hits my prostate with more power than I've ever had. "Found it," he's satisfied, it's all the warning I get as he simply ruts into me with as much strength as he can muster.

It's too much and not enough all at once.

Never had this better, but I can't seem to do anything, I lay there taking it, writhing, whimpering, screaming and loving every second of it. His hands slip on my hips before I realise I'm sweating, he has to change the angle to keep hold of me, it's less satisfying and I moan wanting it back again.

"No Sebastian, no," I beg him and he stops.

"K…Kurt? Fuck, Kurt… Did I hurt you?" His chest is heaving but he's stopped completely.

"The other way, please, the other way, it's better like that…" I thrash just thinking about it.

"Fuck you are so bossy," he chuckles and then he puts it back to how it was and rams himself in as I go back to screaming for him.

"SEBASTIAN! Please, god please, 'BastiAN!" I have nothing to cling to on the table my hands uselessly scrabble for purchase and then they lock onto his wrists and I begin to flex my hips, matching him thrust for thrust.

"'BAS! Harder, god just harder!" I scream at him overwhelmed and loving it.

"You are such a pushy fucking little bitch," he yells and his hips speed up prompting mine to follow him. "Kurt! Kurt!"

In the hotel he fell apart too, his calm collected cool vanished and it's doing the same now, I wail as I'm goaded to my climax, I need one last good push to get me over the edge but he yells his whole body shuddering as he gets his first.

Inside me he spasms and there's no warm rush, I cry out sobbing for my own release and have to lay there struggling not to whine as he comes down from his high.

His eyes are completely blown and he's dazed as he stares at me his face slack with the after effects.

"Please," I whimper, "Please, 'Bastian, please, need," I hiss and writhe under him.

Shaking his head he blinks and looks down at my achingly hard cock, he lets go of my hip and I let my hand fall from where it held onto him. That hand of his wraps around me and I tell him, "Yes, thank you, yes." It only takes a few strokes and I can climax, he's still buried inside of me and I scream happily as the orgasm thunders through me. Lines of cum splatter over me and I don't care it feels so good and I float on fluffy clouds.

I'm aware of him leaving me and the ache that lets me know I'm going to be walking funny for a while, I just don't care.

Tissues rub my stomach and I open one eye to see Sebastian cleaning me up, he spots me and he looks just as destroyed, he smiles at me and I try to sit up and can't. It's like my body controls are temporarily switched off.

Fingers trace my open legs and I want him again, the line of lust shooting through me, "How can I want you again? We've only just done it," I mumble.

A ghost of a chuckle from him and he has to help me sit up, then to get my feet down on the floor, "I loved my dessert," he breathes into my ear, "It was delicious," I shudder and lean into him.

Together we stumble to the stairs and climb the impossible number of steps, falling into my bedroom we drag the sheets back and I collapse onto the mattress, he tucks me in and we curl into each other.

At some point my phone beeps and Sebastian moves to get it, "Hmm Tiger wake up, they're leaving the campsite now."

"Later," I murmur and sneak closer to him.

Kisses land on my face and I see him staring at me, "Kurt are you okay to move yet?"

"I'm going to feel it for a while," I admit and go in for a kiss, he kisses me back and I smile at him.

"'Kay wait here," he kisses me harder and then tucks me in, I drift off as he pads off through the house.

Rustling of sheets and a very chilly Sebastian snuggles in to me some time later, he's here so I can fall deeper into sleep, kissing his shoulder I go to do just that when he whispers, "Why? Why did you want to date me? Why did you agree to be my dessert just now?"

So tired.

I mutter something at him, something truthful and then I don't remember anything.

"Kurt," It's dad and I grunt at him, "Kurt, come on wake up, get some pants on you and your guest and then get your backside downstairs for dinner, Carole's making chicken kiddo."

"Ngh," I protest.

"Don't care, get up, and next time leave your bedroom door closed, Finn had a moment thinking someone was molesting you, he's downstairs raiding the cookies to calm himself down."

Opening my eyes I go so sit up but someone's holding me, I twist my head to see my dad standing in the doorway, "Dad?"

"Up, pants, food," he pauses, "Maybe use a hairbrush too," and then my bedroom door is swung shut and closed with a click.

Beside me the body appears to be fast asleep but the breathing is wrong, I stare down at Sebastian and then his eyes open catching mine effortlessly.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	19. Chapter 19

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**19**

My family is home.

Oh god, my family is home, and there are discarded clothes in the kitchen, signs of how we defiled the kitchen table, and DVDs strewn in the living room. "Oh no, the kitchen," I go to get up but Sebastian holds on tighter, "'Bas let me go, I have to go and clean up."

"Already done," cuts through my panic.

"Really?" I'm shocked.

"Hmm, DVDs are away. Clothes are up here. Condom disposed of properly, they won't find it. Lube back in with the frankly awe-inspiring amount of supplies. I scrubbed the table and put it back from where we moved it and I even dried up the lunch things."

"Oh," I relax into him, "Thank you."

"KURT!" Dad yells from downstairs and I sigh.

Eyeing up the man that might be my boyfriend, but I'm a bit confused as to if he's really accepted the offer or not, I ask, "Chicken for dinner?"

"Sounds good," that smirk is sliding back onto his face.

Standing up I wince and stretch my body out, oh yes that's going to be noticeable for a day or so. Wow, I can't believe I even did that. I've never done rough things, not even in the hotel, it was merely energetic.

Hands kneed my shoulders and I jump to see a naked Sebastian there, his thumbs dig into my muscles and I sigh. His kiss on my shoulder makes me shiver and he presses his front to my back, "Cold?"

"Not really, but we really should go down before dad comes back up," and I'm a little regretful.

Discarding my yoga pants I wear jeans this time but as he's eyeing up his old t-shirt I put it back on to keep it safe and my old t-shirt goes on him and covers up those freckles.

I refrain from mentioning the other t-shirt he was in when he came over, I think I may have just gained an extra t-shirt out of him, leaving me with a lead of one t-shirt over him.

As ready as I'm ever going to be I guide him back downstairs and into the living room, the smell of chicken is starting to waft through. Dad's sitting in his chair, and only Finn, Dave and Kyle are here. Carole must be in the kitchen.

"Where is everyone?" I ask thinking the whole gang would have all come over here.

"I thought it best to have a mini break," dad eyes Sebastian up and I flush, "We have just camped and fished together. I'm Burt," getting up dad holds his hand out to Sebastian who shakes it.

"Sebastian."

"Nice to meet you Sebastian," and dad isn't the slightest bit upset at meeting the boy who'd been so horrible to us for a short while in high school, I guess David's done all the hard work and it's easy to see how well David's turned out.

"Bro?" Finn asks brushing crumbs off of his chest, and I just cleaned the house, "Why are you wearing that new t-shirt you've been sleeping in all week?"

Oh god.

Trust Finn.

"Sleeping in all week huh?" Sebastian's smirk has gotten much bigger.

"Yeah," Finn nods and adds, "Hey Sebastian? How come your t-shirt looks like one of Kurt's?" Oh god.

"Does it?" Sebastian's all innocent, "It's mine though, just like that one's Kurt's."

"Oh..." And Finn doesn't get it, but David and Kyle do, and dad's picked up most of it too.

"Hello I'm Carole," and I love this woman for breaking up the embarrassing situation.

"Sebastian," and hands are shook again.

"Did you want anything to drink? Dinner shouldn't be long," when Sebastian turns down the drink she goes back to the kitchen and I really want to follow her and hide.

Instead I let Sebastian tug me over to a free part of the sofa and down to sit on it, as with the DVD watching moment he welds himself right up against me. His arm has slid around me and I wiggle to get comfortable trying not to wince and wondering if I'll get away with laying on my stomach for a while.

"So Sebastian," dad starts and I tense, "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a writer, some small stories, bits and pieces," and that tone catches my attention, he's hiding something, I let it go and promise myself to corner him at some point and make him talk.

David's grinning at me, he flicks his eyes to dad then back to Sebastian, mouths 'Smythe' and then shakes his head.

Frowning at my friend I don't get it and then dad asks, "So Dave and Finn seem to know you, did you go to McKinley or one of the other high schools near by?"

Dad doesn't know. He hasn't worked out that this Sebastian is THE Sebastian Smythe. How has he not worked that out? Uh-oh. He's smart he'll work it out soon.

"Dad," I step in, "How was the camping? Were the fish biting?"

It diverts Finn who happily tells us all the boring details and Sebastian arches an eyebrow as if asking me what that was about but David takes up the thread and starts going on about the food, the great camaraderie around the fire and how nice it is everyone's grown up and moved on from when we were all kids.

Dad knows something's going on and then we escape to the kitchen table and I have to sit there and eat my dinner off of something Sebastian was doing things to me on. It doesn't help when his foot touches mine and rubs a bit.

We survive dinner and we're just getting to dessert and I start blushing when his phone goes and he glares down at it, "I'm very sorry it's my annoying agent and editor," he escapes the kitchen and we all blatantly go quiet and eavesdrop on him, "Oh, I'm sorry I was eating, I happen to need it, I don't know to keep living? Really, no really, and just why?" He goes silent, "Fine but you owe me dinner for seven, yes seven, I'm at my boyfriend's," my heart leaps and I try to keep my smug look from my face, "What? No I haven't forgotten how to do that! Yes, yes, I'm going now."

Walking back in he's angry so I get up, "You have more plot lines to do?"

"Sorry Tiger," and he does seem genuinely sorry.

"It's okay, I'll get your bike from the garage…" And then I can talk to him in private too.

"You have a motor bike?" Dad's frowning.

"No dad, it's a push bike, you cycle on it," and now is an excellent time to push him, "You might want to take it up, it's really very heart healthy," that gets me released to drag Sebastian outside.

"He doesn't know who I am does he," is all Sebastian says as we open the garage up.

"No," I move closer to him and then get dragged into a full body hug, I have a feeling Sebastian doesn't do anything by half. "I'll tell him tonight."

"Not ashamed?" That mask on his face is firmly in place, just what is going on inside his head?

"No, I'm not ashamed of you Sebastian, but I do want to get to know you, I want to know the man you've grown up to be…"

"Who says I've grown up," he goes to tickle me and then steps away to pick his bike up, passing me he leans over to kiss me, "See you later Tiger."

"Sebastian?" I have to ask.

"Yes?"

"Are we really dating?" Please let him say yes, please, I don't know why it's so important, but it really is.

Backing up a few steps he stares into my eyes, "Maybe I did grow up a bit because you are my very first boyfriend, I've never stuck around longer than a night, or two."

I get another kiss and then he's off into the growing twilight.

Shutting up the garage I get ready to take on my dad.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	20. Chapter 20

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**20**

Bending over the engine of the car I hum along to the music in the background, unsurprisingly I know all the words but I'm not quite ready to sing just yet, but soon.

Last night was difficult, dad did not take knowing that man was in effect Sebastian SMYTHE, son of the States Attorney, the boy he'd heard so many bad stories about.

It took some tag teaming from me, David and Finn to get him to grudgingly agree to allow THAT boy under his roof and I got a mini lecture about how I matter.

Carole's more worried I'm going to get my heart broken, but then David muttered, "Better broken than fast asleep and numb." That comment shut everyone up and I assume he's referring to my sleepwalking way of dealing with the loss of Blaine and NYADA.

I have a few tentative theories about why I reacted the way I did then and I think if Sebastian breaks my heart, though really I'm more expecting when he breaks it, I'll sleepwalk for a while but not for as long. This time I'll have other things to snap me out of it, I won't have loaded all my dreams and future happiness into purely being with one boy, or man in this case, and one college and one career until there's nothing else left in my life.

My phone alarm beeping at me gets my attention and I straighten up with another wince, still feeling it, fishing my phone out of my overalls I can see it's set with 'Have dessert with Sebastian :)'. I don't remember programming that, and how am I supposed to have dessert with him when I don't even know where he lives or what his phone number is?

"Tiger," and he's here.

The man has the most impeccable timing and a big smirk as he strides towards me holding up a pear. Which only reminds me of yesterday and the dessert of a pear that turned into something else.

"Sebastian," I smile happy to see him but still so very confused on what he is to me or I am to him.

He has none of those worries and simply leans in to kiss me softly, "Ready for that dessert?"

Flushing at him I ask, "Is there anything you can't turn into an innuendo?"

"I haven't found it yet," his finger hooks one of the loops on my overalls and then he tugs me to the office.

The guys all grin at me, having already made fun of the hickey on my neck this morning, no one says anything now and then I'm in the office with Sebastian who shuts the door and then steers me over to my desk chair.

I get the nice comfy, padded, chair, he perches on the edge of the desk and fishes out an apple. We eat in silence and it's surprisingly comfortable and not awkward.

"So Tiger, how did your daddy take the news that you're dating the anti-Christ?" Sebastian looks like he's making a joke but I take it seriously.

"He wasn't happy, but we pointed out how much David's changed, and he's agreed to not interfere, he's just worried about me and getting hurt, I didn't handle things very well when I was eighteen and he doesn't want me to go through that again," I tell him and carry on eating my pear, and it's the same pear from yesterday he must have taken it from the house, like he added that alert to my phone.

"It's good to see Dave so much happier," Sebastian nods and takes a new bite of apple. "Pity he can't tell his younger self it gets better and to keep an eye out for Kyle, isn't it?"

Sniggering at his words I grin, "I can't picture the homophobic closeted jock David used to be taking the news that he was going to marry another man very well, he'd be more likely to punch the messenger and throw a slushy at them."

Frowning at me Sebastian tilts his head, "Oh," I say, "You didn't know David then did you? He was a really big bully through my Junior year in high school I used to come home covered in bruises from all the locker slams, at least he always missed when he threw slushies at me, it wasn't until he threatened to kill me that I was able to get him expelled," I sigh, "Of course that got overturned so I had to flee to Dalton and the protection of Zero Tolerance, Blaine helped dad and Carole get the lower school fees for me and they had to give up their honeymoon for me," I smile softly, "I'm so lucky with my parents."

For once Sebastian's staring in shock and his composure has gone completely, "He did what? You had to do what? Are we talking about the same Dave? He's a teddy bear... He didn't fight back when I was mean to him or when those kids bullied him until he..." Sebastian stops and pulls himself together.

Smirking at him I plonk my feet up on the desk next to him and flutter my eyes at him, "I guess you know as much about me as I know about you. You know what? We should go on an actual date where we talk, I could learn more about you, I mean I already know all about the impeccable timing, liking Indiana Jones, Master pear thief," I wave the half eaten remains of my pear and he grins at that, "And you seem to be a cell phone calendar reprogrammer."

"You got all that from our last date? I'm impressed Tiger, but if we talked what secrets of my soul could you pull out of me?" His free hand caresses my leg, "Could I risk it? Should I risk it?"

"Hmm, well that's up to you, but I think it would take a very long time to learn all your secrets Mr Smythe, to explore the depths of your very being, and you'd get to explore my depths too," It isn't until I've said it I realise how he could twist it and twist he does with a breathy suggestive laugh.

"Well if you're going to propose that and are putting it on the bargaining table, or should I say kitchen table, how could I refuse?" He asks and I'm flushing brightly and wishing I was more relaxed about these kinds of things as he laughs at me again.

There's a knock on the door, "Sorry boss but um it's Mr Paris again."

"It's open," I call out and the homophobic customer charges in to stop short at the sight of me lounging in the office eating a pear with a handsome man sitting on my desk paying court to me. "Mr Paris, how can I help you today?"

Blinking he says, "My car's making a funny noise."

Finishing up my pear I throw the tiny bottom part in the trash and grab a wet wipe to clean my sticky fingers, standing up I turn to Sebastian, "I'm really sorry but I have work to do, thank you for the dessert, the pear was lovely, almost as good as one I'd have picked out to buy."

"You're welcome Tiger," he snags me and pulls me in for a hug, but this is Sebastian and I get a soft kiss too, "Hmm pear, nice," hands squeeze my ass and I jump, "See you later Tiger, I can't wait for our next date, and this time we'll talk, no snuggling on the sofa watching great movies."

"I grant you Indiana Jones is good, but there are some amazing musicals out there Sebastian," he pulls a face at me and it's my turn to laugh, "Or we could go to a nice restaurant and eat good food, walk in the park holding hands, whisper sweet nothings at each other..." He stops me with a kiss.

"Romantic," he taunts me.

"Always, and I love flowers," I hint.

"I'll keep that in mind," and then he slips away.

"Right Mr Paris, let's see to your car shall we," I go out into the garage to find the problem, a stone was caught in one of his tyres. "There all fixed I'll even do this one free of charge for you."

"That young man..." Mr Paris looks embarrassed, "I don't agree with your lifestyle choice but you've always been such a nice and sweet young man, never causing your father any problems," he hesitates, "But that young man you're dating? He looks like trouble, if you were a girl I'm sure your father would be locking you up and getting his shotgun out to fend him off."

"Um, thank you for defending my virtue?" I'm a bit baffled, "But I'm aware of Sebastian's past and I promise to be careful."

"Right," the man's face goes red, "Only young people today hurry into things these days you might want to withhold certain, um, things from him to make sure that it's you he's after, not a passing moment of passion."

And then we both realise what he's just said, hurriedly parting ways he leaves and I go back to working on the car from earlier.

"Hey boss," Miguel calls out, "Did Mr Pain in the Ass really show you concern? And warn you off your new paramour?"

"Yes he did Miguel," I shake my head, "Next he'll be organising a gay pride parade," people can be so strange.

"Yeah well you might want to listen, that young man of yours," the mechanic pauses, "I know men like him, it does not always end well for the lady they're chasing, if he plays you, me and the other guys, well, we can explain it to him, in detail, that you're not that kind of man."

"Err, thank you Miguel, but I can tell him that myself, with words and not fists," I nip that one in the bud and pretend the kitchen table incident never happened.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Also sorry for not replying to all the amazing reviews you've sent me, I promise to start catching up :)


	21. Chapter 21

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**21**

It's been two days since I've last seen Sebastian, I've gone from euphoric 'I've got a boyfriend and he brought me a pear' to 'He only wanted me for sex, the complete fiend'.

Just one more shift at the Lima Bean after this and I'm free to spend more time studying or going for runs, and I've been thinking about cycling too. It's summer after all, the perfect weather to take up riding around outside.

"Tiger," his voice is soft and I glance up mad that he's left me for so long but he looks absolutely wrecked.

"Sebastian! When was the last time you slept?" I'm horrified he's put himself through that and I'm ashamed to admit I automatically think of him out partying having a good time while I'm left at home being good.

"Got all the damn things she wanted done, no more editor to annoy me for a while," his smile is more of a grimace.

Tapping in an order I pay for it and on impulse put his name as 'snuggle monster', "Go grab your drink and food, I'll be off in a minute," I point and he doesn't even argue which worries me.

Twenty minutes later and I'm sitting next to him, he lifts an eyebrow and taps his drink, "Is it me or is that decaffeinated?"

"It's decaff, you need to go home and sleep," checking out the small cake I'd gotten for him too I can see it's been demolished. "Come on Sebastian, I'll drive you home, you can put your bike in the back."

"But I came to see you," he pouts at me.

"Well you've seen me," I say firmly and then stand up, "Up, home, sleep."

Grumbling he does as he's told taking his empty cup with him and slinging an arm around me to pull me close to him. Guiding him outside I get him to unlock his bike, then I put it and him in my car. He gives me the address and I take him home.

It's not what I was expecting, for a start it is an apartment above a shop in the older part of town. Getting him and his bike out I let him lead the way up the stairs to the set of tiny pokey rooms. It's tidy, mainly because there's nothing in there, a desk with a laptop, no TV, a doorway to a cramped kitchen, no table or chairs, not that they'd fit.

Leaning his bike against the wall I glance into the bedroom, which is a single bed and a rail of clothes with a box on the floor for his other clothes to be sloppily piled on top of.

The bathroom is a squeeze of a shower, a toilet and a sink. You wouldn't be able to get more than one person in here without having to call someone to help you both back out.

Sebastian's leaning on the wall near his bike watching me being nosey.

"Right let's get you to bed," I help him over to his little bed and catch sight of my once t-shirt. Picking it up I drag his current t-shirt off and then put this one on him. Tugging off his pants I leave his underwear on and I can see he's tenting the material.

Oh.

Tucking him in I stroke his hair, "Now sleep."

"Bossy," he grumbles but his eyes close. The empty coffee cup is next to his bed and I'm intending to throw it out when he says, "Kurt, just put it with the others please."

"Okay," I walk into the kitchen and on top of the cupboards he has kept his coffee cups, all two of them, 'meerkat' and 'Sebastian' are sitting up there so I wash this one up turning it so 'snuggle monster' is on show.

Raiding his cupboards I find them pretty bare.

That won't do.

Stealing a key I let myself out and then nip down to the small mom and pop corner store. I only need a few things to tide him over, like tins of soup. I arbour tinned soup but I don't have time to make it from scratch for him. There's some bread and a few other staples including apples and pears.

Smiling I tiptoe back into his apartment. Filling up his cupboard with my meagre offerings I leave an apple, pear and a tin of soup out, along with a bowl, a spoon, the tin opener and a plate for the bread. Scribbling a note telling him to eat I also put my cell number down telling him to call me when he wakes up.

Then I leave him to sleep it off and lock myself out of his home.

Going home I'm back to my euphoric 'I've got a boyfriend' mood. Plus I have a surprise party to finish organising.

A party I can't plan due to David noticing my good mood and then stalking me to my room to close the door with us in it and then jumping onto my bed and grinning like a Cheshire cat, "Okay spill."

"What?" I cross my arms.

"The grin, the humming, the happy dancing on clouds look in your eyes," he smirks at me and pats the bed, "Spill."

Perching next to him I giggle, "I saw Sebastian again."

"And?" He flops to lay down on my bed tugging me with him.

"And he says he's been working on his writing, he was exhausted so I took him home, tucked him into bed and then bought him some soup to eat," I tell him, "Oh and the coffee cups he got when I was working? He kept them, they're in his kitchen on a cupboard."

"Cups?"

I explain and David's back to grinning, "Cool, so you're dating then…"

"Yes." I sigh, "David was it this confusing with Kyle?" I also can't believe I'm in my bedroom talking guys with David Karofsky. My how our lives change.

"Kinda. I'm a guy he's a guy, you'd think we'd be fairly similar, we both like sports but the man hasn't got a damn romantic bone in his body, and sex isn't romance. He did get me butterscotch candies though," we share a look and nod at that.

"Which reminds me," he pokes me with a finger, "Why were you limping around the house a few days ago? You being such a good boy and everything…"

Face palming I hold my hand out, "Pinkie promise, I know you'll tell Kyle but no one else, ever."

"'Kay," and we pinkie swear. The look of shock on his eyes as I tell him about the night of cuddling and then dessert on the kitchen table, "Dude I eat off of that table!" and then he makes me fist bump. And then I break down and tell him about the supply run with resulting disasters, he laughs so hard he cries and then asks, "Why the fuck didn't you ask me? I got unopened lube and plenty of condoms, idiot, you could have avoided all that."

"Oh, I didn't think of that," why didn't I think of that?

"Let me see this supply," he goads. And he takes his time pawing through it, making the odd comment, "Wow Kurt, I know it's been a while bro, but as athletic as Sebastian seems to be, you'd kill him trying to use all of this up in one go."

We degenerate into a pillow fight and Kyle comes up to see what all the fuss is, he then has to know about the supplies scattered over my bed and decides I'm a sex fiend and that he really needs to warn Sebastian about me. I smack him with a pillow and chase them out of my room.

Clearing up I go back to planning their surprise party. It would serve them right if I made it overly girly and pink, but Kyle wouldn't care less and would just order in pizza and it would hurt David's feelings.

Dammit.

Instead I do it properly and glance at my phone now and again to see if Sebastian has text me yet. Nothing.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	22. Chapter 22

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**22**

I'm arguing with myself the next morning as to whether I should go over and check on him or just wait for his call when my phone finally beeps and it's an unknown number.

'Tiger, well I'm awake, and someone broke in to leave me soup and a pear. S xxx'

Yes I have his number and he sent me kisses. Quickly typing a reply I send him, 'You should be careful I hear there have been a spate of soup leaving crimes in your area, maybe you should come over so I can protect you. K xxx.'

Grinning I snag some breakfast and sit at the table, a table both David and Kyle keep staring at. I stick my tongue out at them. Turning to dad and Carole I mention, "Sebastian might be coming over today."

"Yeah?" Dad's not that impressed with him.

"Yes and I would appreciate you not polishing your shotgun in front of him while hinting you know how to hide bodies," I glare at him.

"He won't," Carole adds, "He'll be busy working on all the wonderful paperwork that builds up," he grimaces, "So you and your Sebastian can do what you want."

"Thank you Carole," I start to clear the table and lean over to kiss her cheek, "You're the best step mom on the world, I don't know how I got so lucky."

And with perfect timing my boyfriend knocks on the door. I feed him breakfast which gets inhaled by him and then as everyone is staring at him I drag him out of the door for a walk.

Holding his hand I slide my sunglasses on and walk next to him just enjoying the sunshine and a day off from the garage. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes, I only woke up just before I sent that text, I had enough time to shower and then I left to flee to the safety of my boyfriend's protection," he teases me, "I wouldn't want to meet the dangerous soup leaving crimelord on my own."

"Don't worry you're safe with me," I tell him and squeeze his hand. "So are you finished with your writing for a while? I'm sorry but I don't even know what you do."

"That's because I haven't told you," he shrugs, "I have a few novels published but under a different name," and he's looking uncomfortable which intrigues me. "I have a few short stories published and I'm a freelancer for a couple of online magazines. I do pretty much anything or any genre. The writing is fun but doesn't really pay that well, and as dad and mom have cut me off for not following either one of their life plans for me I'm stuck making it on my own."

That's probably the most information I've gotten out of him since I met him all those years ago, "Hmm well you seem to be doing well at making it on your own," he gives me a sarcastic look, "No really, you have a roof over your head, I'm assuming you're eating and you have work, it might not pay well but you have it."

"I do don't I," his hand tightens on mine for a moment, "Thanks," he's thoughtful.

"You know I'm leaving the Lima Bean? Well I only did the hours no one else wanted to do and frankly the pay is rubbish, but you might want to give it a go," now I get a full on incredulous look, "I'm serious Sebastian, it's low steady pay, it's not hugely difficult but I've been told you need to have good customer service skills."

"Oh in that case, if you can get a job there I can," he snipes with a smirk.

"I think you'll find I've got great customer service skills," I sniff.

"Really? An interesting interpretation of customer service, I'll take that on board. So what about you?"

"What about me?" I ask.

"Well you know about my career in writing and my possible fledgling one in coffee serving, what about your many many careers?" He lets go of my hand and rests his arm around my shoulders, taking that as an invitation I slide an arm around his waist and we synchronise our walk.

I tell him about the garage, the bar job at Scandals, and the Lima Bean. "I volunteer at most of the schools, I've been police checked so many times but I'm there more to help the bullied and bullies. To protect the former and educate the latter."

"Does it work? I always found teenagers to be particularly stupid, I never could stand being around them," he mentions.

"You know you were one right?" I'm amused at his shudder.

"Please, I couldn't stand myself either," and it has a ring of truth, with my arm around him I have to hold it there and I decide to cheat pushing a thumb into his jeans hooking my hand there in the process.

"Well luckily you grew out of it, imagine if you'd been stuck there like a permanent teenage version of Peter Pan?" He pulls a face and I laugh at him, "Ah poor Sebastian."

"So, you mentioned classes?" He hints.

Back to me then, and I expand on my tentative plans for my future, "The annoying thing is I like working in the garage, it's satisfying to fix broken things and listen to them purr as they pull away. If only I could do away with the necessity of wearing overalls and the disgusting grease and oil."

"Well I have to say I'm impressed, I can barely change a tyre if I get a flat, I'd be helpless without guys like you. And don't you know the sex appeal of the overalls? On you with that damn blue T I keep seeing in my head I am learning I have quite the kink for them," his leer makes me blush.

"Maybe if you ask nicely I'll borrow a clean pair and we could, maybe, have dessert again?" I bite my lip and look away.

"I'd like that," he kisses my cheek and I gaze at him happily. "But not before we've had a few dates first, you have to wine and dine me properly, you're the one with the boyfriend experience I'm relying on you to help me get through it."

"Oh, okay," and then my mind goes blank, "I can't think of anything."

A shrug from him, "That's fine, I believe there was a walk in the park on your list and I'm fairly certain we're supposed to have a grown up dinner out one evening, and possibly dancing, if you still dance…?"

"I think you could tempt me into dancing," I daringly rub a circle on his hip with my thumb and he jumps slightly.

"Good, so we have a list to work our way through. That means this dating thing is a go. Hmm this is much easier than I thought it would be," he admits.

"It's supposed to be easy," I tilt my head so it rests on his shoulder, "It's when life gets in the way you have to remember to work for it, to put the effort in," and that's where things tend to go wrong and I realise I'm expecting him to run at that point.

"Pull together," he startles me with his comment.

"Yes," I sneak a kiss onto his jaw, "You have to pull together and not apart, to compromise on all the important things, to be there for the other one."

"Okay, we'll give that a go too," he says and then he's suddenly grinning and waving. It's our evil next-door neighbour, we've circled the block and we're back again, she's glaring at me and then catches sight of Sebastian, and the crazy woman dimples and waves back.

He shamelessly blows her a kiss, giggling she turns away giving me a look that wishes me a thousand pain filled deaths.

"Evil woman," I hiss under my breath.

"Really? She seemed nice," Sebastian says.

"You didn't have to stand there helplessly and watch her stab Finn's balls with her scissors one summer while he cried," I mutter.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	23. Chapter 23

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**23**

It's not until he stops dead in his tracks and stares at me before exclaiming "What?" I realise how I've phrased it.

"No, I mean yes, I mean," I rub the back of my neck, "He used to play a lot of football and if the ball landed in her garden she'd stab it in front of him with this giant pair of scissors making him cry. And then one night Puck got revenge on her and somehow blew up her garden gnome collection even though he swears he was aiming for the love seat."

If anything his face scrunches up in an adorably cute way as he falls over onto the grass of our front lawn laughing loudly. Crossly I put my hands on my hips and glare down at him, "It's not funny Sebastian, Finn was really upset and the Exploding Gnome incident only cemented the hate in her tiny little heart." He laughs harder.

"Sebastian," I huff and stamp a foot.

Giving up I check I'm wearing dark jeans and then sit on the grass near him, he nearly gets himself under control a few times and then starts laughing again.

When he can breathe without giggling I pull him to his feet and drag him to the front door, he's still sniggering as we walk inside. "Something funny?" Kyle asks as we pass through the living room.

"Apparently Sebastian finds the situation with our evil neighbour funny," I mock sniff.

"You mean the one that always glares at you?" Kyle frowns, "What's so funny about it?"

It's just sets Sebastian off and he leans on me as he struggles to get air in, rolling my eyes I tell Kyle, "Because she stabbed Finn's balls deflating them with her scissors," and Sebastian collapses to the floor howling and gripping his sides, "And Puck blew up her Gnomes."

Staring at me Kyle thinks for a few seconds, "This is another of those really weird Glee stories isn't it, like the cat at the nursing home," I fill him in on all the details and then Kyle's laughing too.

Leaving the pair of them to the hilarity I go to get some drinks out of the fridge. David sticks his head around the, "Why is my fiancé giggling like a school girl with your boyfriend and occasionally whimpering the word Gnome?"

"I told them about the evil neighbour," and he just nods.

"That was a bad time for Finn, the way he'd cry those silent tears was heartbreaking, and seeing the shattered pieces of Gnome littering her back garden was sad, pity she took out on him by throwing water balloons at him," he says.

"Don't tell them, they're bad enough as they are they don't need the additional information yet," I warn him.

"Got it," he nods and snags some more lemonade.

Breaking the two men up he manhandles Kyle to the sofa so they can watch a film and I tug Sebastian up to my room to see if he's still good at plotting so I can use him to help pull off the perfect engagement party.

Once he can function again I do get a lot of practical help in planning the party, he's got a head for organisation and can picture what I want fairly quickly, we steam through the plan and I can barely keep up with him as I type furiously.

"Done," I clap and press save several times, "We're geniuses, this is going to be the best party ever."

"Have you added the Glee club factor to it?" He's sprawled out on my bed.

"I don't understand," I'm confused again.

"Well I have noticed that the moment any one of you gets involved in anything it somehow turns into this big dramatic production with cataclysmic events at the big finale," he pats the bed next to him.

Laying down beside him I smile, "Oh that, no we just make it up as we go and hope, so far none of us have gone to jail, oh wait Puck did for a while, but none of us while we've been adults."

"He went to jail?" An arm pulls me closer. "Do I want to know?"

Telling him about Puck's aborted and ill thought out mission to steal the ATM he shakes his head, "How did any of you make it to Nationals? You're all crazy."

Snuggling in I smirk at him, "Does it help you to know that we thrashed you at Regionals with only one day of rehearsals? Or that we wrote most of our big winning songs the day before Nationals? Or that half the time we barely had the money to travel to the competitions? And that most of the time we were arguing with each other and trying to snatch the soloist part from everyone else to the point that we'd have sing offs all the time?"

"How?" He appeals to the ceiling, "How did you ever manage to get anywhere?"

"That Glee Club Factor," I mention, "Admit it we were amazing as a group."

"I refuse, the Warblers were amazing," he refutes.

"I will grant you they were good but New Directions were better, if crazy, over the top and dramatic," I wiggle on top of him pinning his hands to the bed, "And you're invited to the secret engagement party so you'll get to join in to."

"Not the party," He shudders doing things to my body that aren't unpleasant and my hips shift on their own, "Oh Tiger," his voice goes sexy on me and then he smirks, "So this was your plan, slay me with laughter, drag me to your lair and then have your way with me?"

"No, I had no plan but spending time with you," I lick my lips, "But now you happen to be here… We could practice kissing, it's been a while for me and what kind of boyfriend would you be if you didn't help me relearn this valuable life skill?"

"In that case I will sacrifice for you and take one for the team," his eyes land on my mouth and I lean down to press our lips together.

"I can't believe it," Finn's stomping down the hall, "I get that being guys means you can kiss but do those two have to make out ALL the time, they're supposed to be watching TV. Hey Kurt have see my… Kurt!"

I jerk my head up to see my brother standing there doing his best not to freak out. "Finn, I'm a little busy what have you lost now?"

"Sebastian, you had better treat him right!" Finn snarls at him.

My hands are still on Sebastian's wrists and he waggles his hands, "But Finn I'm the one that got dragged up here and I'm the one pinned to the bed."

Struggling with that one Finn hesitantly says, "Kurt, you had better treat him right?"

"Oh for goodness sake," I sigh, "Finn go away unless you want me to help you, Sebastian stop teasing my brother he's far too easy a target, and I have a boyfriend to kiss."

Beating a hasty retreat Finn is soon gone which leaves me with Sebastian who's grinning up at me, "Kiss away," he offers.

"I intend to," I lean back down and he tilts his head to help me when my cell phone goes off. "Now what?" Sitting up on Sebastian's stomach I answer the call trying to ignore the hands that are now resting on my thighs and making little circles there. "Yes?"

It's work and there's something wrong with the spare parts order, and this is why I hate being the boss, I have to sort out all the big things, it does however, appeal to the control freak in me.

"Damn I have to go in," I glare at the phone, "Can we maybe rebook more kissing later?" I ask Sebastian hopefully.

"Absolutely," and his hand slips to my groin palming me, I have to bite my hand to stop myself groaning and my hips grind myself into him. "God you look amazing like that."

"Guys?" Finn calls, and then wanders past my doorway with one hand over his eyes and the other one outstretched then he walks into a wall. "Ow."

Shaking my head I climb off my boyfriend and have to rearrange things before saying, "You can look Finn and I have to go into work so you're safe."

"And I have to see a Bean about a job so I'll be gone too," Sebastian adds.

Taking his hand away from his face Finn frowns, "Bean's employ people?"

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	24. Chapter 24

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**24**

When I mentioned the Lima Bean as possible employment for Sebastian I expected it to take a week or so, I didn't expect to turn up for my very last shift to find him already here and familiarising himself with the layout, ordering system and the magical coffee making machine.

He's also very good at the job picking it up swiftly and can multitask as he teases some of the female customers and puts orders in.

Walking around I clear up after customers and wipe tables as he steals the show completely. If he weren't gay there would be a lot of women picking him up as he showers them with comments. Some of their boyfriends and husbands don't look happy at his antics.

Intending to rescue him before the big burley guy glaring daggers at him throws a punch I'm shocked when I sidle up to Sebastian and he pulls me into a hug, "Hey honey, so how am I doing on my first day? Told you I had this customer service thing covered."

The man on the other side of the counter relaxes and the woman next to him coos at us, "Well Snookums," I retaliate, "There are still a lot of customers to serve and some of the men might think you're hitting on their girlfriends."

I know he understands but that gleam in his eye's there as he does the cute facial scrunch, "But Tiger, you're the only man I see. Why would I be hitting on women?"

"It's fine," the big scary burly man says and he starts to smile, "You have fun Mr Hummel and say hi to your dad, we voted for him."

"Thank you I will," I say a bit breathlessly as I'm plastered up against Sebastian, "Now Sebastian you have work to do, behave."

He lets me go and then nods with false contriteness, "Yes Kurt," I'm walking away when I hear him whisper to the next bunch of customers about how bossy I am to him, it's a bunch of cheerleaders who all giggle and agree I'm bossy to them too.

Oh dear.

And he thinks I'm involved with a bunch of people who are natural disaster magnets, he makes his own disasters. Leaving him to it I catch sight of David and Kyle walking in, ah yes, my own little leaving the Lima Bean party is about to start.

The others all turn up and I amuse myself at their reactions to Sebastian serving them, I do hope he behaves himself with their names on their cups. It's a faint hope and I bustle around the shop busily as the gang all gather in one area.

The time arrives and I hang up my apron for the last time, the other employees all hug me including Sebastian who uses it as an excuse to squeeze my ass making the women giggle at him. "I'll be off in another thirty minutes," I freeze in his arms at the thought of him joining us, "Not ashamed of me are you?"

"No, just not looking forward to the fallout," I kiss his cheek, "I'll see you soon, say in thirty minutes?" And he gives me a genuine smile. Why do I feel like I just passed some kind of test?

Making my very last cup of coffee I pat the non-hot part of the machine fondly and then with a wave I skip off to my friends.

Of course the subject would be Sebastian and why he's working here, butting in I tell them, "He's working here because I suggested it to him, this way he only has to work part time and he can keep on writing."

Annoyed that their favourite coffee spot is ruined a few of them whine about him being here when I snap, "Get used to him being around, he lives in Lima and works in here now, plus he's my boyfriend."

Crushing silence and David tips his cup at me in support, Finn gives me what he thinks is a sympathetic grimace, Kyle sticks with David and most of the rest stare. Mercedes and Tina exchange a glance and then Tina bravely breaks the deadlock, "So you're dating again, that's great Kurt, while Mike and I are in town we can double date."

"Thank you Tina," I'm grateful to her and her adoring boyfriend, I'm glad they've managed to make it so far together it gives me hope love really is out there, but is it with a chipmunk?

Slowly the conversation picks back up and I get a few disapproving stares which I steadfastly ignore until a certain shadow falls on the table and then he's pushing onto the bench with me to weld himself to my side.

"Miss me?" He asks me.

"You were only on the other side of the shop and I could hear the ladies giggling at you," he pouts at my words, "Yes I missed you."

"Good," he's smirking again and then his arm is slung possessively over my shoulders and he settles in, "So how's everyone?"

They all stare at him. Oh god this is going to be one of those disasters isn't it.

David rescues us, "Awesome 'coz I'm getting married."

"You know what?" Kyle acts dumb, "Me too, wow how amazing is that?"

It smoothly diverts everyone to the impending wedding next year and David basks in the joy of being so very happy it's almost sickening. Under the table a knee touches mine and Sebastian somehow manages to break the laws of physics by getting closer to me than I thought was physically possible.

We spend the next few hours there and then agree to meet back up at mine, well my parents, as it's the biggest to hang out in the back yard, but then Blaine steps in, "Why don't we go to Breadstix?" Which instantly gets seconded by Santana who's strangely addicted to the horrible things masquerading as breadsticks there.

Rachel phones through and books us all a table.

Twisting my neck I murmur to Sebastian, "Do you want to put your bike in my car? I can drive us there and back, I don't mind dropping you off at yours tonight, I could walk you to your door, make sure no soup tin wielding maniacs were hiding near by?"

And maybe get invited in for coffee? Our making out session was derailed yesterday by work.

Heat flickers in his eyes and then he shakes his head, "No, but thanks," he tenses and whispers, "Haven't actually been paid for today yet…"

Oh.

"If I offer to pay are you going to get as prideful as I would be if our positions were reversed?" I ignore the momentary amusement in his green eyes, at least he passes up the innuendo, I've handed him on a plate, "Okay, but I can still stop off to check you got home safely?"

"Is that the only reason or are you going to pin me to the bed again?" He asks softly, I flush guiltily and he chuckles, "Can't resist dessert huh?" I flush harder and nudge him to behave he just chuckles at me again. "Go, have fun with your friends. I'm working tomorrow, you're working at the garage and we can meet up after?"

"Sounds like a plan," I agree and then on impulse kiss him gently as he stands up to leave.

"Bye Tiger, bye everyone," I watch him get to the door and he turns to blow me a kiss making me sigh and then he's gone.

Sitting back normally I find them staring at me again, "What?"

And then passes four hours of torture until I plead having to go to work and I storm out of Breadstix annoyed at their attitudes and how they kept trying to put me off Sebastian by reminding me of all the horrible things he's done.

The worst thing is I do feel guilty now, he did threw a slushy in Blaine's face blinding him but he'd been aiming for me, he really nearly put a terrible photoshopped picture on the internet under Finn's name, he tried to steal Blaine from me, he took over the Warblers in a cut throat power move. He did sleep with Blaine and with David for one night only and according to them for one round only.

Stomping up to my room I phone David, "Yeah you got Dave."

"David when you slept with Sebastian did he really just get on and off for one round?" I blurt.

"Yeah? Why?" He sounds confused.

"Because when I slept with him after getting drunk at Scandal's he stayed all night for multiple rounds and he didn't just top, he bottomed," oh god why am I telling him this?

"Sorry you got the wrong number," David says and my stomach drops at those words and then he says, "Hey Kyle honey? I'm sorry but I'm getting a headache, can we go back?" And only then does the phone go dead.

He's coming back here and I'd better be ready to face him, David might look like a big dumb jock and act like one but he's really a giant romantic teddy bear with a mind like a buzz saw when he wants to. He's smart enough that he can beat me into the ground with most subjects without trying, when he does try he can be damn scary.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	25. Chapter 25

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**25**

It's a stupid move and it's never going to fool him but I do try and feign sleep. All I get for my efforts is a finger poked in my side right where I'm ticklish and I jump giving away that I'm wide awake.

"You do not get to make a phone call like that Kurt Hummel and then dodge questions," David sits on my bed and Kyle closes the door before joining him, "What the hell was that about and spill I want all of the details."

Huffing at him I try and wiggle out of it but with two of them staring me down I sit up and tell them about getting drunk, about Sebastian being nice, about me grabbing him and dragging him into the cab, about having to stop to get stuff because I hadn't been planning on it at all, and then the marathon sex in the hotel, I edit the freckles, they're mine now.

"So why didn't the pair of you hook up then?" David frowns.

"He wasn't very complimentary regarding my bedroom skills in the morning when he left," I admit and I'm still worried about them now, I've not had any practice since.

Snorting Kyle smirks at me, "Yeah, that's why since he ran into you at the supermarket he's been angling to get in your pants," I blink and run our confrontations through my head, Kyle's right, Sebastian's been pleasant and eyeing me up since that moment.

"True," David nods and then scowls, "Hey how come he didn't rate me then? Jeez that brat was on and off and gone," crossing his arms David starts to sulk a bit. "I'm not that bad in bed."

Rubbing his shoulders Kyle comforts him, "Of course you're not, you're amazing, and he didn't even give you a chance to show him your patented bench pressing move," those hands slide over David's impressive biceps and squeeze.

It makes David chuckle, "True," he twists to kiss Kyle, "Thanks babe, and by the way, you're totally awesome in the lover department too."

Leaving them to their moment I snuggle back under my covers and wait for them to exit my room for the night, I'm already feeling better and calmer.

Another poke in my side and I bat at David's hand, "What now?"

"So what brought on that question?" David asks.

Sighing I roll over and get comfortable, "Because of what everyone was saying at Breadstix," I play with the bed sheet with my fingers, "Sebastian did do all those things and I should think about what everyone else went through because of him."

"True," David nods, "But he's not a teenager anymore, and he's not pulled any stunts as far as I know since he's moved into Lima. Has he been mean to you? Has he thrown any slushies at anyone? Has he threatened to kill anyone?"

"Babe," Kyle moves closer to him and kneads his shoulders.

"David," I scold him, "You're not the same boy..."

"Neither's Seb, and they way he looks at you," the man shrugs and leans back into his fiancé, "Just talk to him Kurt, let him know what you're feeling, he's agreed to be your boyfriend and only you could ask a guy out, get turned down, proposition him, nearly get a speeding ticket having bought up all the lube in this cow town, and then sleep with a guy innocently until he pounces at lunch the next day and still end up with the guy as your boyfriend."

"You make it sound like I did it on purpose," I huff.

"No," Kyle sniggers, "But I love coming home for the holidays and seeing what's happened in everyone's lives, you're all crazy."

"Talk to him," David wags his fingers, "See if you're both on the same page now, before you invest anything else in him, and if you are, fight for him, our friends can learn to like him, just like they learnt to like me."

"'Kay," I nod grateful he can be so nosey and willing to get involved in my problems.

They go to get ready for bed and I do feel better. Grabbing my phone I shoot off a message before I lose my nerve about whether he wants to get married or not and has he ever thought about kids.

Less than a minute later my phone rings and it's him.

"Hey," I greet him, "Did you make it home okay?"

"Fine, and did you mean get married right now because I'm fairly sure the wedding chapel's closed," he's teasing me.

Glad he can't see me I flop back onto the bed, "I didn't mean right now and I know it's a big conversation thing, we've not been dating long, and we're still getting to know each other, but do you? One day? Way in the future?" Babbling I keep going knowing this could frighten him off but really wanting to know, "I do, one day, I really do. I'm not sure on the kids issue but I thought I'd adopt, only I thought I'd be single and it's hard to adopt when you're gay and even more when you're single."

Breaking off I cringe at how overly emotional and clingy I'm acting.

"So it wasn't a proposal," at least he's amused and I relax. "Honestly, I've not really thought too much about it, my parents were very unhappily married and it ended in a really messy divorce, but then I see people like your parents, and I want something like that, it's just..." he pauses, "Scary. And I'm not sure how to wring a guarantee out of someone first."

"I'm not sure happy ever afters come with guarantees," I sigh, "You're more likely to get kicked than kept."

"Hmm and is that supposed to be swinging me towards the marriage thing or away from it?" I can see him smirking at me.

"Honestly? I have no idea, in fact I have no idea what I'm doing with my life, with us, with my job, my future studying, my friends, any of it," I pauses, "Sorry it's a bit late to be discussing this isn't it."

"No," rustling comes from the other side, I think he might be in bed and I imagine him there. "It's nice to know I'm not the only one floundering around too, everyone seems to know what they want, I love to write but frankly it doesn't pay the bills that well. You, I was not expecting you to agree to be in my life, I just had that amazing memory of you and I thought I'd blown it out of proportion, instead I think I tried to make it less," I should probably be offended but I'm preening at his words. "For the first time in my life I'm free of my parents and I really don't know what to do with my freedom."

"Write," I tell him, "Write and make coffee, go on dates with me. David asked me what I wanted to do the other day and I drew a blank so he asked me what I didn't want to do, that was a bit easier."

"Don't want to do, yes that could help," he's mussing, "If nothing else it makes me really sure I don't want do as my parents tell me and be a lawyer or a doctor." I want to joke about him as a lawyer or doctor but I do remember him saying he'd refused to do what he's parents wanted him to do.

"And now you're at the same point I am, congratulations on being young and lost just like me," I use that as my joke.

Laughing he agrees and somehow it's two hours later and we really do need to get to sleep, "Good night Sebastian, sweet dreams."

"Night Grenouille, I'll see you tomorrow after work," he murmurs and we hang up.

Cuddling my sheets I'm just drifting off when I realise he's called me a frog, in French.

Offended I go to phone him back and bitch him out when I remember that I told him I'm a frog, still a little hurt I sulk when my phone buzzes and I have a message, "Is your lily pad big enough for 2?"

"Yes," I message him back.

A few seconds later I get, "Move over you're hogging all the greenery." Followed by another one, "Nice view, I can see why you like it."

Giggling at his humour I message him, "Really? I was too busy looking at you… 3"

"Smooth Hummel, very smooth xxx, now go to sleep xxx." And I almost disobey him but it is late and I really do have work in the morning.

Closing my eyes I hold onto the phone in case he texts me again.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	26. Chapter 26

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**26**

Having rushed home to shower I have no idea of my plans but tell dad I'll be out tonight as the gang want to hook up and wander down memory lane, Blaine's promised to bring his eye patch.

Spotting their plans I'm going to bow out and sneak off with my boyfriend to have a nice dinner at his, not that he knows it yet. And I pack a few other supplies just in case.

"Be safe kiddo," Dad says and I nod, of course I'll be safe, I've only ever broken the speed limit once and Sebastian's apartment isn't in that bad a place. "Make sure you suit up," and yes dad must need a break so I frown at him and then he looks really uncomfortable, "you know," he waves his hand and suddenly I do know.

"Dad!" I hiss, "We're eating dinner together."

"Yeah, and I used to be young once too buddy, plus I did date Carole for a while," I don't want to hear him and put my fingers in my ears.

When I'm sure he's stopped I awkwardly pat his arm, "You don't have to worry, if that thing happens I promise I've thought ahead and I'm not only being careful but I've made sure I have stuff for it."

"Good. So we don't have to have this conversation again?" He asks blushing as much as I am.

"No, we really never need to have this conversation again," I reassure him and then bolt for the front door.

"Kurt," Finn blocks my escape route, "You ready for today?" He grins.

Feeling really bad I tell him, "I'm so sorry Finn but I have plans with Sebastian," his face falls, "But how about you and I do something together, just us, I miss not having you here, and when you are here so is everyone else," And its all true.

"Awesome, have fun," he waves me off.

Driving to the Lima Bean I do feel like a very mean brother and then I'm all but skipping up to the counter where my boyfriend is being as much of a tease and a flirt to any female with a pulse as he was yesterday.

It's me next and I smirk at him, "Mon Tigre," he leans over the counter and crooks a finger so I lean too and he kisses me. Not bothering to ask me my order he taps it in and refuses to let me pay, "I got my pay cheque," he winks and I graciously accept.

Sauntering down the counter I grab my coffee and he's ordered one for himself. His just reads, 'Sebastian', mine reads 'mon bel homme', and my French is rusty from lack of use but I'm fairly certain he just called me his beautiful man.

Sipping my coffee I wait for him and he doesn't take long. Holding out his coffee I'm startled when he ignores it to pull me into a hug and he kisses me again, still as soft and gentle.

I'm really not used to PDA and I've never given in to it except with my girls, this is Lima, I don't need a bigger target painted on my back, but Sebastian doesn't seem to care and now he takes his coffee.

Slinging an arm around my waist he keeps me close and smirks down at me, "Bonjour," he murmurs.

"I thought you didn't like French?" I'm a bit confused, so far he's called me a frog, his tiger and his beautiful man in the language he got so grumpy at me about.

"Our little conversation last night, it made me think and I realised that just because I hate my mom doesn't mean I have to hate French, it's a perfectly good language and no one else here speaks it so I can whisper things to you as much as I want and they'll never know what I'm saying," that naughty mischievous gleam is in his eyes again.

"Oh," not ready to touch the giant can of worms that Sebastian's family appears to be I latch onto, "So you think I'm beautiful?" It might be a bit too feminine but I like it anyway.

"You are the most beautiful man I've ever seen in my life," he tells me and my heart starts beating quickly, "I used to think that made you a girl," my heart plummets, "I used to think men had to be more like me, like Blaine, like Dave. But you," his hand tightens on me, "You are so very fucking beautiful you can't be for real, and you're so very masculine I want to strip you naked and never let you wear clothes again, I want to see every plane on your body, that curve of your ass, to worship you until you never leave me."

"Oh," I blink and try to work out if that's a compliment, creepy, or an insult.

The smirk falls back into place and he taunts me, "But if it was you answering about me I'm going with just one word, 'freckle'."

"Not true," I dodge and then give him a smirk of my own, "It wouldn't just be freckles, it would be cheekbones, green eyes, the way you scrunch your nose," he scrunches it and I laugh, "your collar bones, your hands, your mouth being far too kissable…" I break off and nibble my lip.

"All those things? Hmm I think you like me Kurt Hummel…" He drawls it.

"Of course I like you Sebastian, I wouldn't have asked you out otherwise. Now what are you doing this evening?" I ask him.

"I thought we were going out with your friends?" He was paying attention to our late night conversation last night, "Wasn't the plan to settle down and chill out, to catch up and reminisce or something?"

"Yes," I tighten my hand on his t-shirt, "I was thinking more, you, me, your apartment, my cooking skills, and it leading up to dinner for two?"

"Done," he doesn't even hesitate. "But I have to go spend my pay cheque on food before we do, and my kitchen isn't up to the standard you're used to."

Shrugging it off I boast, "With my skills Sebastian the kitchen doesn't have to be up to standard, I'm a culinary genius, I promise to keep it simple and you'll love every single bite."

Bending slightly he whispers in my ear, "I'll hold you to that and I fully intend to have my dessert again."

Swallowing I tremble and press against his body as the lust he invokes streaks through me, "Yes, you can have dessert, I want you to have dessert," I whimper back.

He pulls back slightly and that heat is back in his eyes, "Not here mon bel homme, shopping, food, and then dessert, all night I'll feast on you."

Almost dragging me from the Lima Bean he has to slow down when my legs won't work properly and he holds my hand so gently.

Loading his bike into my car, he's careful not to get mud in my boot, and I drive us at a sensible law abiding speed to get food.

Hopping out I lock up and we grab a cart, he's determined to stay close to me and welds himself to my side. Under normal circumstances it's distracting but thinking about him and 'dessert' I can't function, his body rubs against mine, his scent is invading my senses.

"Stop, please Sebastian, I need a little room," he backs off, "Thank you, I'm never going to make it around the shop otherwise," I have to jiggle my jeans a tiny bit. Groaning I look at him, "I may have changed my mind, we should order take out and I can just take you home and not make a spectacle of myself by groping you in public."

I hadn't realised his body was so tense until he relaxes and a gentler smirk rests on his lips, "Poor Tigre, your prey so near, so close and you can't pounce and have your fill of me. Soon," he teases me and we go into the shop side by side, but with a few inches of space.

"Sebastian," I whine, he laughs and I join in.

Blatantly sensual, that's a new thing in a boyfriend too, he oozes sensuality and confidence, to the point where I pretend to examine some vegetables just so I can ogle his ass.

Being Sebastian he catches me at it and then proceeds to walk in front of me exaggerating that wonderful ass-et of his and he even contrives to bend over in the slowest bend I've ever seen in my life, I give him a breathy laugh that morphs into a giggle at that.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

All languages other than English are from Google Translate as my grip on all languages (including English) is not the best, so any errors are Google's I wash my hands of it completely. (But if you have better translations please let me know and I'll reload chapters with the corrections – thanks).


	27. Chapter 27

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**27**

Laughing at yet another joke Sebastian has whispered into my ear I'm giggling as we peruse the frozen veg section, our hands are touching on the cart's handle and we're walking along side by side, shoulders brushing and hips bumping.

The ache for him is still there but he's distracting me so we can get food before I 'devour' him, his word not mine.

Checking out the special deals we try and estimate the size of his tiny freezer box and what we can shove into it before picking out some mixed veg and moving on. In the tinned section I bitch about everything and read all the labels, we end up compromising on some soup as he said he liked the last batch.

Strolling through the pasta area I learn he's a big fan of Americanised Italian food as long as it's simple, which all the ready-made stuff clearly is. Instead of letting go of the cart to grab the pasta he wants he crowds into me and reaches around me and makes rude noises on my neck with his mouth so we both end up laughing loudly. All around us shoppers stop and stare I try and make him stop but he's unstoppable and unshameable.

Pasta safely stowed in the cart he doesn't put his hand back on the cart, no he slings his arm around me and tucks his thumb in the top of my jeans.

Having made a total spectacle of ourselves we go to the checkouts and unload the cart so the girl can ring our sales up. He's leaning over and murmuring in my ear about the woman five check outs from ours and wondering how the poodle pamper clinic could have been talked into dying her hair for her.

Giggling at him I elbow him softly, "Behave Sebastian," I pretend to be the grown up.

"Or what?" He smirks at me in challenge, but he spoils it when he scrunches up his nose cutely. "I have freckles and I'm not afraid to use them," he says.

Huffing at him I pack away his groceries, "Well I could always forget the dessert after dinner," I mock threaten.

Theatrically he staggers back, "You wouldn't, not dessert, but mon tigre I know how you love dessert…"

"In that case you'll be dessertless and you'll have to live with the knowledge I didn't get dessert either," I stick my nose up, "How could you do that to me Sebastian? Mon Coeur you know I was looking forward to dessert," and he blinks as he realises what I've just called him.

Swiftly moving closer he hugs me and queries, "'My heart'? Really Mr Hummel, in that case I will have to behave and then we can both have dessert and you can tell me again and again how wonderful I am," he lifts my hand up and drops a kiss onto it.

"Oh," the girl on the check out is hugging the pasta, "Oh Mr Hummel," and it's one of the students from Glee.

"Hello Monica," I blush and Sebastian goes on a charm offensive as the poor girl blushes and flutters her eyes at him. He pays for the groceries and we walk out, well we try, I'm hampered by him sticking himself to my side, again.

Reaching the car I make him take the cart back as I put the bags in the car and then I hop in as he comes back so we can go to his.

"I just realised," he frowns, "We didn't pick anything up for dessert," his face falls and then brightens, "Don't worry honey I'll think of something."

"Um, I already brought supplies with me," I point in the back.

"What? All of them?" He's shocked, "Sorry to break the news Kurt but I'm not a teenager anymore and I need more rest, plus even as a teenager that much would have killed me."

"No, not all of it," I clarify, "Just a few select pieces, on the oft chance you would be interested."

Pulling out of the parking lot I catch a glimpse of his face, "Honey I'm nearly always interested, and if it's you, change it to always interested."

Rolling my eyes at him I drive him to his and we bicker over the radio channel and songs the whole way. Then we continue bickering as we walk up his stairs and into his tiny apartment. We keep going as I boil the pasta and cook a very simple meal and only stop so we can eat the food.

The only real place we can eat is on his bed and he's laughing at me, "Seriously every single album?"

"Yes Sebastian I have every single Lady Gaga album, I know all the words and I have a routine for each of them too, if you're nice I might do some of them for you, or…" I pause, " I could do my Single Ladies dance for you," I have kept in dance trim, I live on my own in a very big house and sometimes you have to bust a move, making sure I can do the hip wiggles after all this time takes effort I am happy to put in.

"Wait that was a Beyonce hit not a Gaga one," he frowns and scoops more pasta up.

"Oh I know, believe me I know," I smirk at him, "It's also the same dance I got the McKinley Titans to dance to, on the football field, in front of a home crowd, before Coach Beiste joined and made them Champions. I scored the winning goal kick thingy and got carried off the field on burly jock shoulders and I was made to go to a jock party to celebrate their one and only win that year."

Choking on his food he stares at me, "You were a jock?"

"And a cheerleader," I tell him helpfully just as he takes another mouthful of food. Laughing at his reaction I tease him, "I still have the uniforms somewhere, oh and they made me join the synchronised swim team for a dance number," I shudder in horror, "I got splashed on my face with chlorinated water and it got in my hair and it ruined my skin, and all so Mr Schue to could propose to Miss Pillsbury."

"Huh?" And I have to explain the thing to him which takes us past finishing up our food. We lounge on his bed, "Wait you all got in the pool even the wheel chair kid?" I describe Artie's epic dive, "You're all crazy," he mutters.

"Hey that's your tiger of a boyfriend you're insulting," I prod him in the side and he sniggers, sticking my tongue out at him I take the bowls out and start washing them up, he doesn't have much crockery or cutlery and every little helps, especially for the morning when I am going to demand breakfast in bed from him.

Warm arms wrap around me and he nuzzles my neck, "Ready for dessert?" His breath is hot in my ear and I shudder gripping the flimsy sink waiting for him to start on me.

"Yes," I whimper, the hunger for him from earlier reappearing, "Please Sebastian I'd love dessert now."

Hands squeeze my hips and teeth nibble my ear, "Good because I expect a long and lengthy dessert from you tonight. Are you finished being domesticated in here?"

Empting the sink I leave everything to air dry and let him tug me into the bedroom. His mouth finds mine and I lean into him as his hands slide down my back and squeeze my ass firmly. Whining slightly I buck into that firm sexy body of his and he deepens the kiss.

Breaking the kiss for a few seconds he bites my lip, "Kurt, babe, I can't wait, I need you too much," and we start shedding clothes, I amuse him when I fold mine up and I tsk over him just dumping his on the floor.

Naked and eager I kiss him again and he has to manoeuvre us to the bed and then down onto it. In my last relationship we took turns topping but from what I've heard about Sebastian and from our last encounter I assume he prefers to top, I was drunk the first time so I could have dreamed me topping him.

Briefly we stop so he can snag the lube and I wiggle onto my back spreading my legs for him, just the memory of those long wonderful fingers has me moaning in anticipation.

Kissing me his tongue licks my lips and I let him in wrapping my tongue around his even as I wrap my arms around him, and he makes no move to start prepping me.

I'm not sure how to ask him to do that so I kiss him and then wrap my legs around him, our cocks rub together and we both cry out at the same time, and then he pushes me down to the bed, his green eyes searching mine and then he asks, "Will you top me?"

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	28. Chapter 28

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**28**

"I…" I stare at him in shock I wasn't expecting that. "Do you want me too?" He nods and holds the lube out to me.

Guess I was wrong, I really did top him at the hotel that night.

"Okay Mon Coeur, roll over on your back, let me love you Bastian," I murmur as he does, that long lean body peppered with freckles and it's all mine. Popping the lube I smear my fingers and then double check, "Are you sure? I've really not done this for a while, tell me what you like and don't like, okay?"

"I'll like anything you like," he says but his body's very tense as I reach between his legs and his erection isn't anywhere near as impressive.

Rubbing my fingers around his entrance I lean over him and flick my tongue over his mouth mimicking it. When I probe his mouth I do the same with my finger and then I push inside at the same time.

He's so tight and I freeze as he pants under me, "Sebastian? Bas talk to me…" His eyes have squeezed shut and his hands are bruisingly hard on my arms. "Please le battement de mon Coeur," I babble at him and then, "I'm stopping Bas I'm going to take my finger out now, shh it's okay."

But his hand has wrapped around my arm and he won't let me move, "Bas, come on, it's okay, you can top me, or we can cuddle or something, just please Bas, I don't want to hurt you."

"You're not," he grinds out between his gritted teeth, "I just really need you to do this for me Kurt."

I stop fighting him and move closer cuddling him with my body as much as I can while I rest my head on the curve of his shoulder, "Fine, but I refuse to hurt you Sebastian."

"Good," he whispers and we lie there not doing anything and it's rather embarrassing to have my finger where it is, trapped his in his tight heat as bit by bit his muscles relax around it.

He tries to put his other arm around me and we have to wiggle and then we're cuddling properly and he mutters, "It really doesn't hurt. I thought I must have made up the hotel room in my head."

"So I'm not the only one to think they imagined that then?" I tilt my head to look at him.

A flicker of amusement crosses his face, "No I guess you aren't." He kisses my forehead, "It was so good I thought it had to have been a dream."

So he had enjoyed it at the time too.

Sebastian's body ripples under me and then he's kissing me softly, I'm a little tense not wanting to hurt him but all he seems to want to do is kiss so I reciprocate and then his hips flex making my finger thrust into him, he stiffens up again.

"Bas, why did you do that?" I scold him, "You're not hurt are you?" I try and fuss over him as much as I can as he smiles at me.

"I'm fine Kurt, I'm fine, because it's you, it's you and I'm fine," he goes back to kissing me and I try and squirm away but he's insistent so I play along wondering what's got into him.

"Kurt? Can you do something for me?" He asks and those green eyes are very serious.

"It depends," I'm wary, "tell me what it is and as long as it doesn't involve hurting you I'll consider it."

A huge smile crosses his face, "Thanks and I need you to use that finger of yours in me, I need to feel you inside of me and I don't think I'm up to anything bigger just yet. Sorry to spoil dessert for you," his frowns.

"You haven't spoilt anything," I kiss him, "And if you want me to do this tell me how you prefer to be. On your stomach..." He's already shaking his head, "Okay on your back, and I reserve the right to kiss you and your freckles," he laughs at that so I take advantage and kiss some of the freckles on his chest.

His arms wrap around me and I tentatively pull out of him and very slow push in, he's still tense but his muscles have started to stretch making it easier. Probing him I search for just the right spot and then he grunts arching his back.

Smugly I do it again as he twists and bucks, "Oh Bas, I'm going to enjoy my dessert now."

I get a disbelieving look and then I very carefully try and live up to my boast to him as I continue to push into him and swipe at his prostate. Kissing his neck I trail my lips down his chest and around each of his nipples and give them soft little sucks, I get more grunts and groans from him and I can see he's getting hard again.

Lapping at his collarbone I go back to kissing him lazily as his breathing speeds back up and fine tremors wrack his frame. This is far more fun than it should be. Sebastian Smythe naked and at my mercy, I could get used to this.

Continuing to tease him I'm startled when he pulls his mouth away and drives his head back into the bed even as his hips move hesitantly meeting my finger and pressing me in deeper, "Oh god," he moans, "Kurt."

"Bas," I nuzzle him, "What do you need from me Bas? Tell me what you want darling, let me love you Bas."

"More, just more," he's starting to writhe.

"Do you want another finger? Or do you want me to move faster?" I'm back to being anxious, I really don't want to hurt him, he's loosened up but he's still so very tight.

"Both, please Kurt, both, I trust you, just do it, please," he's starting to fall apart in my arms so I distract him by sucking on a nipple and then I press a second finger into him. "Burns," he hisses, "But good, so fucking good Kurt."

Taking that as encouragement I crook my fingers and he moans again, "Touch yourself Bas, come on Bas," and he doesn't need anymore urging as he begins to pump himself.

"Kurt," he moans louder so I scissor my fingers, "Fuck, babe that's amazing," pushing into him I vaguely remember something he did by twisting his fingers and I must have been successful when he thrashes and cries out, "Kurt! More, god just more."

Aroused I press against his body and redouble my efforts, giving up kissing his mouth as he wont stay still, I assault his nipples and incidentally the freckles that happen to be there too.

I remember doing something similar to him in the hotel room, his cries had been erotic then and are now. And then his hips stop moving and he pants out, "Close, too close, sorry." Those green eyes are completely blown, his skin is sweaty and stunning to take in, his hair is a ruined mess and I did that to him.

Smugly I seek out that spot in him and he whines, "It's okay Bastian, let go, cum for me my meerkat," he huffs at the name, "Mon Coeur, let me see you like you did me when I was on the table, please Bas," I stack the odds in my favour by stroking his prostate again.

"Kurt…" he's struggling to speak so I take pity on him and give him some respite, "Tiger, that's not fair on you."

Touched by that I kiss him, "It's fine Sebastian, I'll let you make it up to me another time, in fact this means I'll be forced to have dinner with you again, to spend time enjoying myself," I give him a big dramatic sigh, "What a cruel and evil boyfriend you are to me."

Chuckling he breathes heavily, "Only if you let me cook for you…"

"Done," I agree and do the twist thing again, "Cum for me Bas, you know you want to, and I promise to let you do this to me."

"Deal," he groans out and then he stops trying to hold himself back as his hand jerks himself off rapidly, for a few seconds his whole body simply stops and then he's crying out my name as thick viscous ropes of cum splatter over his chest and one even lands on his face.

Watching him climax is a sight I don't think I could get enough of anytime soon and then his muscles relax in one go and I can finally remove my fingers from him.

Leaving him to his post orgasm high I wander to the bathroom and grab some tissues and a washcloth, then I clean him up before securing the apartment for the night and snuggling down next to him.

"You didn't cum," he mutters.

"It's not important mon Coeur, go to sleep, but I'm holding you to your promise of cooking for me," I kiss his shoulder and tuck him in.

Tonight might not have gone the way I'd wanted it to but I think I've learnt something about Sebastian and I'm sure it's significant.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Le battement de mon Coeur – the beat of my heart, or what Google Translate tells me it is, again feel free to put me right.


	29. Chapter 29

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**29**

Unfamiliar beeping rouses me and my sheets are hot and wrapped all around me. The sheets groan and turn out to be Sebastian as he bats futilely at his cell phone. The beeping stops and he goes back to defying the laws of physics in getting so close to me nothing could get between us.

My meerkat has his head under my chin and he's mostly on top of me. Wiggling a hand free I stroke the back of his neck and he succeeds in nuzzling in to me.

Dozing in his arms the cell phone starts beeping again and he gives a frustrated grunting groan. This time I lift the phone up and turn the alarm off instead of leaving it on snooze. Prodding my sleepy boyfriend only gets me annoyed huffs so I take the drastic action of squirming out of his embrace and pulling the covers off of him, he's only moving enough to try and get me back into bed with him so I give him a gentle smack on the ass.

"Up," I say innocently at him and get a wicked grin as he points down his body where his erection is indeed obeying me, rolling my eyes at him I tell him I'm going in the shower and he can shower next.

The bathroom is absolutely tiny and I crack my elbow on the tiles wincing as the unfunny sensation of pins and needles momentarily numbs my arm after hitting my funny bone so hard.

Drying I'm surprised he has a few moisturising creams, non perfumed and very manly versions but I avail myself of them, then I root through his small cupboard. It's mostly empty but for his shaving things.

Winding the towel around my waist I find him still in bed, his eyes are open though and I stray a little too close and get pulled into the bed with him, he starts in kissing me, and yes, he's very interested in me physically as his hands start to wander.

Tapping him on the nose I say very clearly, "No Sebastian, we have work to go to," he pouts adorably and I almost give in, "Go and shower I'll make you breakfast."

Going to the kitchen I raid his newly stocked food and make us some cereal. Hmm we didn't get any coffee, I'll drop him off at the Lima Bean and grab myself a cup to get my brain cells firing.

Something important happened last night and I want time to think about it, unfortunately my boyfriend has other ideas and wanders into the kitchen scrubbed clean and naked to snuggle into my back and hinder my breakfast making, I'm in the middle of chopping fruit and have to bitch at him so I can finish.

Putting the knife safely into the sink I turn and kiss Sebastian and then grab the bowls and flee the kitchen for the bedroom, a dangerous place to be with an amorous meerkat in hot pursuit but he behaves long enough for us to eat and then I have to quickly get my clothes back on.

Sprawled out on his bed and with nothing left to the imagination he tries to get me to come and have a hug, since he's sporting a very fine looking erection I sense a trap and refuse, though I rake my eyes down his body, "When was the last time you were tested?" I'm serious.

"Six months ago and I've been a very good boy and not played with anyone but you," he smirks and runs a finger down his chest tracing his own freckles.

I have to clear my throat before I can say, "Well it's been a few years since my last one, I'll get myself retested to be on the safe side and then when the results are through I can enjoy some dessert in the morning," and then to give him a clue I lick my lips and gaze at his straining cock. "I'm sure you'll taste delicious."

Hurrying to the kitchen I laugh a little heartlessly as he yells, "Babe! You do not get to walk away from me after saying that!"

Putting the dishes in to soak I have my shoes on and smirk at him as he walks out of the bedroom trying to do his jeans up over his still very prominent problem, "Tease," he accuses me and then we're ready to leave.

Loading his bike the back of my car he hops in next to me, "Babe payback is a bitch, so when I bury my fingers into you be prepared to hang right on the edge for eternity, I'm going to enjoy making you beg for my cock."

Nearly backing into the car behind me I stare at him and he leans over to kiss me smirking the whole time.

Dropping him off at the Lima Bean for his shift, it's still locked up but as I'm a very recent ex-employee they let me in so I can make my own coffee to go. Everyone's friendly until they learn I stayed over at Sebastian's and then things get a bit frosty.

My boyfriend being who he is simply stirs the whole thing and doesn't seem to have thought it through, he has to work here and then he frowns and wags a finger at them, "Really, what kind of man do you take Kurt for? Shame on you," I can see he's making fun of them but they all stop to stare at me.

"Oh," Katie says and then I get, "God Kurt I'm really sorry, of course you wouldn't have gotten up to anything," and now everyone else is nodding too. Rounding on a shocked Sebastian she shakes her head, "And you, shame on you for letting us think that, Kurt's such a sweet and nice young man, you make sure you stay so respectful to him, he deserves a prince."

Nodding Sebastian even manages to pull off an expression of innocence, something that should be illegal on the grounds of him being far from innocent, his eyes are dancing and I wait for the inevitable words out of his mouth that will wreak everything, "Yeah, he's just so…" he breaks off seemingly overcome but since he's turned into me to hide his face I know he's laughing.

Patting his shoulder comfortingly and refraining from whacking him I have to stand there as they all nod and give us happy smiles and we get called 'adorable'.

Choking back his laughter Sebastian sees me off and then he can't contain it any longer as he crumbles up in the parking lot much like he did when I tried to tell him about Finn and our next-door neighbour.

It's going to be a long day I can just tell.

In control again he sniggers and hugs me, "Have a great day Tiger, I'll see you later and I still owe you for last night…"

"You owe me nothing Bastian, though it might take a while to forgive you for making people think we held hands all night," I sniff, "Why is everyone so surprised that I can attract a very sexy man? One I want to do so many things with, what's wrong with me that they can't accept it?" And it does hurt a bit.

"I have no idea," his hands slide down to cup my butt, "Because Tiger you are seriously hot, I'm surprised no one snapped you up, I know Lima isn't the greatest gathering of all guys gay but damn someone must have hit on you, it's my luck you were picky enough to tell them no," he kisses me and then I really do have to go to work. I don't tell him that no one has hit on me, in fact no one has even looked at me that way since Blaine, apart from him.

Walking in to work I get my overalls on and turning around I find the guys are all gathered with Miguel and Frank standing in front like a pair of ringleaders. "Was there a problem?"

I can't think of one they might have had, I'd locked up and it was all fine.

"Err boss," Frank's blushing. "We heard you stayed over at the Smythe kid's place last night," I nod wondering who the hell told him that, "Look if he's hassling you to go faster than you want, you just let us know," and they all grumble menacingly.

Oh dear.

I'm glad Sebastian isn't here to stir it up even more and while I appreciate them looking after me I'm old enough and big enough to take care of myself and I mock them gently echoing Sebastian's earlier words, "What kind of a guy do you take me for?" Meaning that I'd bitch Bas out if he pushed me further than I wanted to go, yes he is clinging but he doesn't push, he might coax and get handsy but I have noticed those hands stay strictly away from certain areas at that point.

And then they all nod and look relieved as Miguel smiles at me, "That's good boss, we're glad he's behaving, there's no need to rush into that area of stuff, you make sure he treats you right."

They're all crazy.

It must be something in the water, after all this time I've become immune but they're suffering the effects. I'm not a girl, and I'm happy with the physically intimate things I've done with Sebastian so far and the things I plan to do with him in the future.

Rolling my eyes at them I start on the first car and ignore all their fond gazes and murmurings of getting Bas alone to educate him on getting me flowers and things. Sebastian started this in the Lima Bean he can face the fall out of the crazy peoples' ideas I'm not saving him, but I do text him a heads up at lunchtime.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	30. Chapter 30

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**30**

Friday night is family night and I stretch out my back waving the guys off, their offer this morning was sweet but annoying. And all our customers today have heard about me staying at Sebastian's but the line of what kind of man I am stops them in their tracks and they all nod.

Exactly what they think we did last night is up in the air. Maybe they think Sebastian let me have the bed while he slept on the couch he doesn't own, or that he took the floor in a show of gentlemanship that is sadly lacking these days.

The garage is locked up nice and tight so I drive home humming along to the radio. Walking into the house I call out to let them know I'm there and add, "I just need to shower and then I'm ready for Breakdstix!" With their fake everything, even if their cheesecakes are sublime and so full of calories they should be illegal.

"I can scrub your back for you Tiger," Sebastian's leaning in a doorway and smirking at me, he looks very fetching in a shirt and tie.

"Sebastian!" I dance over to him and kiss him.

"Kurt," it's dad, "Sebastian's joining us for family night, go dress up kiddo."

"Okay," I'm ridiculously pleased that dad wants my meerkat to be there with us. Beaming I walk towards the stairs, "Be down soon."

Hurrying through my shower, though I'm careful to rub my own lotion on first, I grab some nice dress pants and blue shirt with matching tie. Skipping down the stairs I aim straight for Sebastian and hug him, his arm automatically wraps around me holding me there, I could get used to this.

Now all I have to do is hide the shotgun and make dad behave the whole way through dinner, I'll ask Carole to keep an eye on him. Finn's bouncing around and he loves Breadstix, I'll have to remember to pay attention to him and his ramblings and we can do some brotherly bonding. David and Kyle are joining us too I'm glad dad and David have learnt to get along so well.

Offering to drive I stand by the door and pull my boots on lacing them up the front, my reasons for hanging onto the boots are that they are boy clothes, comfortable, practical, and make my legs look fantastic.

"I'm up front," Finn runs to the van door and climbs in, he really doesn't change.

It's a good thing dad hires big people carriers for these summer things and I'm just about to pull out of the yard when Carole asks Sebastian if we had fun last night and how did dinner go.

"The grocery shopping and dinner were lovely and you know what kind of man Kurt is..." Which prompts dad and Finn to immediately veto any details of the night, Carole giggles and David and Kyle want all the details later. "Damn I've used that line all day at the Lima Bean and everyone's just cooed and said what a nice young man Kurt is."

Laughter starts up and I glare out of the windshield and grumble as they tell tales to Sebastian about what a scheming bossy little thing I am. He joins in the laughter and I huff in annoyance as I park up at Breadstix, "All right you can all get out now you've finished vilifying me to my new boyfriend."

"Oh come on bud," Dad claps me on the shoulder, "I haven't even started on the baby pictures and stories yet, that's for the next time Sebastian comes over."

An arm winds its way around me and I let Bas lead me to my doom, I was looking forward to dinner too. At least this for this dinner I won't have to worry about them bashing Sebastian, they've invited him along and they're accepting him.

Sitting down we go through the limited menu and Bas' face as he reads it is funny, "The cheesecake is good," I murmur to him.

"Hmm, I was hoping for a different kind of dessert," he murmurs back and I squirm slightly and blush.

The waitress takes our order and both Carole and I watch dad like hawks, he knows what we're doing and toys with the idea of the unheart healthy dish, but changes his mind at the last second to the boring heart healthy dish instead.

When she gets to me the woman is a bit frosty and drops into the conversation that she knows what I got up to last night and I can't believe these people have the gall to tell me what to do in my own relationship, Sebastian steps in as dad looks angry and ready to snarl at her, "Oh please," Sebastian scrunches his face up, "You know kind of a guy Kurt is," he rubs his nose against mine, "Ah mon bel homme."

"Oh," she apologises for a few minutes and then takes our order while cooing at us and saying, "I'm so sorry, Kurt's such a sweet young man, oh you really are an adorable couple," which Bas plays up to and has fun with.

They wait until she's out of hearing range and then David asks, "What the fuck just happened?"

"Language," dad tells him and adds, "But what he said, have you two really had to put up with that all day?"

"Yes," Sebastian scoots closer to me, "She was polite about it, the rest had things to say to me, mostly to do with respecting such a fine upstanding citizen and how they voted for his daddy."

"Sebastian," I turn to him worried, "My customers were nicer but seemed to think you were taking advantage of me. I put them right," I don't mention I did it by parroting back his words he'll be insufferable if he finds out.

Unfortunately it sets the tone for our dinner. People keep coming up to my dad while we eat, not unusual in itself but it's clear they're telling him all about me, in the end dad falls back on Sebastian's comment and they all leave us alone.

Stressed and frazzled we go home and dad invites Sebastian in, he even mentions that I'm old enough to have anyone I want to stay the night and then we veg out in the living room and argue over what film to watch.

It's getting late when Sebastian says he has to go home and I walk him out the garage, "You could stay over," I offer, "Dad doesn't mind and I like sleeping with you and waking up with you."

"Good," he kisses me as he wheels his bike out and checks his lights. "But today has been a very long day," he smirks, "And as fun as it was to annoy people I think we need to behave tonight."

Oh no, don't say they've frightened him off, "Sebastian don't leave, they'll get used to us, really," I hold onto his arm, "Give it another chance."

Glancing at my hand on his arm and then back to me he pulls me into a hug, "I meant, lets act like we're behaving tonight, I'll scandalise them another time, relax, I still have to pay you back yet. Speaking of, let me know when you're going for your medical, I'll join you and we can both have squeaky clean records, then I owe you dessert."

Whacking his arm gently I agree and lean into him for a kiss that he just has to take over and deepen as I cling to him, "Cycle carefully and let me know when you're home safe and sound."

"Yes dear," he sounds henpecked and then rides down the yard to the road, I get a brief wave and he's gone.

Going inside I fake tiredness but David's watching me and so is Carole, I know they're going to grill me about last night in the morning. Dad jerks his head I follow him into his study, "Well I have to say I was worried, I know the kid's reputation, and he didn't live up to it at all. Kid's really turned himself around, he's going to stay a bit of a joker but he's smart enough to keep up with you and the way he looked at you didn't hurt. I'm glad he's changed so much."

"Thanks dad," I hug him, it means a lot to me that he approves of my meerkat.

"There's just one last thing Kurt, if anything bad happens you know you can come to me, I still have a shotgun and I know some guys that will help me bury the body where no one will ever find it," he has his blank face on so I'm not sure if he's making a joke or not.

"Dad!"

"Night Kurt," he shoos me out.

Stalking up the stairs I fall onto my bed and grin, today might have been very annoying but things are good, I even get a message from him letting me know he's home safe.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	31. Chapter 31

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**31**

It's been a week, well just over a week, it's now Saturday. I've not seen him once, he messages me to beg off seeing me, he's not done one flying visit and with the surprise party coming up I've been so busy dodging David I've not had a moment to go to him either.

And people are still interfering in MY life. Complete strangers think they can give me advice on Sebastian just because they voted for my dad, the line about what kind of man I am is still working but I shouldn't have to use it.

I didn't even get to see Sebastian when I went for my tests, he couldn't get in at the same time and scheduled an earlier day.

Worried I lay in bed and stare at the ceiling.

Dad had said it was a good thing Sebastian had changed, that he'd grown up, but what if the man has changed too much and his natural Sebastian-ness to pursue things he wants has changed too?

Rolling over I glare at the clock, it's too early in the morning to be putting myself through this. I've promised to go to Dalton today and help with their summer choir program, I generally point them in the direction of music they want and veto the riskier things as inappropriate.

I try not to listen to the nasty little voice in my head that asks me if the reason he's stopped pursuing is because he's had enough of me, that he thinks I'm not worth pursuing, which leaves me back in my normal position of pursuing the guy I'm attracted too.

My friends aren't that supportive of my new fledging relationship and some of them are very eager to point out how much Sebastian had disliked me when we were teens, how very little he'd thought of me then, how he'd insulted me constantly.

Running away from the nagging doubts I pound the pavements for a while jogging in the early summer sun and breathing in the fresh air. As I come home again I pass by the evil neighbour who's standing in her garden, does the woman never sleep? She gives me the evil eye and I have to stop when I get to the patch of grass Sebastian had collapsed on and I can see him clearly as he'd howled with laughter.

Determined I march into the house, I'm going to make time to see him at the Lima Bean before I have to go to Dalton, I will not jump to conclusions, I will wait and see, he's probably been working on his writing or pulling double shifts to get some money in.

He called me beautiful.

Showering, I can't resist the allure of the scales and I'm right where I should be, I pinch my stomach to be on the safe side and that's fine too. Checking my face I can't see many lines, well any really. Smearing on cream I go to get dressed for the day.

Bolting my breakfast I can barely swallow the fruit down, but dad and I have had rules on this for years and I stick to them now. I take a pear with me just in case I get hungry later.

I know the perfect flower shop and I pace waiting for them to open and there is the perfect flower for my boyfriend. The shop has these fancy little mobile vases and I get one as I know Sebastian doesn't have any in his apartment.

Driving to the Lima Bean I park and hide the flower behind my back, they're open and Sebastian's not serving he's cleaning tables, he looks tired and the treacherous voice in my head says he's tired because he's been fooling around or something else uninnocent and nefarious.

Squashing the voice I sneak up on my boyfriend, "Morning Sebastian."

Startled and shocked he stares at me for a few moments too long and I panic and shove the bright star shaped flower at him, "Here, it's a tiger lily because I missed you, I've not seen you for days and I wanted you to know I've been thinking about you and missing you. David and Kyle's party is soon, as you're my boyfriend you're invited of course and I've really missed you."

Transferring his stare from me to the flower he keeps staring and then takes it from me as my stomach rolls and I have to hide the gag, I will not throw up my breakfast, I haven't done that since I was in High School, I'm an adult I can control my stomach.

Too late, remembering the bad times of High School makes me remember the way Sebastian used to call me a girl, the way he'd mocked my clothes and now I've only gone and handed him a flower, a very girly thing to do.

Doing my best to ignore the rush of nagging doubts I wait for him to make it better, to make me feel better.

One of his long fingers trails down a petal and I try and think of something nice to say to him, an opening gambit of conversation that will fix everything somehow. My mind goes blank and from the recesses of my brain comes a sentence and I blurt, "Te sunt pulchra."

Frowning he says, "That's not French, is it Italian?" And I go pale as I realise I've just called him beautiful in Latin.

Come on Kurt you can fix this, you're a grown adult man, you're not a teenager anymore you can do this, laugh it off and never mention it again, he might think you're an idiot but that's all.

"Ego amare," I say in a soft breathy voice and the memory of me as a teen as I told Finn that I honestly loved him while in a dumb crush with him makes my stomach kick a few times. The similarities are to now are, well, just too similar.

Swaying slightly I back up a few steps intending to flee and hope he gets momentary amnesia to sweep this new embarrassing and humiliating experience under the carpet where it can never see the light of day.

Why do I always do this? Why do I over do everything and rush in? Because I've just told Sebastian I love him in Latin, which he thankfully doesn't understand.

Tilting his head he studies me and he's too smart I have to create a brand new strategy to escape this and then he asks, "Are you alright?"

"Fine, I'm fine, I just have to leave as I said I'd go to Dalton and help them with their show choir thing," my laugh is high pitched and fake and oh no he's frowning again. "Anyway I'll leave you to your work, sorry to interrupt, call me okay," he's not going to call, I just know he's not going to call, I will not sit by my phone moping, I have a party to plan, I will be an adult and ignore the pain in my chest and the way my stomach is heaving.

"Kurt," the way he says my name makes me pause in hope, "We really need to talk," and he's so serious my hope takes a giant nose dive to end in an even bigger crash and burn incident.

We need to talk is code for 'Kurt mommy's sick', 'Kurt mommy's dead', 'Kurt you're not sexy', 'Kurt guys don't sing girl songs it's weird dude', 'Kurt I'm sorry but we're breaking up', 'Kurt Hummel we're sorry but the place is going to Rachel Berry', we need to talk is never good.

Forcing a smile I nod, "Okay, we'll talk," we won't, you have no idea how ninja like I can be when I'm avoiding people, I had a lot of practice in high school, "Goodbye Sebastian," I edge towards the door and I really want to hug him one last time but I don't.

He doesn't even say goodbye he only frowns harder and then I drive to Dalton and fall back on the calm easygoing relaxed role of Mr Kurt Hummel, the man that helps the kids and encourages them, who helps them find their own dreams. I must remember not to pull a Mr Schue and involve them with my life by making them serenade the object of my desires.

I promised David I wouldn't go back to sleep, I promised him I would live and I will because this time my entire future isn't wrapped in one boy and college, I have other things now.

Things like these boys, I clap their performance and I'll let them bask in that glow before I nudge them gently here and there to make it better. I also let some of the backing singers have their moment in the limelight we all need that sometimes.

I will continue to help the bullied and the bullies, to educate them all, I'll volunteer at Glee and Cheerleading practice. I'll run a successful business and employ people in this town. And I'm going back to school, perhaps I'll take a refresher course in French or Latin.

It's my life, and I'm going to live it, just not with Sebastian, I can't believe he's bored with me already but I'll move on, eventually, I just have to wait for my heart to mend, again.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Right now I'm going to try and murder the Latin language, again blame Google Translate:

Te sunt pulchra – you are beautiful

Ego amare – I love you

Plus thank you for all favs, alerts and reviews :) And not long to go now, we're nearly at chapter 39 :)


	32. Chapter 32

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**32**

Operation Avoid the Meerkat is in full swing. I'm not having to work too hard at it, I only have a few missed calls and texts from him each day, it's child's play. I'm careful to shop away from anywhere within easy cycling distance of him and the rest sorts itself out.

My family are frowning at me but I'm snowballing them by throwing myself at the barbeque with such enthusiasm they don't suspect a thing, I'm hiding behind the excuse of it being so great to see everyone and this is the last year we'll be able to do this as a big group as everyone is vanishing off to new jobs and new lives.

With only minor scheming I convince Finn to go out for the day with me and I take the day off at the garage. Coincidently the day falls on Sebastian's day off but I'm unfortunately out of town with Finn, bonding in a brotherly fashion, together, here's me being selfless and brotherly to Finn. I'm practically a saint and an incredibly good brother to my bro Finn.

Pleased I happily drive us home after an incredibly long day at the fun fair, I've even relented and eaten some junk food, we've been on all the rides, most of them twice. We've talked, we've laughed and my sides ache from laughing at him on the carousel holding a teddy bear.

We sing along to the radio and this is nice, I've missed him more than I realised. He's playing on his cell phone as we harmonise, he even duets with me on a few love songs.

Parking up at home I skip up the yard, "Finn that was a really great day out, we should do that more often," grabbing him in a hug I tell him, "I love you brother dearest."

"Love you too bro," he gives me a goofy grin and hands me back my cell phone, oh, he'd been playing with my cell on the way back. Sneakily I check my texts but he hasn't sent any and I've not had any from Sebastian today so that's good.

Really no texts are good, they are, it means he can move on, I can move on and we'll both be fine. We can put this whole thing behind us, he'll leave Lima and I'll stay here.

"Kurt," Carole ambushes me and looks guilty, "Dave's been hanging around all day, I've not been able to get any of these things, can you be a dear and get them for me?"

Glancing at the piece of paper she's shoved into my hands I nod, "That's fine," I'm tired and I want to sit down but I leave the house and run errands for her.

I'm only gone an hour and I hide the things in my car, I carry in a cheesecake to disguise my absence and call out "I'm home." There's a slight crash from the back of the house and a yell of 'Finn!' and then suddenly Carole's there chattering away and the cheesecake is being divided up as the others appear from the back acting suspiciously.

Narrowing my eyes I let it slide for now, I'll deal with them later. Tomorrow is the last day of planning and David and Kyle are still under the impression it's a normal party and barbeque.

I sleep badly and dream of Sebastian again, of being wrapped up in his arms, of green eyes that gaze into mine. Headachey and upset I fake sweetness and light all day at the garage until my head is blinding me and I'm forced to go home to take medication for it.

Crawling into bed I curl up in a ball in my nice dark room. Horney gets a giant hug and when dad comes to check on me I whine at him like a petulant child, because it really hurts.

"I know Kurt, your mom got them too when she was stressing out too much and overdoing it, I know just the trick to make it better," and then he leaves me, he must mean sleep.

Tucking my head under the blankets I drift off only to dream of Sebastian again, he's here in my room, "Mon tigre," his voice is soothing, "Kurt," a warm lean body slides in next to mine and fingers stroke the nape of my neck. Uncurling I wiggle closer to him and breathe him in.

Wrapping myself around him I doze off muttering, "Te sunt pulchre, so beautiful. Ego amare, ego amare."

Dream Sebastian asks me what it means and I tell him, his body stiffens so I kiss his shoulder, "Sh, just a dream, s'okay mon Coeur I know you're not real, not really here, you don't want me anymore, s'okay, just a dream."

"Not here?" He grunts sounding annoyed.

"Sh, you're pulsu cor meum," I cuddle in and the pain is starting to fade, his fingers go back to caressing my neck as he asks me what that means, "'S'rough, not right, but roughly? 'The beat or pulse of my heart'," I yawn and get sucked down.

My dream whispers into my ear, "You really are crazy mon amour," and I know he's a dream because he just called me his love.

It's dark when I wake up and I'm so warm. I nuzzle into my very comfy pillow and it moves under my cheek. In fact my sheets are moving too and then I blearily peer into tired green eyes.

"Morning Kurt," he whispers and then Sebastian is kissing me, I'm too surprised to protest and when his tongue slides in I somehow end up tangling my fingers into this hair and pull him down on top of me. He doesn't fight me and his hands start to roam over my body causing me to buck into him, "Ah Mon Tigre, as much as I want to do this we still have to talk."

"No, no talking Bas, just kiss me first," I try to kiss him but he won't cooperate, "Please Sebastian, it's okay I know you're leaving me, that's what you want to talk about..."

"What?" The body on top of mine freezes and he's glaring at me, "That's why you've been avoiding me? You buy me a flower, the first I've ever had by the way and I want more, then you avoid me while I wonder what the hell I've done wrong to the point where I came to see your dad and grovelled on my day off..."

He's not just glaring he's shaking in anger, getting off me he storms out of the bedroom and I run after him not wanting him to leave. It's a stupid fear as he's in boxers and a t-shirt, he's not even wearing socks. I follow him into the kitchen and the harsh glare of the lights at three am are momentarily blinding.

"Where the hell is the ice-cream?" He's rummaging around in the freezer. Pulling out the frozen veg he crows and slams the tub on the table. Awkwardly I stand there and watch him fill a bowl up with ice-cream and then put the frozen things away.

Going to the cupboard he looks at me, "Do you want sauce?" I shake my head and he grabs a spoon, the bowl, and then my hand as he storms past me and back up the stairs to my room. Pointing at the bed he says, "Sit."

So I sit.

Crowding in next to me he pushes me along and then we're both in the bed and he puts a small amount of ice-cream on the spoon and shoves it into my mouth before taking some for himself.

Silently we eat the ice-cream and I'm really confused because he's still angry but the dairy product is calming him down to the point that he laps at the spoon with his tongue and I have to shift a little at the images that conjures up.

Scraping the bottom of the bowl he sighs and puts the empty dish on the side.

Turning back to me he pounces and mock wrestles me to the bed, leaning over me he stares into my eyes, "Kurt, you have got to be the most annoying, complicated guy I know. Even women can't be as confusing and contradictory as you are. You do not give flowers to guys and then avoid them because you think you're breaking up. So we are going to talk about this, I looked online under relationships and most of it is a pile of touchy feely emotional trash aimed at women, and as girly as you act, you're not a girl but a guy so talk..."

And then he waits as I stare up at him.

Huffing he flops onto my chest, "Seriously Kurt what the hell set that off? What did I do wrong to make you think I wasn't interested? Should I have text you more, invited you over for a sleepover, done dinner, movie, what?"

"You said we needed to talk..." And I spill about how it doesn't end well for me and I was trying to get out of it with some dignity intact.

"You are such a guy," he wiggles and props himself up on his elbows, "I try and have a serious talk to you about us and our relationship and you freak out on me, but I can see why, so instead of talking, how about we give communicating a go instead? Okay?"

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Oh look, more bad translations:

Pulsu cor meum – the beat of my heart (Latin)

Mon amour – My love (French)


	33. Chapter 33

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**33**

"Okay," I agree and slide my hands up his back, then I wrap my legs around one of his so he can't move away from me.

"Good, since I'm the one who wanted to communicate I'll go first," he shifts slightly, "You're my first boyfriend and I happily admit I have no idea what the hell I'm doing, I've always been too busy being wrapped up in myself and my wants to give a thought about what anyone else wanted or needed, so if I mess up I need you to tell me and we can work on fixing it together, okay?"

"Okay," that I'm happy to agree to that, "But I'm not sure I'm much better at being in a relationship than you are, you're only my second boyfriend, I couldn't have been that good if the first one didn't fight to stay with me. So you have to tell me if I mess up."

"Deal," he kisses me softly. "Now the big bit, friend me on Facebook and change your damn status from single to in a relationship with me. Unless you don't want people to know about us," and he's tensed up.

"Give me my phone and I'll do it now," he lets me up as we both log on and then both our statuses get updated.

We swop a few other accounts and follow each other, he says we can stay in touch more easily this way and that he can stalk me if I go crazy and vanish off the face of the earth again.

Awkwardly we sit there and stare at each other until I giggle, it's all so silly and the amount of effort I went into to avoid him and all he wanted was to simply update my status. It sets him off and we cuddle as we laugh.

"Damn this relationship stuff is harder than it looks," he muses and pulls me closer, "And scarier than it should be."

"I know," I snuggle closer, "It's like there's so much riding on one word, or a gesture, so much to go wrong over one stupid little thing."

"Hmm," his hands tighten on me, "So today is Dave and Kyle's big day then," he changes the subject.

"Yes, everything's ready, they think it's just a big barbeque, the last big one in case no one comes back to Lima next summer," I smirk happy to have schemed this under David's radar. "I can't wait to see their faces when they realise it's really an engagement party." Frowning I mention, "Though I do wish I could have talked David's dad into ditching his wife for a few hours so he could come and wish his son some future happiness. Why do some families have to be like that Bas? Why can't they be more like my dad and Carole?"

Stiffening in my arms he shrugs, "Wish I knew, and I wish parents came with a receipt so you could send them back and get a refund," his voice has turned dark.

"Sorry," I kiss him, "I didn't mean to upset you."

"You didn't," he kisses me back lingering a little, "I'm just going to be glad when father marries that gold digging tramp and then he'll leave me alone for a while, I can do without his ranting lectures on my familial duties to him and how great it is to be a lawyer."

Running fingers through his hair I comfort him, "I'm sorry your dad tries to tell you what to do with your life, thank god I got my dad as a dad, he doesn't believe me when I threaten to send his name in as dad of the year. And just so you know, you should carry on writing and one day you are going to let me read some of it too. I'm sure you're going to do well and one day your writing is going to win awards and be in best-selling lists."

If anything he blushes and that is so unSebastian like that I stop talking and gape at him, he wiggles and looks embarrassed at me. Holding up a finger he gets out of bed to grab his work tablet from a bag on the floor and turning it on cuddles back up to me.

Tapping on the screen he holds it out to me, "Here, read this."

Taking it from him I can see he's opened a document and it's part of a chapter, reading it I'm impressed with the neat yet descriptive writing style and it takes me a few minutes of speed reading to realise I'm reading a romance, a hetero romance.

Blinking I check the title and headings, it's currently untitled but the author is a Jade Allson.

"I write under another name," he admits and then it clicks and my mouth drops open in surprise, because Sebastian Smythe writes romance, "This is my third book, I wrote the first two in college. The first one was a writing challenge and I loved it, I really did, and my teachers encouraged me to send it off, they even helped me find the right publishers and then instead of a rejection slip they said they wanted it and…"

"Oh," I don't know what to say, "Oh."

"Is 'oh' good?" He asks.

"Oh is very good, I'm just stunned, I had no idea what you wrote but I never would have thought you'd pick romance," I'm babbling, "That came out wrong, I didn't mean it how it sounded…"

It just makes him laugh silently, "No I totally get it, you should have seen my teacher's face when I handed in the short story I did, that eventually became the first book, she stared at me and asked why I hid that much of myself away, and thus began the write a novel challenge."

"Oh," I seem to be stuck just saying that and my eyes are drawn back down to the tablet and I read a tiny bit more and, "What happens next?"

"Hmm? Oh I haven't finished writing it, everything's arced out, I have all the backgrounds and things, I just have to finish researching some more notes on getting barnacles off the bottom of a small boat."

"Barnacles?" There are barnacles in the book?

"Yeah, they're going to bond over the barnacle scraping, so I need to know how to do that in order to put it in the book," he points at the tablet, "That bit is just after they meet and they're attracted but manage to screw everything up and end up disliking each other through misunderstandings and false assumptions."

"Oh," I shift in the bed, "So how much longer is it going to take you to write it?" I'm not that impatient but I'd like to know, "And I'm always here to read things for you if you need feedback or anything," I'm happy to offer.

A pair of green eyes fasten onto mine, "Kurt, mon bel homme, are you really saying you want to read more of my work or are you just trying to get me naked and in your bed?"

"Technically you're already in my bed," I point out, "And I can't help it if you appear to be a talented writer can I?" I hand the tablet back, "And if I happen to be able to read what you write before anyone else, well I have to have some privileges as your boyfriend."

Chuckling he turns the tablet off and we go back to snuggling, "Oh so being my boyfriend comes with reading privileges does it? In that case I'll send you over the manuscripts for the first two books and the three short erotica stories I did…"

"You wrote erotica?" Now that sounds much more like the Sebastian I used to know.

"Hmm, yep, two of the them are hetero," I wrinkle my nose, "But one of them is two guys, I'll send you that one over," he teases me.

Settling back down to sleep I'm nice and warm and loved and yes I over reacted but things are good between us again and I've finally found out what Sebastian writes.

"Kurt?" His voice is soft.

"Hmm?" I'm so close to falling asleep.

"Did you really like my writing?"

"Yes Bas, I really liked your writing," I kiss his shoulder as it's the closest thing to my mouth.

"Good, night mon amour," I think he murmurs.

"Night cor meum," I think I say in reply.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Yes, I know, Bas as a romance writer? But can't you just hear that voice of his breathing in your ear as he reads over the top romantic stuff that leads to smutty things?…


	34. Chapter 34

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**34**

A little stressed I might have snapped at dad a time or two until he told me to calm down or to go sit on the steps to calm down. He doesn't understand this is the day of the big party and nothing is going right.

I'm so out of practice when it comes to organising these things and then Sebastian steps up and between us we get it all done with an hour to spare. Standing back I eye up the banners in the back yard with a critical eye as Sam wobbles on a stepladder ready to move them the tiny distance if I so direct him to.

"That's perfect Sam," I call out and the affable blond nods.

Sebastian eyes him up and mutters in my ear, "And you're sure he's straight?"

"Dodgy hair dye aside he insists he's not gay," I whisper back, "I've only ever seen him interested in girls before, as far as I know he's never chased guys."

"If you say so Tiger," Sebastian is as sceptical as I am about Sam, maybe the guy has Bi leanings, typical that he wouldn't be interested in me but at least it means he's not interested in Sebastian either.

Having checked everyone's clothing choices and deemed them appropriate I saunter off to go and get changed for the day. The theme is casual as both David and Kyle prefer that, though David always looks good in a suit and frankly it's not worth the fight I'd have with Kyle to make him dress up, plus the moment my back was turned he'd be in jeans. Better to pick your battles and I'm saving everything for the wedding day suits, he will be dressed up and he will stay like that until his wedding night, at that point they really don't need me to interfere.

Also there's a pool at this party, I shudder to think of nice clothing getting drenched.

Humming in the shower I dry my hair and style it to look careless and then I strut to my room as Sebastian goes to shower and as much I would love to join him I don't want to be late to the party.

Pulling on my own clothes I linger long enough that Sebastian saunters in with just a towel, a towel he drops with a smirk as Finn unwittingly passes by and yelps covering his eyes and walking into a wall, "Door dudes! DOOR!" He yells and Bas laughs a little heartlessly.

"Mean," I tease Sebastian who still doesn't close the door, the man really does have no shame.

Sitting next to me on the bed he kisses me, "If we had some more time I'd show you just how mean I can be, after all I do owe you for your teasing behaviour the other day Tiger, you can't tell me about feeding you breakfast and then not expect me to retaliate."

"Was that me?" I try for innocence, "Sebastian what kind of man do you take me for?"

"A sexy one," he growls and pounces, wrestling me to the bed he drops kisses all over my face, "A hot sexy one who's all mine."

Laughing at him I shriek when he starts tickling me, "Sebastian, no stop, that tickles," launching my own offensive manoeuvres I grapple him and end up on top with his hands pinned, "Ha, serves you right."

"DUDES!" Finn's back at the door, "Seriously, door!"

Waggling his hands Sebastian lays the blame on me, "But Finn he pinned me again, it's not my fault."

"Kurt, bro really…" And Finn closes my bedroom door with a slam. He misses the way Sebastian rolls up laughing at him.

"Yep you are mean to him," I admonish and tap him on the butt, "Now get dressed and try to act like an adult at the party."

Pouting he stretches out on my bed like sin made flesh, "Oh Kurt? I got my medical results back…" He eyes me up, "And I'm clear, I have the results if you need to see them."

Shaking my head I step back from the temptation that is Sebastian being seductive, "That's fine, I believe you and yay my own results came back clean too…"

"That's good then, because I'm staying over tonight and you have an obscene amount of lube that will run out of date if we don't start on it soon," he's smirking at me and his body likes that idea as does mine.

Clearing my throat I have to flee the room or jump him, "Ngrgh?" Running I can hear him laughing at me and I lean on the wall to calm down in a completely different way.

Bustling about the back yard and double checking everything I hear some cars drawing up, my watch says who ever it is has turned up a whole ten seconds early and I let myself fall into host mode.

I used to think it was strange that people turned up when ever they felt like it to other peoples' parties but were always on time to mine, until Puck let slip how they were just all scared what I'd do to them if they were late. It does make planning a party easier if everyone turns up more or less on time.

The two guests of honour still have no idea and are mingling with their guests as the barbeque is heating up nicely. Puck has kindly donated a pool and it's now full so he'll announce it's open in a few minutes probably by getting in it and showing off his chest.

Out of the corner of my eye I see Sebastian flitting in and out of the house carrying trays of food and drinks with Carole. They're talking and I'm glad he's getting on so well with my family.

Doing a quick head count everyone invited is here, it's a depressingly small number of people to be at an engagement party but hopefully the quality of people will make up for the quantity.

With a prearranged signal I get Sam and Mike to casually get into position and then with a tug of a rope a sign reading 'Congratulations Dave and Kyle!' unfolds.

Glee fuelled mayhem ensues and at one point the couple are picked up and thrown into the pool and swimwear is universally revealed on the guests so they can all join in. It's pure chaos at its best with the pair of them right in the middle of it grinning like idiots.

"Well they look happy," Sebastian's snuck up behind me.

"They do, don't they," I sigh contentedly and lean back into him. "Thank you for all your help in getting this ready for them."

"It was my pleasure," his hands rest on my hips, "And it was fun too. Who knew my past misadventures in scheming could come in so useful and so strangely productive?"

In the pool a splashing war or more accurately riot has erupted and everyone is going crazy. I think that David and Kyle are going to remember this for the rest of their lives for all the right reasons. It's a good start to their new beginning together.

"Oh Bas, now we've managed to pull this off, don't think you're getting out of helping me with their wedding, if you thought I was out of control and high on power just wait until I have the wedding planner in tears and threatening to quit as I railroad everyone into my dream wedding for them…"

"Your dream wedding?" He questions, and eyes me up.

"I guy can dream," and then I wince because I've pretty much given up dreams for myself. His hands tighten on my hips and his head tilts, his mouth hovers near mine and for a few precious moments I wonder if I can get away with dreaming about him.

"Kurt," It's Blaine, he's dripping wet and standing only a few feet from us. The gel these days is far more waterproof so it doesn't run and his hair doesn't frizz out.

"Blaine?" I turn to him and stay nestled up to Bastian.

"We need to talk," my ex says firmly and I narrow my eyes at the way he's glaring at Sebastian.

"No we don't," I put my hands on top of Sebastian's and stand there staring Blaine down.

"Yes we do," he's using his reasonable tone on me, "Please Kurt, I don't want to see you get hurt."

I don't want to see me get hurt either but I stand my ground.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	35. Chapter 35

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**35**

"Kurt," Blaine takes a step forwards and I back further into Sebastian, "Kurt this isn't like you, you're too sensible…"

And a chuckle is ghosted into my ear by a certain chipmunk, it earns him another glare from Blaine, "Sorry don't mind me, please keep going, it's amusing to watch."

"Everything's a game to you isn't it Smythe," Blaine snaps, "Well Kurt's not a game, he's special and you're not going to hurt him."

"I know I'm not going to hurt him," Bas' hands slide from my hips around to press on my stomach while his arms effectively trap me there. "Mon Tigre is more than capable of standing up to me, and he makes me happy so there's no reason to leave," my heart beats painfully at that. "And since mommy and daddy don't get to dictate my love life I won't skip off to summer camp and lose someone precious to me."

Ouch that had to hurt and Blaine does wince, "You don't understand."

"Oh I understand," the voice at my ear turns cold, "I've met your parents, walk away from them Anderson, you'll never please them, they'll never fully accept you," one arm lets me go so he can wave around us, "You've clearly got family here that gives a crap about you, one day you can bring a guy home and you'll get this crazy insanity too. So butt out and let Kurt get on with his life, here, with me."

"He belongs in New York," those brown eyes narrow, "He should be on a stage somewhere, he's too talented to stay here, there's a whole world he should be taking by storm."

"He's already taking the world by storm," Sebastian snarks back, "And if he wants to go to New York he can, I can write anywhere," oh, Sebastian would really go with me? "He can go anywhere he wants to and I'll happily go with him," his hand is fisting my t-shirt like he'll never let me go. "If he wants to stay here we'll stay here."

Oh, no ones ever said something so romantic to me before, "Sebastian," I murmur and I lean into him more, "I'm happy to stay in Lima," it's my home, "Though I reserve the right to go to exotic locals on vacation, or to change my mind in the future."

"Whatever you want Kurt," His eyes soften as they look into mine. "Just so long as you're there."

"He's playing you," Blaine breaks in, "Or have you forgotten all the insults he used to throw at you when we were younger, how you were too girly, he never wanted you then," and all my fears rush back.

"Well I'm not seventeen anymore," is the quick fire retort, "I know what I want now," and I'm pressed more firmly into his chest, "And I don't give up easily once I have what I want in my sights."

That declaration should be creepy but I'm thrilled by it and the knowledge that he came looking for me and was even prepared to grovel because he thought he must have done something wrong.

In the pool the whole thing has reached a crescendo and it distracts Blaine enough to twist and glance behind him so I peck Bas on the cheek and drag him away from the fight and over to the pool to egg them all on while staying back to keep dry.

"Thank you," I whisper into Sebastian's ear.

"For what?" He's busy watching Kyle climb onto David's shoulders to gain height for a prat fall into to the water.

"Saying such nice things about me," I'm fairly sure this thing between us is going to end in tears and heartbreak, but I'm enjoying it too much to be sensible. "It was sweet."

Snorting he mutters, "I don't do sweet, I do do truthful though, and I'll do my best to be honest with you. I really did mean that I would happily follow you to New York if I had to."

"And I meant it when I said I'd stay in Lima, this is my home, I have no need to leave it, except on breaks and vacations, I'd like to travel and see the world, but I love the feel of home too, even if everyone does stick their noses into my business," I grump the last bit.

"Yes Kurt, what kind of man are you to engage in those kind of things," he's teasing me and tickling my sides as I attempt to stay close to him and fend him off at the same time, "I'll have to keep an eye on you and make sure you don't lead me off my righteous path."

"Me? It's not me that's the problem Sebastian, you're the one who keeps tempting me with desserts, you really should cool down," I rarely engage in physical silliness but I can't resist picking him up bridal style and I kiss him to distract him as I ease him over the side of the pool.

Then I drop him.

Lifting all those tyres has made me much stronger than I look and as Sebastian goes under with a shocked expression everyone else is staring at me too.

The meerkat comes up spluttering and vowing revenge on me as I run around the garden to avoid him. Cheering from the pool alternates between them wanting me escaping and wanting Sebastian catching me. He goes one way around a table and I make my escape only to discover he feigned and he grabs me dragging me over to the pool.

I go into the pool to the sound of my name being chanted and then all hell breaks loose again and Sebastian's in the pool too and more splashing and messing around happens.

As the host I do have certain duties and I slip out of the pool to make sure dad and Will are happy at the barbeque and that everything else is fine. Dripping water everywhere it's a good thing it's summer and a very nice day or we'd all be freezing. I've put piles of towels everywhere for people and everyone knew to bring a change of clothing just in case.

The whole party is being a complete success and I jump back into the pool in time for a girls verses boys competition to start up, I hurry over to the girls and we hold nothing back and cheat as outrageously as we can, in short we make mincemeat of them and crow our victory to the clear blue skies.

Warm arms snag me for a kiss and then I get the very wonderful sight of Sebastian stripping off his soaking wet top, "You owe me a shirt Kurt, don't think I won't collect."

"Raiding my wardrobe again?" I sass and then call people to the rapidly growing pile of food being kept hot for them.

The deafening noise of the party quietens down as food is demolished and as this party is made up of Glee kids its not long until the music and singing starts up. Luckily there are a set of drums and some handy guitars stashed behind a screen, as well as a keyboard and other instruments as they might be required.

Sitting next to Sebastian I groan as Don't Stop Believing starts up and all the others get up to sing along, I notice no one asks me, so I use the time to cuddle into my boyfriend who's looking back and forth between them and me and frowning.

One by one they take over the stage and the guys swop in and out playing backing music, the improvised dance floor of the grass fills with people and I sway on my seat as I enjoying seeing them have so much fun.

David and Kyle are in the middle of it and they're so in love, I'm glad I did this for them, I'm glad they're so happy, I'm glad they'll always have somewhere to come home to.

And then a few suggestions get shouted out and Will waves his hands and asks Puck to play for him as he wants to sing the same song he sang at the end of our first year of Glee.

The first few strains of music fill the air and Sebastian stiffens next to me and he whispers, "Tiger, sing, Kurt babe, sing, let me hear you."

His eyes are so very green and earnest, "Only if you want to Kurt, I won't push but they need to hear you sing, they should have asked you to join them, are you ready to sing again? Do you feel the need to sing again?"

Do I?

I've been having lessons with Will and frankly I could teach myself better than he does, and then the intro is creeping steadily to the first verse.

What should I do?

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	36. Chapter 36

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**36**

The need to sing and to be the centre of attention at the same time isn't the same as it used to be, but the need to sing is still there and I know Bas will accept either decision.

When Will goes to sing the first few words I beat him to it and project my voice, he falters and we share a grin so he sits back and I stay where I am wrapped up in one of Sebastian's arms.

Gasps run through the crowd and this part I do love as they turn to stare at me, most of them smile, David and Kyle are swaying together and I get a thumbs up and a wink from them.

Lingering on the last note I let it die and smugly lean into Bas, "Thank you, that was fun," I murmur to him.

"You sound like an angel, I want a duet at some point Kurt, you said you've been having lessons and I'm so taking advantage of that," he murmurs back, squeezes me and stands up with a smirk.

Sauntering topless to the makeshift stage he talks to Will who nods and then a few of the guys give Bas a long look but agree to play. And what is it with my boyfriends and singing Train songs? Though I admit I do like the group and Sebastian's natural charisma coupled with a lovely voice and dance moves soon has us Glee kids joining in. I can't help noticing that he captures my eyes on certain lyrics and I flush guiltily as 'Drive by' comes to a close.

Could he really mean it? Did he enjoy that night with me all those years ago and he just got scared? David and Kyle are giving me looks that seem to say that could be the answer, or did Sebastian need to grow up a little first so he could come back to me and be in a relationship?

He doesn't give me a chance to think because he's talking to the guys again and then he's singing a much slower song, Jason Mraz's 'I won't give up'. With a hand he motions to me and I join him harmonising behind the main melody. I walk over to him and his hand grabs mine, those long fingers lace in mine.

Green eyes hold mine and he keeps encouraging me until we are singing together, neither of us is the lead we both are. Swaying beside him I lose myself in the music and in him.

It's not until the music stops and there is cheering and clapping that I remember I'm supposed to be throwing a party for David and Kyle. Except that Bas is pulling me onto the grass and that long lean body is pressed against mine as he whispers, "You still sound like an angel and damn am I going to do my best to make you scream tonight."

Scandalised I poke him in the side as he laughs at me, "Pervert," I hiss half heartedly at him, but I spoil it by kissing his neck.

The party is a complete success and everyone chips in to help tidy up at the end, the pool is going to be left for a bit longer and I can see it getting some serious use this summer. Waving people off I do another walk round to make sure we haven't missed anything only to catch a glimpse of David and Kyle being sappy and cute together.

"Sickening isn't it," Sebastian has snuck up behind me and cuddles me, "Will we have to do that too? Because if we do I'm going to have to practice and it could take years…"

Warmed at that thought I smirk up at him, "Poor poor Sebastian, forced to hug and cuddle and be cute," he pulls a tragic face, "We'll have to counter balance it with us being snarky at people," he grins at that.

"Come to bed tiger, let me make you scream," he tugs on my hand and against my better judgement I follow him into the house and saying goodnight to my family I trail after him up the stairs and into my bedroom.

"You know my family are sleeping in this house don't you," I murmur as he reels me for a hug, "We can't be too loud or they'll never survive the night unscathed."

"Trust me," he nibbles on my ear as I shiver in his arms.

"DUDES!" A scandalised Finn is standing in the open doorway, "DOOR!" The door is slammed and we laugh silently at my brother as he stomps loudly down the hallway.

And then Sebastian kisses me, it's not a gentle kiss, it's hard and demanding and urgent. His lips are moulded against mine, his tongue is soon surging into my mouth and we battle for dominance even as our hands are tearing at clothes and rubbing at skin as it becomes available for our greedy touches.

Walking me backwards to the bed this is the same confident and experienced Sebastian from the hotel room and I just know this night is going to be amazing, if only I could somehow convince my family to move out for a few hours.

The bed hits the back of my knees and we tumble to the bed wrapped up in each other and the rising passion.

A bang on the door makes us freeze in place, "Guys?" It's dad, "Don't forget Sebastian has work in the morning, and Kurt, you have accounts to do."

"Damn," I grunt out my current frustrations that are poking into Sebastian's thigh, just as his are equally as strong on my thigh.

"I got this," he kisses me and then slithers off the bed by my feet, hands grab my legs and yank me closer to the edge as I struggle not to yelp, then he's tugging my pants down.

Confused at what he's going to do I'm unprepared when he deep throats me in one go and I nearly scream at the heat and the wet and suction that are suddenly all around my cock. Writhing and trying not to thrust up into him I grip the bedspread and my back arches.

Snatching up a pillow I bite into it as Bas' mouth and tongue go to work on me, one of his arms pines me down to the bed and his other hand wraps around my balls to squeeze gently. He bobs, he sucks, he licks and it's been too long, so in desperation I bat at his head, "Bas, going to…" he stops for a second winks at me with his lips wrapped around me and then goes right back to his blow job so I take that as permission and concentrate on not screaming as the pressure builds for a few more seconds and then I'm orgasming as he swallows around my cock sucking down everything he can.

Collapsing onto the bed I groan softly and let go of the pillow to breathe as quietly as I can riding out the after effects of Sebastian being far too talented for his own good.

A warm body cuddles up to me and I automatically kiss him to taste myself on his lips, "Did you have fun tiger?" He teases. Nodding I lay there for a minute or two and then try and move by sitting up.

"You didn't go," I reach out to him, "Let me return the favour," he bats at my hand and shakes his head, "Sebastian please…"

"Nah it's more fun to let you owe me one and then I can get interest on it and make you pay it back in full," he's grinning and I just know he is so going to collect on it.

"I'm your boyfriend I don't pay interest," I defend myself from future mischief as I dread to think what he might ask of me.

"Really?" He pauses in taking his pants off, "That's not fair, I was so going to use that against you too and make you pay exorbitant interest rates. You didn't even read the small print, I could have made you pay that off for years."

Rolling my eyes at him I fold up my clothes and put on a pair of clean boxers to slide into bed. He turns off the light and leaps for the bed, a brief tussle starts up and then we're wound around each other.

I'm going to have to add compulsive toucher and cuddler to his traits.

"Night mon bel homme," he breathes over my skin.

"Goodnight Bas, thank you for pursuing me and thank you for all your help with the party, you realise it was brilliant because we both worked on it?" I smirk into his shoulder, "Now that we've joined forces nothing can stand in our way," I try to make it sound dramatic and terrifyingly evil.

"They won't know what hit them," he agrees, "I know you'll insist we use this only for good, but I swear I will be bad now and again, I can't destroy my reputation completely."

"Yes dear," And I sound as henpecked as I can which results in him tickling me.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	37. Chapter 37

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**37**

Considering we went to bed late last night I wake up a bit earlier than my alarm and Sebastian is wrapped around me spooning me with a very hard piece of anatomy jabbing me in my back.

Technically I still owe him from last night.

Morally torn I turn over to face him and he jabs me in my stomach. Nibbling my lip I decide to try and wake him up with a kiss and I end up getting an 'hmm' from him.

Kissing down his jaw I take my time on his neck and his shoulder. My hands roam his torso and I'm getting turned on with the puffs of breaths he gives and the way his hips buck now and again. He's warm to the touch and my fingers explore him as thoroughly as I can.

"Hmm, tiger," his voice is sleepy and its exactly what I've been waiting for. Pushing him onto his back my hand skitters down his stomach following the path of freckles and I really want to take my time there another day. Reaching the waistband of his boxers I get them down and off and he mutters, "Seriously? God tiger, what a way to wake up."

Kissing down his stomach and chasing a few stray freckles as I go, I lap at his now fully engorged cock and I get to taste his pre cum. Salty with an aftertaste of Sebastian. I'm fairly sure I'll choke myself if I deep throat him and settle for licks and small sucks with plenty of fingers and hands.

Sebastian thrashes slightly as I work on him and I try and remember what he did to me, translating licks to his foreskin and the way he'd fondled my balls. Taking more of him into my mouth I bob slowly doing my best to not catch him with my teeth and to keep up the suction.

I can't be doing too badly as I get more and more pre cum from him and then he's tapping me on the shoulder, "Tiger, nearly there, babe." I give him the same wink he gave me and he chuckles, "Okay mon amour," I jump at the name and then I'm busy swallowing around the pulsing cock in my mouth as he cums with a strangled groan.

Flat out on his back Sebastian's panting with his eyes closed and even now he's smirking. One eye cracks open slightly and he blows me a kiss, "Tiger, you can do that anytime you want," he rubs his face and crooks a finger at me.

Laying down next to him I startle when he pulls me in for a hug and angles so he kisses me. I jerk my head away when his tongue runs along my lip but he just encourages me to open up and then our tongues tangle, he breaks the kiss to mutter, "Fuck that's sexy, tasting me in your mouth."

A bang on my door is followed by, "Boy's you have work today, don't be late," and my dad stomps off down the hall.

"Cockblocker," is all Bas says and we get up. I grab the shower first and argue against sharing as he'll only distract me, "But tiger, that's what the shower's for."

"No Bas, showers are for washing," and I the close the door in his pouting face, "I won't be long," I sing through the door at him to hear him groan again.

It isn't until I'm dressing that I realise I bypassed the scales completely, I didn't need them, Sebastian's eyes where more than enough to say that I looked good. Bouncing down the stairs for breakfast I breeze into the kitchen.

To find Finn raiding the fridge, "Finn!"

He jumps guiltily, "Hey Kurt, wow you're dressed and not pinning Bas, you know you should ask him first and have you seen the bread?"

Rolling my eyes I get him the bread from the cupboard, "Thanks bro, hey bro?"

"Hmm?" I'm getting mixing bowls out for homemade pancakes, heart healthy versions for dad.

"Are you and Bas," and when did my brother start calling Sebastian Bas? "Serious? You seem kinda serious and I've not seen you this glowy and happy in..." the man frowns, "Nope can't think when, a long time. So are you serious? I mean the two of you."

Stunned I stand there awkwardly, "I think so. I mean I'm fairly sure I am." I'm not sure how to explain it to Finn. "I know Bas' reputation, and I know what he was like as a kid, and I think he like likes me," oh that is so High School of me. "We've not really talked about it though," I flush guiltily, "And after my little moment of running away so he couldn't break up with me..." I stop at the knowing look on his face, "Okay Finn spill."

A big sappy grin breaks out, "Bro you should have seen it, Bas started texting Dave to find out if you were still alive and then when you asked if I wanted to go to the fair the next day I totally went all James Bond on you and took you off so they could stage an intervention for you and Kyle says Burt grilled Sebastian for like hours and he wouldn't budge until he got you in his life," I'm swinging between being flattered at how far Sebastian's gone to keep me and annoyed at my family for interfering in my life even if I did need it. And I'm worried how Finn got that out in one breath, I know he's practicing speeches but he needs to breathe.

"So then I coordinated and got your phone and there were only calls from Bas on there," I get an even bigger grin from him, "And then you got sick and then Bas made you all better."

And then Finn frowns, "Bro? What happens if Bas breaks your heart?" He looks really worried now, "You're not going to go all zombie like again are you?"

I can't resist those puppy eyes and hug him, "No I'm not going to go all zombie like."

"Good," warm arms hold me, "'Coz the others are all going on about how horrible Bas was in high school but none of us were perfect, except maybe Tina and Mike most of the time, and if we all got to grow up to be nice people then why can't Bas? So I told them to butt out and leave you alone, and then Mercedes got scarey on them and they backed down."

"Thank you," I mean it and add, "Finn, you don't have to worry about me being a zombie anymore. I've woken up now," I mix in David's metaphor too for sleeping beauty. "And the only reason it all went so bad was because I put all my dreams on NYADA and Blaine and I forgot everything else, I forgot my family, my friends, my various other talents. I was so focused on NYADA being my ticket out of Lima that it crushed me when I didn't get in and Rachel did, I did everything right and I still wasn't good enough for them.

"And then I broke up with Blaine because of his horrible parents, and Blaine didn't fight for me, I wasn't worth it to him, and I just couldn't cope. All my life everyone has told me no, or that I'm ugly, or too gay, or too everything but perfect. And the one guy in my life who was supposed to love me walked away like it was easy to do and..." Oh god it still hurts, but it's more of a sting now than a full-blown stab in my heart.

I rest my head on Finn's chest and he holds me, now this was something he wouldn't have done so easily back then, he might still get freaked out by the gay thing but he's much calmer with it too. "With Bas, he's, hopefully, going to be a huge thing in my life, a giant massive thing, but he won't be everything. I really, really like the Bastian I know now, and I want to know everything about him, I want him to know everything about me, even the bad bits and I'm scared," I can finally admit it, "I'm scared I won't be enough for him and he's going to move on as easily as Blaine did."

"Bro," Finn gets his inspirational look on his face but before he can say anything...

"I'm scared too," Sebastian is standing by the kitchen door, "After everything I've done in my fucked up life, why the hell should you even like me and yet you say you really like me," that blank unreadable look is back on his face.

"I do," I tell him, "I really really like like you," and I sound like I'm twelve telling a boy I have a crush on him.

"I really really like like you too," he says.

We stand there staring at each other and we're both adults we should be able to do this, but we stand there like idiots. And then Finn pushes me from behind until I'm safe in Sebastian's arms.

"That's better," my brother declares and then asks, "So where's the butter?"

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.


	38. Chapter 38

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**38**

Cuddling in the kitchen isn't the best idea as everyone filters in and interrupts us, but mostly they congratulate Sebastian and I get back slaps. David and Kyle out do us on the cute front but I don't want to step away from Sebastian and I stay in his arms for as long as I can.

Unfortunately work calls me away and I go reluctantly, which seems to please Sebastian.

Ordinarily today would be the workday from hell, instead I float serenely through today and I hum along to the radio. Nothing fazes me and even a visit from Mr Paris doesn't dampen my spirits, it's just a story to tell Sebastian later. That and they way all the guys are staring at me and muttering, that will definitely make him laugh.

My phone beeps and I get a message from my meerkat asking if I want to go to Breadstix tonight and then stay over. I tell him yes and let my family know I'm going out.

If anything that makes me even happier and I drift about the garage getting on the guys' nerves, they practically run for the door when home time rolls around. I shut the garage up and drive home, I should have just enough time to wash up and then scrub a bit more before I go and pick Sebastian up.

Flouncing into the house I enjoy my shower, the salt scrub I found in the back of a cupboard making my skin extra soft, it's like I've been peeled and I feel amazing as I lay back on my bed and wiggle into jeans that are a shade too tight. Pulling on a shirt I smooth it down and then lace up some fantastic looking boots.

At the last second I also raid my giant bag of supplies, I have this sixth sense that says I'm getting lucky tonight. Then I skip out of the door and go to pick my gorgeous boyfriend up.

Running up the stairs to his apartment I knock on his door and when he opens it he's putting his shoes on. Surprising him I hold his face still and kiss him, "Hi Bas!"

"Hey Tiger," he grins against my mouth, "Missed you."

"Missed you too," I let him go and eye up the nice navy slacks, the pale blue shirt, with a tie, and the black shoes, oh, my boyfriend dressed up for me.

Motioning me into the apartment with his head he smirks, "Got you a present…"

"Really?" I wonder what it could be? He leads the way into his bedroom and I almost expect him to ambush me and tumble me onto the bed but he hands over a rolled up poster.

Unrolling it I find myself holding a poster of giant South American lily pads, confused I stare at it as his arms slide around my waist and he whispers into my ear, "So you think there's room for two of us on that lily pad?"

He remembered!

Twisting around I hug him back, being careful of my poster, "Always. There will always be room for you on my lily pad my wonderful Bastian."

His hands wander down to cup my ass and he smirks suggestively, "Good, though it looks like a small lily pad so we'll have to snuggle up a lot."

"Oh," I fake horror, "Not the snuggling! Anything but the snuggling with my sexy, cuddly, amazing boyfriend."

We both keep straight faces for a few seconds and then we're laughing. As I'm coming back here later I put the poster down carefully and pat it. Then I put the supplies for later beside it and escort Sebastian down to my car.

Holding his door open for him gets me a raised eyebrow and that makes me determined to act the gentleman to him for the evening. I hold the door at Breadstix and they give us a non-booth table so I hold his chair for him and his eyes are twinkling as he plays along.

The waitress Ah's over us and leaves us to choose our meal, "I'm so going to get you back," he promises.

"I look forward to it," I sass him and he chuckles. "So how was work," I'm busting to tell him about the guys.

"Good. You?" He asks and then I tell him about how I'd freaked the men out and he's laughing at my story. When I throw in Mr Paris he laughs louder and I know people are staring at us but I don't care as he looks carefree and happy, it suits him.

It sets the tone for the whole meal, we eat, we talk, we laugh, neither of us is drinking and it isn't until the manager is standing next to our table that I even notice what the time is.

Refusing to let Sebastian pay for our dinner I hold his hand and walk him out of the restaurant. The staff are glad to see us go so they can escape for the night too.

Out in the parking lot I open the car door for him and then hop in to find him amused, "You do realise if I were a girl," he says as I start the engine up, "I'd think you were only paying for my meal to get in my pants."

As usual he shocks me and I nearly get the wrong gear to back into the fence behind us, he laughs as I flush and then he leans over, "It's okay Kurt, I noticed the supplies you left in my room," he waggles his eyebrows at me and then scrunches his face up cutely, I get a kiss on my nose and he murmurs, "Drive tiger and I'll totally give you dessert when we get home."

Trying to act nonchalantly I drive us home and stick to the speed limit the whole time. He's being quiet and I daren't glance at him, he'll put me off and distract me somehow. We make it home in one piece and I hustle him up the steps.

"Kurt," he whispers in my ear.

"Hmm," I'm fumbling with his door key.

"You forgot to lock your car up," he's still whispering.

"What?" I stare at him and then hurry back down the stairs wailing, "My baby!"

Skidding out onto the street I zap the car just in time as a guy is standing next to it. "Ahh Mr Hummel," oh god it's the traffic cop that busted me for speeding. "I'm glad to see you're taking the proper precautions with your car, next time make sure you lock it, you can't be too careful."

"I'll make sure he takes care of it," Sebastian's leaning against the doorway at the bottom of his stairs.

The cop eyes me up and I know I'm flushing again, "Well you two have a nice night," and there is so much innuendo in that sentence I want to die on the spot.

"Thanks, we will," and Sebastian takes me by the hand and leads me up the stairs to his apartment and draws me into a hug. "What is it with you and that cop tiger?" He teases me, "You sure there's nothing you want to tell me about a scandalous criminal past?"

"Urgh," I bury my face into his neck and let him hold me. "Why me? I've spent years being boring, why does he have to turn up to catch me every single time?"

Chuckling Sebastian shrugs, "Luck? Fate? Perhaps you are destined to meet again…" he catches sight of my glare, "Sorry mon bel homme, it's the writer in me searching for greater meaning in everything, the divine thread linking us all together, that thing that makes life not so random, that gives us chances we never knew existed if only we're brave enough to take them."

Oh, well that sounds better and I smile at him.

He smiles back and we start to kiss, softly, lovingly, there's no hurry to it. This time Sebastian takes control of it and I melt into him. I remember this from the hotel, him dictating how fast we move and as his tongue licks my lip I open up for him and hum contentedly as he deepens the kiss.

I am so getting lucky tonight and I smirk as he walks me backwards into his bedroom.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human.

Well this is almost it, one more chapter to go, and then the end.


	39. Chapter 39

Please see chapter one for all warnings etc…

* * *

**Make My Heart Start Beating**

**39**

Backed into his room I cling to him and I'm not the slightest bit shocked when his fingers start to unbutton my shirt. Following his lead I undo his tie and start on his shirt.

Piece by piece we strip down, I make him fold my clothes, I don't need them to look like they've been through hell by sitting on his floor all night. Hopping around I get my last sock off and then he sweeps me onto the bed.

Flat on my back with Sebastian hovering over me we kiss and it gets dirtier and filthier, our moans fill the room and when I hear the lube pop I wiggle impatiently for him.

So of course he stops and stares down at me, "What?" I ask him, "Is there something on my face? Do I have something in my teeth?"

"No," he shakes his head, "It's just," now he hesitates, "Did you mean it? This morning in the kitchen? Do you really like like me? It's not just sex for you? Because when I bumped into you in the supermarket you really didn't want anything to do with me and…"

And I'm looking at a very vulnerable Sebastian Smythe. Carefully I cup his face, "Yes, I meant it. I was horrible to you in the supermarket because I thought you knew about me not leaving Lima, I thought you were the same boy, I thought you were being mean to me. Once I realised you didn't know I realised you weren't being mean on purpose."

"Good," he breathes out and I'm engulfed in a hug, "I've been dreaming of you ever since that night in the hotel. God I didn't want to leave you in the morning, no one's ever made me feel like that, I lashed out and I fled. I've been running ever since, I facebook stalked a few people and when I heard the New Directions where going to be in Lima I took a chance you'd be here, god if only I'd been brave enough to stay in the damn hotel instead of…"

At his mention of the hotel and the hateful words he'd said to me I stiffen in his arms, he glances up, "Tiger?"

I just smile and go to hug him tighter but he pushes me away, "You know I didn't mean what I said that morning, don't you? You know now I was just scared? Right?"

"I…" I can't tell him how much they hurt and still sting, not now that we're getting on and this fragile thing between us is growing, "That's in the past," I reach out to him and he dodges me.

"Oh my god, you believed me? All these years you've believed me? After all the shit I put everyone through, all the stuff I pulled and you believed me?" He looks horrified, "Kurt I swear, I didn't mean a word of it, I swear."

"Okay," I think he's more upset right now than I am, "I think I've worked out that you like like me Sebastian," I soothe him, "You realise you went up against my dad for me, you dared to take on Burt Hummel when I was being the idiot and running away from you."

He frowns, "That was easy, he loves you, all I had to do was convince him I love you too, as long as there was a chance you wanted me in your life I was going for it."

"Then I completely forgive you for what you said in the hotel that morning," and this time he lets me close to him and I'm back to being hugged and snuggled within an inch of my life. Kissing his shoulder I nuzzle up his neck and goosebumps run down his arm.

"You are far too nice," he mutters into my skin, "I'm going to have my work cut out protecting you," he grins, "And bailing you out of jail every time you get busted by that cop."

I playfully poke him with a finger and he grunts, "Yes dear," I singsong. He retaliates and tickles me, "Hey," I fight back and we roll over the bed.

With a few moves he has me pinned to the bed completely at his mercy and he smirks down at me, "I'm glad I took the risk to come and find you, I'm glad you're giving me a chance Kurt, I promise to try and be a good boyfriend to you," there are shadows lurking in his eyes.

"Did you mean it?" He asks.

"Mean what?" I ask him currently basking in the knowledge that Sebastian actually came back to Lima, the middle of nowhere, looking for me.

"You said I made your heart start beating," his face has closed down again and I blink, "After the kitchen table dessert incident, you said the reason you let me do that was because I…"

"Oh. I said it out loud?" And I'm flushing again. He's still tense and unsure so I take the chance and tell the truth, "Yes, you really did make my heart start beating."

With that he collapses on top of me, "You made mine do that years ago, I really think I love you, I've never been in love before, you're all I think about, and not just sex, I want to know everything about you Kurt Hummel, I want to spend the rest of my life making you smile," which makes me smile.

"Well I'd say you're doing very well," I kiss his forehead.

"Can we not have sex tonight?" He asks and my jaw drops, "I've done sex so often I want to sleep with you, I want to wake up with you and in the morning I want to try making love with you."

"Okay," I agree and end up on my back in his bed with him wrapped up all around me like I'm going to vanish in the night.

This conversation stuff about relationships is harder than it looks. Beside me Sebastian is slipping into sleep and I stroke his hair. "Mon Coeur," I whisper and hold him close.

We've barely touched the surface of us, there's so much to learn about him, about his family, and I'm guessing they don't get on that well, if at all. About why he tensed when I was fingering him. What his favourite colour is, what his favourite song is, his favourite food…

On the other side of the room is the tiger lily I bought him, it's starting to droop but he kept it and he's been watering it. I have a feeling that having Sebastian in my life is going to be a crazy ride every single day. I've been coasting along not doing anything for years and he's not going to let that continue and it's not going to be easy but it is going to be fun.

I've had more fun and laughed more and smiled more and just everything good more since he came back to Lima.

I'm going to college or night school, I haven't decided, I have a business to run, a boyfriend to pester into writing his book, a dad and a brother to run around after and organise this end of their political careers, teens to help and to educate…

And then I smile, I might not have made it out of Lima, I might have thought I was stuck here but I've carved out a life for myself, I have friends, I have colleagues, I have a boyfriend, I have a family.

I might not have gotten lucky in one sense of the word with Sebastian tonight, but I've gotten lucky in so many other ways.

Settling down I close my eyes glad that I ran into Sebastian in that supermarket, and the bar, and the coffee shop, and the common room, and the fair, and the cinema…

I still don't believe in dreams, not for me, but with hard work and some communication maybe I can have a good life, one filled with love and laughter, no prince for me, just a very special man who's willing to fight for me, for us.

No Broadway career with my name up in lights, but one where I can see the results of my work and watch them drive around. Or watch the kids grow up and discover things about themselves they never knew and help them learn what they want to do with their lives, help them find their dreams.

To my teenaged self I bet that sounds like hell, stuck with Sebastian Smythe in Lima and toiling away at the garage and helping with Glee club and cheerleading practice.

To me, here and now, it sounds perfect.

Now I really understand a bit more about Mr Schue, the man has his faults, oh god do not get me started on his faults, but he walked away from his own chance on Broadway with a smile on his face and at this moment in time I'd do the same. Your name in lights is amazing but it isn't everything, it isn't the thing that gets you up every single day, it isn't the thing that warms you inside.

Maybe I'll change my mind in the future and go for it again, but it'll be because I want to be on that stage, I won't be chasing approval or proving anything to anyone, I won't be running away from hate and fear, I'm me and the world had better watch out because Kurt Hummel is back and I'm so going to live my life my way, screw everyone else, if they don't like it they can learn to live with it.

Tomorrow is another day and I'll tackle each day as it comes, together, with Sebastian.

In my chest my heart is beating steadily and I shift so my hand is over his chest and yes, his heart is beating too, how can life get much better than this?

* * *

A/N: Sorry for any and all mistakes, I've tried to catch those I could, but I'm only human (still).

Yes I know there are many many threads left unwritten. Perhaps I might get around to writing the sequel, depends on how badly written you think this one is.

And so this is it… No more MMHSB. Thank you so much for every time you read a chapter (upping my stats), fav'ed, alerted, or dared to touch the button named 'review'. It was all appreciated. This has been much more nerve wracking than normal, this was all pre-written, no input from you as I went along.

So thank you and I'm glad you've enjoyed it was hugely fun to write and so silly when I needed it in my life. Have fun peeps and see you round some time (okay take a big hug from me too you deserve it).

Cheers

GP13


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